Jessica's Happily Ever After?
by Lalaland972
Summary: Sequel to "But Why am I Jessica?". Follow Jessica on her life after the "happy ending". Real life, her past, a Twilight Saga storyline that will not quit, and everything in between collides as Jessica struggles to grasp the happy ending she has always wanted for herself in this second chance at life.
1. Chapter 1

**Jessica's Happily Ever After?**

_Sequel to "But Why am I Jessica?"_

_Please do not read further unless you had read the prequel, want to be confused, and/or don't mind spoilers!_

**SUMMARY: **

Sequel to "But Why am I Jessica?". Follow Jessica on her life after the "happy ending". Real life, her past, a Twilight Saga storyline that will not quit, and everything in between collides as Jessica struggles to grasp the happy ending she has always wanted for herself in this second chance at life.

**Chapter 1**

* * *

**[Edward Arc]**

"**Five Years"**

A beautiful summer was coming to an end, but it was ending on a sour note before I left to my freshman year of college.

The bitterness was due to the conversation I had been avoiding having with Edward.

In the Cullen's house, I followed Edward's lead past his family in their living room. I discreetly shook my head to Alice as I witnessed her opening her mouth to call to us. She must have seen what was coming. The only question was, had Edward? It was annoying being limited in my secrets from him. My only real secret was my previous life that no one was aware of.

I marched up the steps in silence behind him. A thick cloud of uncertainty hovered over us. It had been growing all summer. At least, I knew I was aware of its presence.

Edward gravely walked to his bed and waited for me to sit next to him.

"What do you know?" I asked solemnly as I nervously fidgeted my hands in my lap as I sat near him.

"Five years?" The heart break was evident in his voice. I couldn't bear to look at his face as I had been preparing for this conversation. I willed myself to channel my logical side and to not let my emotions dictate and lead me astray from my final decision already made.

"Any longer would look weird! Five year is generous. Think of what people will see when I am 23 and kissing you who doesn't look a day older than 17. We cannot last past then; I am sorry, Edward. I refuse to grow old with someone who will always look young. I want to grow old with someone. I am sorry, I know that is hard to hear. But it is the truth." I took a deep breath to combat the sniffling rising in my nostrils and shut down the tears from forming. _Don't you dare meet his eyes, Jessica. It will be your undoing. Keep focused on your hands, if you must!_

"What about us getting married?" Edward delivered a low blow and I grew livid.

"No. That is not fair. I told you in the beginning you could not hold me to Alice's vision of the future!" I spoke in a deathly fury putting aside my heartbreak. Edward buried his face in his hands.

"I am sorry. I know you would be happy with being with me as I grew old, but I cannot say the same. I don't want weird looks from people. I want to have kids. I want to spend time with family and friends and not have to hide from them to protect the fact you will never age. Please think of this for me, Edward. I beg you. I will give you five blissful and loving years. Let's enjoy that time and treasure it. We will cross the bridge of what happens next when we get there. But for now, let us have these five years. Okay?"

Edward picked up his head from his hands. He faced his body towards me. He extended his hand to lift my chin to meet his eyes. "If that is what you want, and will make you happy? Then okay…" I pushed back the rising anxiety in me from his despondent tone. _He said okay. I take it and don't question it. We have 5 years. Until I am 23. That will be enough. Then we have to go our separate ways. _

"I love you, Edward." Edward leaned in and kissed the single tear streaming down my cheek.

"Me too, Jessica." The grief riddled in his voice was unfair. I was still here. We still had time.

* * *

**[Jacob Arc]**

"**A Million Steel Cables or Roots?"**

It was bound to happen. I foolishly thought fate could change in this world. I just didn't expect it to be forced once we returned from Europe.

...

After I began unpacking from our trip and dividing my clothes for laundry in my bedroom, I received a call on my cell phone from Bella.

"Bella!" I shouted excitedly over the speaker into my phone.

"No, sorry it's Edward, Jessica." I quickly did a double take to make sure I read the caller ID correctly. It was labeled as Bella Cullen on the screen. I was not mistaken.

"Oh, Hi Edward. How's it going?"

"I need you to relay a message to Jacob for us." Edward skipped over the pleasantries usually exchanged at the beginning of a call and that bothered me.

"I am positive Bella has his contact number in her phone. You can call him yourself," I replied stubbornly.

"No!" Edward said too rushed. Because I detected a hint of panic in his voice, I decided to be kind and offer to pass on his message. _Wait... he didn't turn Bella, did he?!_

I attempted to keep a cool head and try not to assume the worst. Bella assured me before that Edward was making them wait until she was turned before they had sex. And Bella wanted to graduate from college first. There were _still_ three years left for her. I was being ridiculous.

"What can I pass on for you, Edward?" I asked politely. I attempted to offer him a courtesy he had yet to bestow me in this phone conversation.

"It's hard to explain over the phone. Can we...meet up? And I can let you know what you missed out on the last month?" The raw emotion dripping from his voice created a pit in my stomach. Something had to be wrong.

I glanced at the clock on my bedroom wall. It read 11:30 PM. "It's a little late for me to leave the house. If it is urgent, could you make it to my bedroom window to chat? Jacob gets away with it, so I think we should be fine."

"I'll be over in ten minutes." Edward hung up the phone and I spent the next ten minutes letting crazy thoughts whirl into my head of what to expect from Edward Cullen.

Like clockwork, Edward lightly knocked on my bedroom window at his specified time. _Probably could have opened that for him. Whoops. _

I unhinged the latches and opened the window. Edward's pale face popped in first through my bedroom before the rest of his body followed. His copper hair was the same. His clothing style was the same. His golden eyes assessed my own the same. Nothing looked different about the vampire in front of me despite the fact we hadn't been this close in proximity for over a year.

I gestured for him to take a seat on my bed with my hand as I walked to my desk chair. Once I was settled in, I attempted to prepare myself for Edward's message.

"Hi Jessica," Edward greeted me with the charm of a vampire. His lips attempted to smile, but they could not muster to deviate from the default stoic look on his face he was stuck in since he arrived.

I offered him a closed mouth smile to prod him to get on with it.

"Bella and I...well, we had a kid." _Renesmee!_ "And Bella is now a vampire. It was to save her though." I feigned shock and surprise to a certain extent. I had not expected this event to take place so soon. That was in fact a surprise.

Edward continued to explain what happened from the beginning. I struggled to listen as I felt a slight ringing in my ears. I was being warned I felt. Breaking Dawn's plot was here. But everything was so different. Would the Volturi still come? Would Jacob imprint on Renesmee? _**Jacob! **_As my heart began to sink, I dropped a net to catch it. _Jacob imprinted on me. ME. It only happens once. Right? Right! Ease up Jessica and don't panic. Bella and Edward can handle this like in the book. _

I stopped Edward once he was progressing on the pregnancy specifics. I did not need to be retold information I already knew. "So, you need me to tell Jacob first. He is separated from his pack, so they won't hear his thoughts. But you want me to get him on your side in case the pack decides you guys broke the treaty, right?" I asked Edward despite the disbelief I was having to deal with this now.

Edward's eyes were downcast as he shook his head yes.

"I'll handle Jacob. Please let me know when Bella can have visitors." I smiled at Edward despite my internal need to scream, cry and kick at him for getting Bella pregnant. _They were supposed to wait!_

Edward walked forward and dropped to his knees before me in my chair. He took both of my hands in his own and graciously thanked me one too many times.

I withdrew my right hand from his grasp and patted his head to assure him it would all be fine despite knowing the hell he was about to embark through. "Jacob will understand, or I will make him."

Edward rose from his knees and chuckled at my confidence. "I should get back. I need to protect them both. I hope you can also meet Renesmee soon. She is something else."

"I am sure she is." Edward stared at me oddly. He was carefully studying me. I felt uncomfortable. I worried he was peeling back the layers that revealed my current calm demeanor was a farce.

"Everything okay?" He followed up to ask when his visual assessment was complete.

"Of course. Jacob and I just returned from a lovely trip. Couldn't be happier!" The false joy was fairly easy to pretend since I was actually feeling it up until Edward called.

"Let me know how it goes with Jacob." I nodded to Edward before he began climbing out through my window. Once he was outside, I proceeded to walk over to shut and lock it. I was startled to see Edward still on the roof.

"Jessica, it's good seeing you again. You look well. I am glad you and Jacob had a good trip." Edward smiled and I felt a calm feeling wash over me as he jumped off my roof.

...

The next day I had a lot on my plate. Packing for my "first" semester at college was the highest priority aside from conversing with Jacob on the Cullen family update.

Jacob was aware of my day being spent school shopping with my mom and Daniel, so we had planned to meet up in the evening after dinner.

When dinner came, I received a text message from Jacob.

"Sorry can't make it. I'll stop by later."

I continued to re-read his message and was caught off guard by his cold and distant message. _Am I crazy?_

I scrolled through our text history and found plenty of example messages from Jacob where he had to delay meeting up, but his tone of disappointment was always conveyed in a straight forward message or sad faces. I had to be reading too much into it. Making up nothing into something because I was trying to find something wrong with us. I needed to be confident though. Jacob always showed his love for me. And I knew I would see it when he came over later.

I went to bed at 11 PM with no follow up text received from Jacob.

I awoke to a rapping noise coming from my window. I fondled through my bedsheets to pull out my cell phone that was by my stomach. It was 1 AM and I had no new text messages.

I sleepily rubbed my eyes and walked to my window. Jacob was finally here, and I didn't know how to feel.

I opened up the window and allowed him inside. I carefully took in the beautiful face I was just dreaming about. I recalled him looking happier in my dreams when seeing me though.

"I am sorry." His voice carried the weight of a lifetime of disappointment. I was terrified of what he would tell me next.

"I stopped by the Cullen's after Billy told me that Bella had been sick and Charlie hadn't heard from her. I found out about the _baby_ and Bella. Edward said he told you last night." Jacob tenderly mentioned the word baby and not her name. I knew what was coming.

"Yes, I wanted to tell you today."

"So...I saw Renesmee, the baby, and I- god. I don't know how. I don't understand any of this. It was so different, Jessica. Then what happened with you. But I felt the same weight of it. The..."

"Imprint," I finished for him softly.

I mulled over telling Jacob in that moment the truth of who I was and how I came to be here. Why I speculated he could imprint on me after knowing me already for months. But I released the safety net cast around my heart and let it sink to the bottom pit of my soul. It knew the truth. One I could not deny.

Roots could be dug up. Cut out. Thrown away. Or Replanted. It was different for a million steel cables.

* * *

**[Friendship Arc]**

**"Defining Friendship"**

**MOVED TO IT'S OWN BOOK** called 'Defining Friendship'. Go to my profile to find it.

* * *

_**Author's Note:**__ I am back! Because I am a nutjob, had a burst of inspiration, and tomorrow off… I am posting this on whim for those who read "But Why am I Jessica?". If you dislike my anticipated plan of splitting each chapter into a continuation of each ending and prefer separate chapters, now is your time to voice so. Also, I scrapped slice of life idea. I have stories for each ending. Each to be slapped with the reality of what actually comes after the "happy endings" we left off in "But Why am I Jessica?". Please let me know you what you think with a review, follow or fave. – Lalaland972_


	2. Edward Arc Ch 2

**Jessica's Happily Ever After?**

_Sequel to "But Why am I Jessica?"_

_Author's Note i__: Okay y'all, I read the feedback. I can't bring myself to write just one arc at a time. I feel I want them all to end at the same time (__**if I can make that happen!)**__. __If watching The Bachelor has taught me anything, it is that it is possible to compartmentalize relationships lol. That being said, going forward I'll be updating the arcs as: Edward, Jacob, Friendship. When this book is complete, I'll rearrange all the chapters to be succinct in each arc so future readers won't have to jump around. I hope this will not be too confusing or off putting to anyone. Hope y'all can support me on this. Let me know what you think of each story's progression unless you are here for just one ending lol Thanks for continuing with me on this journey! Per usual, I'll respond to reviews at the end of this chapter! _-Lalaland972

* * *

**Chapter 2**

**[Edward Arc]**

"**Five Years"**

I left Edward alone in his room to give him time to digest our conversation. I ended up leaving one uncomfortable conversation to another. His family knew.

I walked into the living room to feel six pairs of golden of eyes on me. I was leaning towards leaving right away until Alice addressed the elephant in the room.

"So, you're really not going to become a vampire?" Alice voiced tentatively despite knowing my decision was final. I am sure she and the others just wanted to hear it for themselves.

I looked to each member of the Cullen family before I spoke. Emmet with his arm draped around a pleased Rosalie. Carlisle and Esme with their hands intertwined, trying to mask their disappointment for Edward's future. Jasper cleverly at Alice's back as he gave her space to drive the conversation forward.

"No, I will not," I spoke barely above a whisper. Their vampire ears could hear me loud and clear though.

"You're making the right choice, Jessica. You're smarter than Bella was with Edward," Rosalie informed me smugly.

"Rosalie!" Alice snapped at her fiercely. Emmett pulled Rosalie closer to his mouth and whispered so low I could not discern the advice he was giving her. It was not welcomed. Rosalie's satisfied smirk quickly wiped off her face and she gracefully ducked out of Emmett's embrace to stand on the other side of the room.

"What Rosalie meant to say was," Esme graciously intervened to calm the atmosphere around us, "we understand it is your choice and we support your decision as Edward's mate. As a part of_ our __family_." I internally cringed on the word mate. It sounded so final. Like I would never be able to love again. _Why do vampires have to be so __all or nothing__ with_ romance? _We both can find love again after we are over!_

I plastered on a smile to appease Esme that she got her point across and I appreciated it. I honestly did. It was just so...overwhelming when I interacted with them sometimes. Everything was always so dramatic. It got tiring on days like today.

Carlisle was about to provide his parental wisdom as well when Edward descended the stairs. "Can you guys give her break and stop talking about this? I could **also** use a break from the sympathy thoughts overwhelming this room for me. Leave it alone and concentrate on yourselves right now," Edward said gruffly. The irritation radiating off his beautiful face was astonishing. I hardly observed him displaying an emotion beyond joy in my presence over the summer. Today was a miracle in the sense I saw Edward Cullen not only get sad but pissed off. It made our relationship feel even _more_ real to me.

I had the insatiable urge to kiss him in that moment. To feel the passion of him conveying all his hurt and frustration to me with his lips on mine. Pinning me to a wall and-

"Jessica?" Edward beckoned me from my fantasy just as it was getting good. It would never happen though. Edward was only ever soft and delicate with me in his kisses and touches. It was sweet and romantic but lacked a passionate intimacy I had been craving lately. _Totally get Bella's sexual frustration in the books now. God! When is the last time I even had sex? Is this body technically a virgin's body?_

"Jessica!" Edward raised his voice to snap me back to reality once again. "Is something wrong? You're biting your lip. You are starting to draw blood." I felt a blush rise on my cheeks as I extended the tip of my tongue to slide over the wound. _Tastes like rust. Jesus Jessica. Get your shit together. Bleeding bad. Vampires. Duh! Time to haul ass out of here._

"So sorry guys! I don't know what came over me. I should go." I threw an apologetic look to Edward before I said goodbye and raced out their front door.

As I drove away from the Cullen's house, I scolded myself for my recent actions. _What was I thinking? I bring a morose atmosphere to their house then fantasize about my boyfriend in front of his family and draw my own blood? Oh geez. I don't know how to follow up with Edward after this fiasco. And I still need to finish my college shopping list. Freshman orientation is next week. I wonder if I will see Bella there?_

As I pulled up to the driveway of my house, Edward was walking towards our front lawn. _Of course he is. Guess he didn't want to leave things like we did either. I need to tell him can call instead of just showing up. It's a sweet gesture, but kind overwhelming right now. _

I parked my car and proceeded to make my way towards Edward.

"Care to go for a walk?" Edward inquired as he extended the crook of his elbow toward me to lock my arm through. The neutral face that greeted me instead of a face of joy drew concern for me.

"As long as we don't wind up in the woods," I joked to him. Edward frowned and didn't understand my implication. I found it funny at least.

"Sure. Let's go." I locked my arm in his and we walked down Brooks Lane towards the unknown.

"I have many questions. But I will keep this short. I know you are still packing for school." I admired that Edward was always considerate of my time. He never pushed me and always accepted what I gave him. By comparison to the books, it was a lot less time than Bella offered to him. I never wanted to make my world revolve around Edward. Love should add to one's life and not take away from other aspects. Edward understood that about me, and supposedly valued that. If he was lying to me, I would never really know. He kept an excellent poker face. Hence my inability to tell he was in love with me until he confessed.

"Are you lost in your thoughts again?" Edward asked with interest that I would speak on them. He hated he could not read my mind. If he could, we would have never worked out. That I was sure of.

"Nothing of interest, _my dear_," I remarked coyly. It irked him when I used old fashion terms in an endearing way. He interpreted it as me making a jest at him. And he was right. It was fun when the rare occurrence of a reaction was provoked from him. This time the arrow did not hit the target. His inhumanly perfect face remained chiseled in stone of an unphased expression.

"What happened back there?" He asked tenderly with a softness that only he could exhibit towards me. I caught myself about to bite my lip again. I forced my teeth to remain where they should despite myself.

"Well…" Edward gawked at my face. My nervousness was on display and I was sure if I had a mirror in front of me, I would look like a cherry tomato in a brown wig. "Ugh. I can't bring myself to say it." I withdrew my arm from Edward's and used it to cover my face along with my other arm.

"So, it's not another damaging tidbit for our relationship?" I lowered my shoulders in defeat. His resentment towards my decision of course still lingered between us. It hastily diminished my embarrassment over my lust. We had to now shift to talk about our more important conversation. His segway into it was cunning. I would have expected nothing less from Edward Cullen.

I withdrew my arms from my face ready for battle. "No, not damaging. To be quite frank, you don't sound ready to talk about it if you're going to have this attitude." I wasn't fighting fair, but it was hard to have any real meaningful discussion with a rare sighting of cold and broody Edward.

"I get to feel this way, Jessica. You just put an expiration date on our relationship," Edward commented icily. I ceased my path forward. We were no longer walking toward the unknown. We were walking through hell. A hell I created for my own selfish but understandable reasonings to want a _normal life_. He was the immovable object and I was the unstoppable force. We were destined to collide. But who would win? In the end it had to be me. I would not compromise the possibility of seeing the Smith's in the afterlife for Edward. I wondered if he knew that _tidbit_, he would be more willing to let me go.

"There was always an expiration date since I am staying human. I am just moving up the impending date. Whether you get 5 or 65 years with me Edward, in the grand scheme our time together will seem like a grain of sand amongst the whole beach front to you. Remember, forever is a long time." I spoke my words without feeling. I was embracing the engineer in me. Her decree was to be direct and rational in responses. And I loved her for it.

"Stop using your "sensible" reasoning on me and tell me what your heart says, Jessica." Edward's appeal to my heart to be the voice of reason in this conversation was a lost cause.

"I quote, _if that is what you want, and will make you happy? Then okay_."

"What else was I supposed to say in the shock of the moment?" His voice faltered from smooth to something gritty. Like sandpaper. This was a first with Edward. I had never seen him this distraught before. I guess the shock played a part in his acceptance earlier, and now he realized the implication of what saying "okay" truly meant.

"We will just go around in circles right now on this. Let's take some space to think more on it this time and then reconvene." I felt like a judge calling recess and letting the jury take a break from the case. I knew the judge's impending ruling, but Edward was the prosecutor willing to fight longer for his side to win.

"If that is what you wish." Ever the gentleman, Edward always was. I just wished he would throw his passion towards me physically for once. Even in a moment such as this. _Again, with this Jessica? Jesus. Keep it in your pants, girl._

Edward's golden eyes evaluated my own. He wouldn't have been able to detect my lust in them even if it slapped him in the face. _I am dating such a sexually innocent man. Damn those early 20__th__ century ways. I love him. But still…_

Edward brought his right hand to my face and brushed his thumb over my lower lip. "You're biting it again." I hadn't realized I was returning to my bad habit again so soon. The spell he was putting me under with his stare… _If he could just say, "You have bewitched me body and soul" in this moment, I would jump his bones._

He proceeded to advance to my lips with a chaste kiss. I was left unsatisfied and he would never know; so, I bought into to my lust and pulled his face down to my own. I kissed him with a burning desire to let my lips communicate every unspoken feeling I omitted during our conversations today. Although I caught him off guard at first, he blazed a trail to parallel my lead. I felt his want. His desire. His despair. His confusion. Superseding all of that, I felt _his love_. And I knew he felt mine.

In my heart at the time… I ignorantly predicted once we made it through this, we would have a wonderful five years together.

* * *

Author's Note ii: _Thanks for all the reviews on the first chapter, Guys! You're overwhelming support for the continuation of this "saga" ;) is heartwarming and inspires the continuation of this journey. P.s. Jacob Arc Ch2. Is being revised and should be posted soon!_

**Lalaland972's Response to Reviews:**

**KimHdz:** What an amazing review! Where to even begin? I am pleased you couldn't pick a favorite ending! After your review on chapter 11, I hoped your prediction was true and you would enjoy the ending/surprise of three different endings! Each intro in this story was intended to hook you in and I am glad it did! Means I went on the right path haha I feel the same connection with the characters despite being the driver of their stories lol Thank you for commenting on my writing progression. I was so thrilled reading that, the next morning I bought a thesaurus app for my phone thinking, "I can do better". I hadn't noticed it originally, but I went back and reread some chapters and I agree. Reviews such as yours encourage me to get better and become more fearless in my writing. Thank you for being a champion of me and my stories. If I ever do end up writing a personal story, I'll be sure to share the title! :) p.s. you're right! I strive to be consistent and you'll see hints of that in these chapters to come. Even though each story is a different path for Jessica, you'll see overlaps in small things. One should be obvious in the next chapter of the Jacob Arc. Thank you for the reviews! A review such as this drives me forward in my story telling. Jacob's chapter and the friendship one will be posted as well, very soon :)

**Arwengeld:** Glad you found the set-ups interesting! The sequel should take us on a crazy ride AND we will see more time from non-main characters!

**Stelbeltm13:** Thank you! I am excited as well for each adventure to continue :)

**DxGRAYxMAN:** Lol! (Edward Arc) She may be a bit naive. She is SO sure the Volturi aren't coming, but are they?! (Jacob Arc) not intentionally at least! But he is confused. I think we will get more clarity in the future :0

**CasJeanne:** I read. I thought. I decided. I am updating one chapter at a time to each arc. If I could write one arc all at once and then start the next, I would. But my focus is equally split! Thank you for joining me on this sequel!

**Treasure89:** I know! Gotta stir it. I live for the Drama! Haha (Edward Arc) interesting theories. I think _one_ of them is the warmest. But can't say which :) I can say that it will be a WILD ride. And what I have planned is like...giving me chills hahaha! (Jacob Arc) The Jacob Arc was the first one I wrote! It kept playing around in my head all weekend. Then I thought, what the hell. Let's see what I write. Then when I finished, I wanted to see where they would go as well. I went back and forth on this plot but decided the direction I wanted to go with it fit best. You'll see Katie/Jessica needing to learn a lot of hard lessons in this story. (Friendship arc) I don't see there being a feud right now. I think Bella trumps Edward/Jacob to Jessica for the time being. She knows her secret and they battled against Victoria together. Now while Jessica might be team Bella, Bella might suffer through some misgivings if she figures out the Twilight guys don't only have eyes for her... I am living for these chapter two installments. I hope they live up to others as they do in my head!

**Hmz0975:** Glad you loved all three starts! :D Edward's did have a sad start :( but we will see what happens! And the imprinting was another wrench thrown in a happy ending for Jessica :( as for your friendship ending questions, maybe:) is my answer to both!

**Angelacorus:** I know! I am terrible! :( but don't give up hope!

**Wpear:** No more three in one! :) Glad you're happy for more!

**Anna:** Interesting theory. You are spot on about Edward's feelings being consistent in all three endings. As for the rest...you'll have to wait and see to find out :) thank you for your review and your sleuthing/theory!

**Guest1:** Bingo! I wonder too! Could cause some interesting trouble for our protagonist:)

**Guest2:** Glad you liked all three! Friendship Arc ch 2 will be posted soon after Jacob Arc. Hope it continues being your fave :)

**Guest3:** Done! I thought I had them picked when I originally posted. Thanks for catching that and pointing it out to me:)

**Brankel1:** Yay! Thanks for the review!


	3. Jacob Arc Ch 2

**Jessica's Happily Ever After?**

_Sequel to "But Why am I Jessica?"_

_Author's Note i__: Told you I would post **SOON**! Friendship Ch2 still has a lot of kinks to work out, so be patient for that one :) Written while listening to "Death by a Thousand Cuts – TaySwift on repeat lol Read Author's Note ii for some "Fun Facts" about Katie/Jessica + response to reviews!_

* * *

**Chapter 2**

**[Jacob Arc]**

"**A Million Steel Cables or Roots?"**

I found Jacob's brown eyes searching my own in the moonlight streaking through my window. He had to wonder how I guessed he had imprinted on Renesmee. He was concerned. Confused. **Devastated**. Everything on his face portrayed a boy caught in a maze looking for the correct exit. He had only two options. Me or Renemsee. But only I knew it was no competition. I was never supposed to be an exit. Just an obstacle on his way to her. I needed to rip the pages I self-inserted in this book. Now. _Just rip it off like a band aid, Jessica. _

"Jacob-"

"Jessie?" I heard Daniel's voice whine outside of my bedroom door. Jacob knew the drill without me needing to say anything, he was gone in a flash. Our conversation was on pause. The flame of our love was still flickering when I was just about to douse it out.

I walked toward the door and opened it slowly to see a frightened Daniel in my view. A different concern now worked its way into my heart. "Daniel, what's wrong?"

"I dreamed...you left us. **Forever**. You had a different family waiting for you to come back home." I bent my knees to get our heads at the same level. I shook off the anxiety about the demise of my relationship with Jacob and put on my big sister hat.

"Hey, I am still here kiddo." I embraced Daniel in a bear like hug. "It was a just a dream." Daniel didn't return my embrace. I started to notice he was shaking like a leaf. _He must really be spooked by this dream_.

"It felt real. Then I heard _her_ voice," Daniel whimpered.

"Who is _her_, Daniel?"

"Jenna." My grip tightened on Daniel. It had to be a coincidence. "She said they were waiting for you. _Your family_."

I pushed down every emotion begging to take hold of my body. _Not now. Not yet. Hold it. _"Let's get you a glass of water and then I'll walk you back to bed, okay?" I hoped Daniel was too young to catch on I was intentionally avoiding learning more about his dream.

Daniel nodded and we headed to the kitchen. His little hand tightly clung onto mine the entire trip to the kitchen and back. It must have been my imagination, but I almost believed he was so afraid to let go of me because he feared if he did, he would watch me disappear before his very eyes.

...

I didn't bother texting Jacob a warning I was on my way to see him. I hadn't slept a wink since I returned to my bedroom after putting Daniel to bed by assuring him I was not going anywhere. His behavior the night before puzzled me. In recent months as he "grew up", he began to seek my sisterly affection less and less. Last night was an outlier in his behavior towards me. _Maybe he really missed me after being gone for a month?_

I put the fact he dreamed about Jenna in the back of my mind as I pulled in front of Sam and Emily's house. As I walked out of the front door of my car, I mentally uprooted every attachment I had to the idea that being Jacob's imprint was _ever_ realistic. The bond meant next to nothing when it was us who eventually chose each other. But his bond with Renemsee was different. It was forced and a pull he couldn't deny. It was also one I didn't have the heart to compete with, and ultimately lose to the steel cables. They had an inseverable bond based on what the book depicted in Jacob's POV in Breaking Dawn. Unlike ours. What was built could also be torn down. And I was about to rip out the foundation seamlessly as much as my heart begged me not to.

As of that morning, I made up my mind that Jacob and I's love story had come to its conclusion.

I walked through the front door of the house with my head held high. Inside I was greeted by Sam, Emily, Jared, Paul, Embry, Seth, Leah and...Jacob. I could not spot a set of eyes that did not behold shame. It was irritating. I would be fine. I _can do this. Even at the cost of losing the friendship with the pack._ My heart attempted to cry more but I nipped it in the bud._ I am strong. I am in control. I am an independent person and I will be fine. Just fine. _

I was partially concerned by the stares, that my reassuring words of self-encouragement were not conveyed on my face. "Jacob, can we talk outside?" I asked calmly. Jacob glanced over to Sam. Sam nodded to Jacob. I wasn't sure if it was a nod of encouragement, or if I had just interrupted a meeting and he was given the okay to leave.

Jacob sat up from the couch and cautiously walked toward me and pushed open the front door to lead us to our privacy outside. I noted he didn't take my hand. Offer me a smile. Or make some joke about my bad timing. It confirmed to myself I was making the right decision.

We ignored the eyes carefully peeking between the curtains shading the living room window from our view. They were not as subtle as I am sure they had believed they were. _Sigh. __Now everyone gets to witness the show._

I took in my last look of Jacob through the eyes as his girlfriend before I began.

"The first imprint must have been wrong. If you could do it again, I mean. We should just call quits on this relationship while we are ahead. We know how an imprint will work." We didn't, but I needed to sound confident. "This one with Renesmee surely will erase or override the one on me."

"She's a _baby_ for crying out loud, Jessica." Jacob's frustration was something I expected. I knew this would not be easy. But it would be doable. Jacob lacked relationship experience to know how real what we had was. It will still be wiped out by Renesmee though.

"For now. She will grow up, and what may seem like caring for her now will grow into something undeniable that will eclipse what we have. You will leave me behind sooner or later. I won't let you do that to me. It's my choice to end this."

"What about _my choice, _Jessica? **I love you**. Yes, this is weird, **and** unheard of. Nothing with us has been normal for Quileute history of imprints. But we make it work. We can make it through this. You just need to give me time." Jacob's tone overlapped between bitterness and begging. It was not enough to sway me though.

"Since it occurred, you have _already _been different towards me. I have picked up on every hint. Do you expect me to endure this and to pretend everything is okay when it's not?"

"I know!" He shouted angrily in defeat. I shrank back from him in response. Jacobs eye's widened in horror as he realized I was afraid of him for a brief moment.

"Sorry," he admitted softly as he attempted to reach for my hand. I took another step back to separate us further despite the pull wanting to propel me in his arms and cry. I was the source of Jacob's distress as he ran his fingers threw his ebony locks.

"My heart is _yours_, Jessica." Unfortunately for Jacob, his tone made me doubt his certainty.

"It doesn't seem its yours to give out, Jacob." I looked Jacob dead in the eyes as I spoke the truth I knew in my heart as soon as Edward told me Renesmee had been born.

"Don't give up on me, Jessica. I didn't give up on you." He was right. He was 100% right. It was a mistake though. _All of it_. A beautiful mistake that will provide me memories I'll always treasure.

"It's not about giving up, Jacob. The trust I had in you and us is broken. You have a new person now. That must be how imprinting works in a case like ours. Your bond must be destined to be stronger than ours." I gave him too much. And in the end, it was not enough to make me his sole imprint. _Just a dumb glitch in the storyline progression. I will be fine. _

"It would be best going forward if you gave me space. I don't know if we can be friends again, Jacob. But let's see what the future holds if our paths cross someday. I wish you the best with Renesmee." The way my lips turned up into a sad smile was miles away from the expression I wanted to display on my face to Jacob. But I knew better.

I began to walk away from Jacob to my car. He didn't walk after me to stop me. He just yelled to ask, "Do you not love me anymore?" It was a childish question. One that showed his immaturity still in love to think I fell out of love with him over night or because he imprinted on someone else.

I saw hope flicker then extinguish in his eyes when I turned around to tell him, "Love is irrelevant in this matter, Jacob. Ask Leah. Goodbye, _Jake_." If he knew me at all, he would know by me calling him Jake I was secretly admitting I still loved him. But he missed my clue as he broke down in sobs while falling to his knees on the grass. The pathos in our word exchange finally called for the intervening of the wolf pack to support Jacob, despite Jacob not belonging in their pack anymore. I was touched by the bond they _still _had. I knew they would get Jacob through this time before he realized I made the right decision.

I somehow managed to guide my feet to my car, force my hand to open the door, and convince myself to drive away. All while fighting off the ache to run to Jacob and tell him I would wait for him and believed he would choose me in the end.

The denouement of our love story was not on Jacob's birthday, but today.

…

As soon as I arrived home, I immediately went to my bedroom. I began to pack up all my memories of Jacob. The photograph in the frame from my 19th birthday. The silver bracelet with a baseball bat charm he presented to me at graduation. The mementos from our trip in Europe. I painstakingly wrapped them all in newspaper and stuffed them in a shoe box that I tucked under my bed. Everything we were and shared amounted to only filling up a 12"x6" shoe box. I laughed at the thought. It meant in grand scheme I would be okay. There were more shoe boxes to fill with other "great loves" that didn't have to be forced by an "imprint". I would be fine.

I just settled into that "fine" state only to have it interrupted with a knock on my window. _God damn. I need seal over that window with plaster. I'll ask Dad if that is feasible..._

At my window, I saw little Seth Clearwater. I closed my gaping mouth and opened the window. For once I had a welcomed presence. Or I at least hoped I was not about to be burdened with another difficult conversation in my bedroom given my recent track record.

"Jessica, please don't do this." _I __**knew**__ this wouldn't be a friendly visit. Buying plaster at the store after this. _

"Did Jacob send you?"

"No. He wouldn't dare to ask," he said disheartedly.

"Seth...you don't understand what is really going on."

"But I do!" Seth informed me adamantly. "Jacob is my alpha now. I joined his pack when he came to inform us about Renesmee."

"When did he tell you?" I asked him carefully.

"Late yesterday evening. After he came back from the Cullen's." _So...I found out last. _My heart was already so bruised and beaten after today that it couldn't even feel another blow to it at this point.

"Jacob is not meant for me. He imprinted again."

"Imprints are not wrong. Not that I know personally. But according to our history."

Seth was incorrigible. I admired his spirit and loyalty to fight for Jacob, his alpha. However, this was not his fight. I was the ultimate loser. Not Jacob. That is what they couldn't understand. Yet.

"Leah agrees with me too. She is pretty pissed you used her situation as a cop out to break up with Jacob..." Seth still had not crossed the barrier of the open window. He remained outside. On the roof. Failing to convince me from my irreversible decision.

"_Please_ Jessica. You'll lose us too if you don't stay with Jacob. He will figure this out. I know it's you he will choose."

"Seth, I am tired of being a choice for Jacob. First, between Bella and me. And now Bella's baby? Isn't that kind of f***ed up? Don't I deserve more than that? I was promised that with the imprint, supposedly. But _once again,_ Jacob must make a choice. I am relieving him of that decision. Please respect that, Seth. I don't want to lose our friendship either, but at the end of the day, we are all subject to the fate of the imprint it seems."

Seth's eyes began to glaze over. He was fighting back tears. I too cherished our friendship, but I assumed he was more upset for Jacob.

"Jacob will be okay, Seth." I attempted to be optimistic.

"If that's with you think, maybe you don't deserve him, Jessica." My heart _did _feel that punch. I watched Seth jump off my roof and run off into the distance down the street.

...

I spent the rest of the day only focusing on packing for my departure to the University of Washington. I was overcome with reprieve from my dark thoughts when Daniel volunteered to help me crosscheck my packing check list. I felt Daniel invaded my space for a reason. He kept looking at me with concern. I felt fine. I was acting fine. So, I didn't understand what warranted his concern. But I was happy to spend some quality time with him before I was off to school.

The dinner table that evening was quiet. Swift, odd glances kept being directed towards me from each family member during the dinner. No one spoke on it, but what was unsaid perturbed me. _Why do they keep looking at me like that? I am fine!_

After dinner, I checked my phone in my bedroom. No new text messages. Just as I expected. Everything was going as planned. I would be driving off to school in three days and Breaking Dawn would be on track. I was not necessary anymore for the plot. I was a free woman, unshackled. I could have more fun in college this time around. Date around. Enjoy myself but still keep up my studies. It would be a fun experience I was sure. More fun than the first time, at least.

I went to bed with a false hope I was fine.

***knock* *knock***

My torso instinctively rose from my bed sheets as I sat up in my bed. _Jacob?!_

I fled to the window only to find disappointment. A pale and blindingly beautiful face belonging to Edward Cullen was in my view and not Jacob's. _Seriously, got to invest in that plaster. _

I opened the window to hear him out. "Can we talk?" Edward asked cautiously.

"Sure. Apparently, this window is a revolving door for nightly visitors lately." Edward unmistakably picked up on my bitter tone. But it did not prevent him from still accepting my answer that he could in fact come in and talk with me.

"No phone call first this time?" I asked while he directed himself to my bed to take a seat.

"This talk isn't premeditated." I chuckled for the first time since I broke up with Jacob. I knew I would be able to laugh again. I just hadn't expected it to come so soon. It was a good sign I would get through this just like I always knew I would. Katie Smith is resilient.

"So, Alice didn't see it coming then?" I snickered. He lightly grinned at me and shook his head. "Um, I am sorry I didn't get to tell Jacob before he barged over. I should have suspected Billy would mention something that provoked him to see Bella. I planned on telling him that evening in person versus over the phone or by text."

"It's okay, I understand." Edward was always calm and understanding. Rather the opposite of Jacob who could be volatile and react without thinking first. While I was not a fan of those traits, I accepted them in Jacob because there were so many other good ones he had.

Edward's forehead slightly wrinkled as he appraised my appearance while I took a seat in my desk chair. Edward's fondness to study my form was something I had grown accustomed to in our friendship. He was always very perceptive, but I was bothered by it in this moment. I wanted no one, including him, to break through the front I was projecting to the world and _myself_.

He subtly frowned before he spoke, "What I wanted to talk to you about was-"

* * *

_Author's Note ii:__Gonna share some Fun facts about Katie/Jessica-_

_ She chose to become a Chemical Engineer as Katie Smith because her dad was one. She also likes that engineers solve technical and challenging problems. She had a lot of emotional issues growing up from her grief so becoming an engineer helped develop a logical side in her that she lets over rule her feelings- to protect herself. In each Arc, she continues to study for the same degree in college._

_On me, I too am an engineer. Not a chemical engineer though. My friends who went that path in school I thought were truly badass and I admired them, so that's why I made her go into that discipline instead of my own field ^_^_

* * *

**Lalaland972's Response to Reviews from Ch2 Edward Arc:**

**CasJeanne**: Glad you loved the chapter! I kept going back and forth if I wanted to go the way I did with it. Thank you for voicing that you like it. Makes me feel confident I made the right decision :) Thank you for the review!

**WPear**: Thank you for pointing that out! I will make sure in a future Edward Arc Chapter that we get more insight on why Jessica has made this decision even though she knows there is a possibility of a future of her being married to Edward! I like your thought on it- we are on the same wave length :) Thank you for the review!

**DxGRAYxMan:** I think she thinks it will be different since they are a "different love story". But you brought up great points! I will make sure these are "addressed" to why she thinks it wouldn't happen that way, but just because she thinks that, doesn't mean she is right. She is flawed in her ability to believe in this story that Twilight Saga had been done away with since Bella/Edward are over. AND the characters _still_ have some similar traits that cannot be erased by her existence. Thank you for the review!


	4. Friendship Arc Ch 2

**[Friendship Arc]**

"**Defining Friendship"**

Ch 2 removed. Moved to its own Book.

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**Lalaland972's Response to Reviews:**

**CasJeanne**: I think Jessica consciously feels that Jacob was meant to be with Resnesmee in the long run and doesn't want to get hurt when that happens. But on the subconscious level she did it as a cop out for being happy. What we will see in this arc is that Jessica still has unprocessed issues of what happened in her previous world. She hasn't told anyone about them yet. Even Jacob.

**Arwengeld**: (_Edward Arc Rsponse_) The issue definitely will not die yet. I want to dig deeper and show more reasoning why Jessica is adamant about not becoming a vampire. The struggle is her being able to explain enough without revealing her secret still…for now! (_Jacob Arc Response_) it was sad to write :( I am glad I did it right and you could see why she felt she needed to do it. I feel terrible making Jacob less affectionate, but I think it demonstrated his confusion after he imprinted again when he was not supposed to. That really messes with his head but not for his love of Jessica. As for your questions regarding Daniel...we will see :0 there is a reason that is brought up though. And it will be covered in a future Chapter!

**Wpear**: Not a fan of the Renesmee imprint either from the books! But I figured it was the only thing from the book series that would cause relationship trouble for them. This Arc so far is the only one where I have two future chapters written. The problem is filling in the space between haha and thank you!:)

**Brankel1**: thank you for both reviews! :D Your guess is as good as mine for Jacob Arc comment…hehe Wait until you see chapter three for both Arcs!?


	5. Edward Arc Ch 3

**Jessica's Happily Ever After?**

_Sequel to "But Why am I Jessica?"_

**Chapter 3**

**[Edward Arc]**

"**Five Years"**

"You really don't have to do this," Edward assured me over the phone.

"It's fine," I laughed through the speaker of my cell phone. I wanted to go with Alice to the mall. She had been warming up to me over the summer despite her clear favoritism towards rooting for Bella up until Edward and I got together. What I didn't reveal to Edward was that I also needed the space from him. Ever since I dropped the bomb of our relationship's impending deadline, every conversation following it had been so heavy. We, or **he **I should say, couldn't move past the subject. I needed to have fun on my last day in Forks before heading to college. I wasn't confident if Alice would in fact be the one to give it to me, but it was a welcome reprieve from sad Edward. He just needed more time to come to terms with my decision.

"Okay. Call me after. I want to spend some time with you too. I can use it to help you pack. I know you haven't made the headway you have wanted to yet." I was glad Edward wasn't in front of me telling me this, otherwise he would have caught the reluctance etched in my facial expression that I was witnessing in the bathroom mirror.

"I think Daniel was going to help me pack while we watched a movie in my room this evening." It wasn't a lie per say. I did want to make those plans happen; I just needed to ask Daniel and have him accept. "I will call you after though," I assured Edward. "We can do breakfast tomorrow morning before I drive off. And remember, you are going to school there too…"

I was not pushing Edward away. I was just abiding my time until happy Edward could take over again. I hadn't predicted he would put up this much of fight about my decision over our relationship. I thought he would be happy and take whatever I gave him. Maybe I misunderstood how strongly he felt towards me?

"Sure." The disappointment in his tone was unmistakable. What he was asking from me was not over the top in time he wanted to spend with me. I was the one being cruel. I did my best not to let it affect me as I told him I loved him and would call him later.

Alice soon picked me up in her jeep. When we arrived at the mall, I regretted we used up all our small talk in the short time span of 15-minutes. The conversation that occurred once inside was agonizingly awful. It mostly consisted of comment on apparel or things we saw in the stores we jumped through. Our exchange of words was never the same as the momentarily fluid dialogue we had in her jeep. I wondered if it was because she resented me for her loss of friendship with Bella. I was dismayed at the loss of it for myself too.

Ever since graduation, I received the cold shoulder from Bella. It was not misplaced. Jacob no longer called or popped by my window. Honestly, I missed his friendship more than Bella's.

Fate must have heard my thoughts because not too soon after dwelling on my lost relationships, we ended up running into Jacob dragging Bella into Victoria's Secret. _Oh, good lord_. Bella's movement forward froze when she caught Alice and I gawking, and she proceeded to tear her hand out of Jacob's and cover her face as to disappear in that very moment. Jacob gave us an awkward wave with his now freed hand, and I busted out laughing. Meanwhile, Alice gave us all an incredulous look.

The ice was broken, so I walked over to them. Alice warily followed my lead. I suspected the crinkle of her nose and look of disgust on her face could have been attributed to Jacob's "wolf smell" that vampires seemed to be sensitive to.

"Looking to buy Bella some Victoria's Secret's _branded perfume_, Jacob?" I teased with the implication that I intentionally avoided using the obvious reason they were heading into the store. Together.

Bella recovered from her bashful stance to protest before Jacob could reply. "No! He wanted to replace my favorite slippers that he ruined that were from...Victoria's Secret." Her voice dropped at the end as her face flushed into a deeper shade of red.

"Suuuuuure." I grinned at them both. Jacob winked at me in return, but I still believed Bella was actually telling the truth. "They do have great slippers though and it would be a good decision to get some for the dorms."

Bella nodded and Alice still had yet to say anything. Bella looked away from me and focused on Alice. "Hi Alice," Bella greeted her shyly.

"Hi Bella." Alice sounded more confident in her greeting. Barely though.

I decided to take ownership to mend what I broke between them. "I don't think you both," I looked between Alice and Bella, "have had an opportunity to talk in a while. Why don't Jacob and I buy us some snacks and let you two catch up?"

They both hesitated to accept or reject my proposal. I proceeded to walk off and beckon Jacob to follow me. Jacob thankfully caught up to me rather quickly.

"Not keen on leaving her with that pale face little weirdo...but, I know she misses their friendship." I nodded in agreement as we walked towards the pretzel stand. I was craving a huge salty pretzel to dip in a cup of liquid queso. _Mmmmmmmmm_.

"Earth to Jessica!" _Huh? Did I miss him saying something? _

I drew out my bottom lip in disappointment when I realized we weren't the only mall patrons craving an Auntie Anne's pretzel. We had five people in front of us before we were up to order.

"Sorry. When I am hungry, I get lost in thought on food." I drew on my tiptoes towards Jacob's ear and cupped my hand around the ear Jacob generously bent over to me. I whispered, "They _don't_ eat. I am **always** so hungry around them. Alice and I have been at this mall for three hours already and I have been hungry since the 23rd minute."

Jacob bellowed a hearty laugh as he pulled away from my hand after my confession. "You sure are something, Jessica," he remarked in good humor.

I grinned at him. It was just like old times. The banter flowed and the comedic tone was as present as ever. "I don't know how you stand being around them. All pale and cold and dead."

"I was taught it's what on the inside that counts." I jabbed Jacob's bicep on the word "inside". I was offered the notorious Jacob eye roll in response. "It's true!" I cried in enthusiasm.

"Whatever." _Only three more people to go in line ahead of us. Woohoo!_

"Are you drooling?" I broke from my thoughts on food to find Jacob intensely staring at my mouth. _Am I?_ I promptly raised my right index finger to my mouth to wipe away what Jacob saw. A cocky grin then sprawled on his face.

"You jerk!" I shoved him in his chest. His _very_ hard and _defined_ chest. "**I do not**." I crossed my arms around the front of my body in protest of not acknowledging Jacob anymore until he apologized.

"Sorry. Couldn't help it," he snickered with a bright gleam in his dark eyes. Now I rolled my eyes at him in forgiveness. "I've missed talking with you." Jacob's admission surprised me. I didn't think that taboo subject would be broached here and now.

"You got what you needed from me. "A-game" Jessica served her purpose and you got the girl." I tried my best to smile despite my true feelings of disappointment over losing Jacob's friendship.

"That's not the sole purpose of why we were friends, Jessica." The darkness I detected in Jacob's tone surprised me. I regretted what I said. He was right. I knew there was more to our friendship then that.

"I know. Sorry. I have missed talking to you too."

"**Next**!" The cashier loudly called to us in annoyance that we were not paying attention in line. I flipped a switch to revert back to the mode where only food was on my brain. Our order was processed impressively fast, despite the irritated employee's behavior towards serving us. Four pretzels and three cups of cheese were soon presented to us. I left a generous tip for my thanks in being granted food finally and to apologize for being _those_ customers.

"_Why_ did we need **four** pretzels, if the bloodsucker doesn't eat?" Jacob asked me curiously while we headed back to Bella and Alice.

"Duh, Jacob! Two are for me. I'm hungry!" I said matter-of-factly while I dunked my first of two pretzels into my cup of fake and delicious liquid cheese. Jacob shook his head at me. I made him carry our bag of food for the others while I focused on my hands that contained the coveted pretzel and cheese cup. I was almost half way through consuming my pretzel when we were nearing Alice and Bella.

"Wait, stop." I furrowed my brows at Jacob as I took another cheesy bite of my pretzel. My body stiffened as Jacob brought his free hand to my face and lightly brushed two fingers under my lower lip from one corner of my mouth and to the other. He then brought his fingers to his lips and licked off the cheese from the tips of his fingers.

"That has been bugging me since your first bite," he said nonchalantly. "The cheese isn't bad. You got one for me too, right?" I released my body to a comfortable state and uttered a yes between my giggles._ I forgot how familiar Jacob can be as a friend! _

I offered him one more smile, a smile so wide it kind of hurt my cheeks to sport. Jacob attempted to downplay his grin in response. I could tell he was happy too to be able to have this moment with me. Even if it was the final one, depending on what we returned back to.

Then we finished the last stretch of our stroll to Alice and Bella. Jacob and I exchanged pleased expressions with one another when we observed how much happier and more relaxed Alice and Bella looked then when we left them. We came together with all smiles and soon parted ways when the pretzels were finished.

I felt an optimism in rebuilding a friendship with Bella when she left us telling me she would see me around campus next week. I ignored the relationship drama with Edward and dared to think my future was looking bright.

Alice's endeavor to force dialogue between us in the car ride home did not go unnoticed. _Maybe she felt inspired to after rekindling things with Bella? _I appreciated the effort, but I was okay with being patient until it occurred naturally between us. Before I could tell her this, she softly said, "I don't understand why my visions so often contain you."

I became immobilized by her words. Alice and I had never discussed this. **Ever.** Was I supposed to respond or let her go on? I delayed in offering a response. When the silence still carried over between us, I realized she _was_ in fact waiting on my response.

"I don't know, Alice." Her guess, or anyone's, was as good as mine. Her ability to see the future was the only way Edward was able to fall in love with me. _I wonder what would have happened if she never had a vision of me or Edward couldn't read her mind?_

"Edward can't read your mind. I see visions of you. It wasn't like this before Bella hit you in the head. Why do you think that is, _Jessica_?" _Does she know the truth? Did she see me tell someone about my previous life?_ I was panicking and it was showing.

"Can't say. I don't have either of your powers. Do your visions of me only involve romantic outcomes with Edward?" I asked to pivot the conversation.

"_Actually,_ no. Some are just normal ones of what you plan to do that day. _Insignificant_. You take up 70% of my visions. I know I have been hot and cold with you. But you have to understand it is frustrating seeing you most of the time. I don't understand why that is. I will work more on trying to be a _happy camper_ about it I guess."

My heart tensed. I firmly gripped the seat belt wrapped around my hips. _"I know you are disappointed….but try to be a __happy camper__ about it, Katie. Grandma and Grandpa are doing their best." Why is that popping up in my head now? Shake it off, Jessica. _

"Don't force anything, Alice. I am sorry that my future burdens you with unnecessary images. Truly, I am. But also think about it from my perspective. I feel like I can't hide anything from Edward because he knows what's going to happen before I do!" My frustration was coming out and I had not intended that at all.

Alice's face fell. "I know it's not your fault, sorry Alice. I didn't mean to take that out on you. Things have just been _difficult_ with Edward lately, and it is taking its toll on me."

"Five years isn't a lot of time to us, you know? It will be gone in the blink of an eye to him. Have you thought about what will happen to him when you guys break up?" _I had been avoiding venturing down that dangerous path._

"He will move on. Maybe he and Bella will get back together if her and Jacob don't work out? Or he will find someone else." _I refused to believe he would repeat the New Moon plot of suicide. His love for me couldn't be on par with what he and Bella originally had. They were glued to the hip. We, however, have a healthy self-independence that I force in our relationship._

Alice shook her head. "Do you think that little of yourself as to what you mean to him?" I wanted to sink into my seat and be swallowed by the earth to avoid the rest of this conversation._ I thought today was supposed to be a fun day and not contain difficult discussions!_

"What about the rest of our family? Do you think we won't be sad too?" She asked as she pulled up to my house. She hadn't unlocked the doors and I figured it would be rude to escape despite my hands itching to open the latch on the door.

"I was **always** staying human, Alice. And what about my family?" _Both of them._ "Sorry Alice, I cannot do this now. I am running late. I promised Daniel we would spend some time together this evening."

*Click* Alice unlocked the doors. _Freedom! _

After I shut the door, Alice rolled down the passenger side window. I clenched my fist as I stayed to hear her parting words.

"Edward is stopping by after your time spent with Daniel." _F**k. Why?_

Alice knew I wanted more details. "He is going to read my mind when I get home and will be determined to clear the air with you."

"**Don't go home then!"** I pleaded.

"It's for the best this happens, Jessica. I know you are struggling with this despite your ability to be composed when talking about your decision." My emotions of resentment, confusion, and unhappiness towards Alice in that moment blended together as I hesitated on my response. "Don't worry. I have hidden that vision from Edward. For now. Goodbye, Jessica."

Alice sped off. _F**k._ _I __guess__ I should count myself lucky she at least warned me. _I went into my house debating how to handle my impending Round 10 of "Jessica and Edward Discuss their Future Saga".

**Lalaland972's Response to Reviews:**

**Angelacorus:** Lo sé, la pobre pareja. ¡Las otras dos historias tendrán momentos más felices de Jacob y Jessica al menos por ahora! [I am learning spanish right now but had to use google translate for some of my response. Incase I messed anything up… "I know, the poor couple. The other two stories will have happier Jacob and Jessica moments for now at least!] Thank you for the review!

**Brankel1:** Great! :) Thank you for the review!


	6. Jacob Arc Ch 3

**Jessica's Happily Ever After?**

_Sequel to "But Why am I Jessica?"_

**Chapter 3**

**[Jacob Arc]**

"**A Million Steel Cables or Roots?"**

"- well, I wanted to see how you are doing?" Edward asked honestly. He then grabbed one of the frilly decor pillows off of my bed and started to pull out the strings that frayed off the edges. _I guess he has the leisure for this because no one has informed the Volturi about Renesmee's existence yet. _

"How are _**you**_ feeling after Jacob imprinted on _**your **_daughter?" I deflected with a question of my own. A scowl briefly glimmered on Edward's face as he continued to tug at the pillow's strings. When he made a full turn around the pillow, he gently set it down next to him.

"Honestly?" His voice was soft. Like velvet.

"Of course." I meant it. Edward was the only person to have seen me at my lowest point here in this world. When he caught me in Helena crying over my realization the Smith's didn't exist here.

"Angry _but…_ relieved." I felt the right half of my face pinch to the side as I processed the word _relieved_. _Why did he used that word? Do I pry or let it go? _Edward's eyes were locked on my face. Witnessing my confused state.

"_Why_ relieved though?" I had nothing left to lose, so I pulled the trigger. Edward's mouth twisted into a handsome smile. He shook his head at me.

"That answer will have to wait for now. _But_, I think my luck is beginning to turn around." Despite my utterly confused state at his hidden implication, I almost burst out laughing at how wrong he was for his inevitable future. I let him keep his hope. I didn't want to be the one to burst his bubble. Fate would soon pull out the sharp pin to burst it in my stead.

"Guess it's my turn then?" I asked him. Edward's smile did not uphold. His lips dropped to conform to a firm line of concern as he awaited my feelings to be shared.

"_Well_, I am fine." Edward's eyebrows rose, clearly calling bullshit on my words.

"Kidding!" I smirked and then let my face reveal a tiny fraction of the sadness I had not let take hold on it yet. I decided to reveal a small sliver of my despair to him, but the rest of it would be my secret to keep.

"Where do I begin? I am...sad, Edward. I thought what we had was great. It took work to get where we were, but we did it. _Miraculously_." A harsh laugh followed my use of the word _miraculously_. It was a miracle Jacob and I _had_ come so far. For me to buy into a storyline I was not destined to be in. "Then this happens, and everything is erased. Why else would he be able to imprint on your daughter? I don't understand how it happened twice..." _Because I was the mistake. _"But it just means we won't work out. And that's _okay_. I have never been someone who needs a man to have a happy life. Also, being a part of the super natural world should have never been in my cards." What I really meant was the _Twilight World_. Edward had almost a grief-stricken appearance briefly pass over his face when I finished.

"_Anyways_, it's great for your family. Jacob and Bella always had this great connection as friends. They can now always be in each other's lives." Edward was unphased by my justification and the fake smile I made an effort to look real.

"What about you?" he inquired boldly.

"_What about __**me**_?"

"Why does it sound like your disappearing from our lives with how you're talking?" I had not predicted this question to come from him. Edward's eyes focused on me like he was reading secrets off my face that I didn't even know myself. _Quick, say something! Anything! _

"Well-"

"**Jessica**!" I heard my name being sternly called from my window. A very wet Jacob climbed into my room and he was fuming. Steam very well could have been rising from his body with the boiling anger displayed on his face.

"Edward, go home; Bella and Renesmee need you," Jacob commanded to Edward. I was unsure if Jacob's wrath was directed at Edward's presence in my bedroom, or if his grief over the end of our relationship had shifted to the stage of anger. Either way, I was not going to put up with it.

"_Jacob_, Edward is my guest and friend. You can't tell him to leave." My voice was quaking as the anguish over his surprise appearance would not let my irritation shine through.

"I should go, Jessica. I'll be in touch. I know Bella would like to see you when she is ready." Edward remained unruffled by Jacob's intrusion in our conversation. I would miss the peaceful environment Edward had blessed me with, for the short time we had in each other's presence.

"**No**!" Jacob roared. I was at a loss at Jacob's refusal to let me see my friend. _Maybe he doesn't want me near Renesmee?_ Jacob caught my incredulous expression and explained, "It's too dangerous near Bella. She could want to drain _your blood _at any moment, Jessica." Jacob attempted to steadily explain through gritted teeth, and I sighed a breath of relief it was not for the reason I assumed.

Before his departure, Edward did not hide his displeasure at leaving me in Jacob's presence. But he leapt through the open window to the roof and disappeared into the storm outside.

I waited for Jacob to calm down before I intended to kick him out of my room. I was also buying time to psych myself up for the task.

While I waited, I watched Jacob Black's soaking wet clothing drip on my bedroom floor. He was drenched from the apparent rain storm going on outside. It was as dramatic as you would expect for a post-breakup conversation scene to go. Ex-boyfriend in the bedroom after he ran over through the rain because he had to talk to you,_ despite_ having a cell phone to ring you on. Kicks out the male friend he finds in your room. When it's just you two, his eyes lock only on you. _Yup… My life was a dramatic romance cliché. I won't fall for it anymore. I do not belong with Jacob. _

I focused on everything but him as he spent a minute collecting deep breathes in his lungs and channeling a calm state. I ignored his beautiful dark skin overly exposed as usual. I didn't dare to get a glimpse of his eyes that would most likely take hold of me. I knocked out the desire to feel his soft lips brush against mine and show me everything was_ okay_. That it was still just us in the end.

I did quietly exit my bedroom, retrieve a towel, and returned to offer it to him. He threw me an appreciative glance before he began to dry himself off. I just hoped he didn't think my pleasantries meant we were on track to rebuild what I had just demolished this morning.

It looked like I needed to be frank and not give Jacob Black any hope. I had to steal it and never return it. Not even an ounce. I needed to _push him_ to Renesmee. During my conversation with Edward, the wheels began to turn in my head the necessity of her relationship with Jacob to have the backup of the wolves in the future battle with the Volturi. The Cullen's would stand a less of a chance without them. If Jacob was left dangling between myself and Renesmee, I couldn't be positive if the pack would fully stand with the Cullen's.

I made my choice. It was more definitive now then it was this morning. And I chose for Jacob to be happy with Rensemee and for the Cullen's to survive the Volturi.

Jacob was now sitting, mostly dry, on my bed. When his shoulders finally relaxed and he could look me in the face, he patted the spot next to him on my bed.

I did my best to portray a persona of indifference before I opened my mouth, "I am going to stay over here." Jacob drew another deep breath into his lungs and let out an okay while he heavily sighed.

"Maybe it's better if you go. I don't think we have anything else to say. It's over, Jacob." Jacob clenched my bed sheets in his fists in protest.

"But it's not, Jessica." _Katie. He doesn't even know still. My real name is Katie. _

"You see, look at Quil! He imprinted on a kid. **An imprint** can be what the imprinted needs. I can just be friends with her!" Jacob insisted. I refused to meet his eyes.

"_What if _she wants more?!" I let my emotions control me and immediately regretted it.

"She won't..." Jacob's wavering voice made me realized he knew as well that he could not promise that. He looked over to the night stand by my bed and grasped that I took down the picture of us two that he had the same copy of himself in his own bedroom. I was very thankful in that moment I had yet to turn on a light in my room. I was spared from fully seeing the damage I did to his heart, _again_.

"We both know that you can't promise me that. I mean look at you, Jacob?! Why wouldn't she want more when this great guy already has this pull for her to be happy and safe? You know what I think? She is the real imprint. You imprinted on her at first sight, right? That didn't happen with me. What we had was a _mistake_." I barely could find the courage to utter the word mistake but forced myself to do it. It was necessary. _Give him no hope!_

Jacob insisted I was wrong.

"Prove it. Never go near Renesmee again. Prove to me you can reject the pull and imprint calling you to her." What I was asking was unrealistic and unfair, but I needed to fight dirty to get my point across.

"I can't..." Jacob replied with a raspy voice.

"And me?" Jacob looked at me. "Is the pull still there or did it lessen after her imprint?" Jacob fidgeted on my bed.

"They are both different! I can't explain it." He yelled in frustration. I raised my hand in the air and motioned the palm of my hand down to indicate he needed to speak quieter. _Someone could hear us sooner or later if we keep this up._

"_Please_, let me go Jacob," I pleaded with him. He had been in my presence too long. My heart was no longer willing to let my logical side keep continuing to crush the man I loved even more. I was almost home free if he would just leave.

But I knew he would not.

Jacob stood up from my bed and closed the space between us. As he approached, the wall around my feelings was obliterated. Everything rushed out of me through tears as I allowed myself to feel what I had been denying. I cried tears over the fact I was losing another happy thing in my life. I cried tears that Daniel got to dream of Jenna and my family when I had yet to since waking up back here a second time. And I cried over everything I had pretended I processed and was free of when I was recovering in the hospital after surviving being impaled by a tree branch.

Without the blockade of Jacob being at the forefront of my mind since the imprint, I was slowly realizing I wasn't as accepting of being Jessica Stanley here.

"Jessica?" Jacob anxiously wrapped his arms around me. For once, I didn't feel safe in his arms. I felt raw and exposed and the shield he once was for me was broken.

The tears turned into sobs and my body was shaking. It was painful. Everywhere hurt. Jacob continued to embrace me tighter and tighter, as if he was the only thing keeping me from breaking into pieces, until the door to my room flung open.

Jacob and I were startled by the door now open and Daniel's presence in the threshold. Daniel didn't look at me but kept focused on Jacob.

"**You should leave, Jacob**. I don't appreciate you making my sister cry," Daniel said in a low and threatening tone for a 11-year-old.

I backed out of Jacob's embrace to explain to Daniel he was mistaken about where my sobs stemmed from. Before I could open my mouth, Jacob apologized and left our presence. Daniel went to the window after Jacob's exit to shut and lock it. He then looked at me.

"I knew something _was_ wrong after you got back. I didn't realize you guys broke up..."

...

_**Author's Note:**__ I put off posting this chapter because I was uncertain if I liked it. I questioned if it was believable or made sense. But each time I revisited the draft, I couldn't bring myself to change it. So…if any readers could share their thoughts/comments on it, it would be appreciated. I know where this Arc is going, but I hate getting there right now. Also, I know there was a lot of Jacob/Edward this chapter. I will expand to more characters after this chapter. For the time being, I saw this as the best way for Jessica to acknowledge that she still has issues from how things ended for her as Katie and working in another factor of why she would push away Jacob which is important for the future of this story!_

**LalaLand972's Reponses to Reviews:**

**Wpear:** Always happy to sway a reader to a favorite! Who knows, with time it could change?! :) For Friendship Ch2, I did the dream for fun way to convince Jessica to commit to the class. All her other big changes in other stories were channeled through sad realizations, so I wanted to write a positive/fun one in the story. The Friendship Arc is the only story without an ending and where I really have no idea yet where I am going with it. When I wrote the dream, I did toy with it having a bigger play in the future. But I am open to listening to the opinions of readers on this undeveloped story plot. I have many different endings in mind and having all three stories converge was only one of many. So, I will make note of your comment. This one is a little slower to develop too because the other stories have more heightened drama (at the moment) just because of the "romantic relationships'. But once they start taking their class, I hope you will find it more thrilling again! Thank you for the review and feedback!:)

**DxGRAYxMAN**: She definitely is! Just wait, this plot has some juicy stuff being built into it. I think we won't see more of that until ch 5 or 6 though! Thank you for the review!

**Brankel1:** Their conversation was super fun for me to write. We will see the deeper impact of it in ch 5! :O yes, purposefully did not say ch 4 because that is more build up for now haha Thank you for the review!

**angelacorus:** I hope this chapter didn't make you too much more sad T_T Thank you for the review!

**Brit:** A lot of drama all the way around in each story! [Edward Arc] I will get more time spent on the rest of the Cullens in future chapters and Edward we will be back in ch4! [Jacob Arc] Vaild question. Time will tell! [Friendship Arc] I enjoyed the scene between her and her mom as well. Initially the chapter didn't contain that, but I am glad I expanded on their relationship more before posting. That dream for now is just a dream. Thank you for your reviews on each chapter!


	7. Friendship Arc Ch 3

**Jessica's Happily Ever After?**

_Sequel to "But Why am I Jessica?"_

**[Friendship Arc]**

"**Defining Friendship"**

Ch 3 removed. Moved to its own Book.

* * *

**LalaLand972's Reponses to Reviews:**

**DxGRAYxMAN**: Haha great start off! I forgot about "_Damn Daniel_"! I feel bad for her too :( but, some important things will come out of it! Jacob is being…well Jacob. The imprint mixed with him being young still, I think he is confused but wants to follow his heart. It will be awhile before we see any redemption for their "Relationship".

**angelacorus:** :( ¡Lo siento! Yo soy muy triste. Me gusta Jessica y Jacob. Pero… ellos tienes un rough road ahead, so brace yourself. But if there is one thing I will say, each Arc is labeled for a reason :)


	8. Jacob Arc Ch 4

**Jessica's Happily Ever After?**

_Sequel to "But Why am I Jessica?"_

**Chapter 4**

**[Jacob Arc]** ~Surprise :0

"**A Million Steel Cables or Roots?"**

A foreign feeling of revulsion towards myself spiked on my emotional spectrum. My heart… should have swelled with pride at the fact my little brother stood up for me. But as I regarded Daniel carefully in the blanket of night, my heart ached for another sibling. For my original protector, _Jenna_.

I wished for Jacob to be back here. To pretend he could be my anchor again. I felt myself feel around in the dark to find the edge of my desk to steady myself on. I needed support as I questioned if my eyes revealed my misery to Daniel. If he caught it. The root factor. That for once, was not Jacob Black in the last 24 hours. My throat was drying up on par to wandering a desert for too long without finding water. I feared what words would slip out.

I reached deep and found safe words ready to charge the front line. To bring comfort to Daniel and to protect what I was trying so hard to conceal. More from myself than everyone else.

I found a hint of confidence and re-wet my throat with my saliva glands working again.

"After we got back," I finally responded. I reached to find Daniel's head and offered him a soft pat on his hair as a thanks. "It was my doing though, Daniel. Don't blame Jacob. It is better off for me to start the school year without being tied down. I need to focus on my education after all." The words that left my lips astounded both Daniel and me. I trusted he was smart enough to not buy the bullshit either. But…he wasn't going to fight me on it for the truth. Tonight at least.

Daniel grabbed my right hand that had just finished patting him and clung to it. His small hand felt soft in mine. In his grasp, all the unsaid words of comfort were transferred to me. What he didn't have the heart to say. He didn't want me to cry anymore. I understood that much.

"Do you want me to guard the window tonight?" Daniel asked me. He was offering to be my shield. One I could _have used_ 48-hours ago before Edward first showed up and I was blissfully unaware of the adjustment to my future.

I was going to refuse at first. But when my eyes readjusted to the dark, I caught the uncertain smile of a boy pretending to be a man to protect _his_ big sister. I decided to indulge him. Without explicitly answering his question, I released his hand and stalked over to my bed. I withdrew the top sheet from my bed and the pillow normally reserved for Jacob on nights he would sneak into my room to hold me while I slept. I set both by my window seal. My right index finger extended in the air to let him know to wait. I bent my knees and pulled out a sloppily rolled up sleeping bag from under my bed. After removing the string that poorly held its lopsided form, I flapped the sleeping bag in the air to take on its true shape. I craned my neck to Daniel and allowed a faint smile to paint on my lips. I gently laid the sleeping back on the ground, rolled out the sheet from my bed on top of it and then added the finishing touch of a pillow I would burn the next day. I waved my right hand over Daniel's accommodations, and before my arm reached from one end of my body to the other, Daniel hurled himself into my one open arm. His pintsize arms wrapped around me so fiercely, I had to exert my lungs into overdrive to find a pocket space to allow oxygen to flow through them. I returned his hug, less intensely, and whispered, "Thanks for protecting me, kiddo. Love you."

Daniel tipped his head up to me. He blinked excessively to mask the tears the brimmed his eyes. I pretended they weren't there too. "I will always protect you, _Jessie_."

The kiss I planted on Daniel's head was so speedily executed, he could not have ducked out of it even if he wanted too. Promptly, normal 11-year-old Daniel returned mocking a "bleh" before he wiggled out of my grasp, stuck out his tongue to me, and flopped to his new sleeping arrangements for the night.

Once we both were settled in, "good nights" were exchanged, and I muffled my cries from Daniel's ears as I let my despair swallow me for the second time that night.

...

The beginning of my freshman year was difficult. Not the classes. Freshman year would be my only easy year in college, based on experience, and would be a saving grace for my GPA later in my college career. I was not living my best life. I kept up in my classes. I hung out with Angela and other new friends I made. But…I was living a lie.

The imprint I fought still called for me to be with Jacob. It was 1000 times worse for Jacob's and I's separation than after the bond first formed. My heart ached. Interestingly enough, that ache was a dull pain for the ever-growing pain of knowing I left Jenna.

When I was recovering in the hospital after the new born battle, I sold myself the best lie that I would be okay. What I realized now was, that the imprint calling was an unseen force driving the lie of being content. I idyllically lived in a bubble that I was not aware of. Even when I struggled to accept my fate being intertwined with Jacob's. _Some joke that turned out to be. _Once my eyes caught on to the illusion of safety, it burst. Jacob was split between myself and Renesmee, causing him to be blind to the brokenness that should have taken place when I first woke up in the hospital after being called back to this world again.

I resisted the grief daily. DAILY. My secret was eating me alive. And I knew I couldn't and should never intend on Jacob saving me. Since I couldn't save myself, I just existed at college. Not living. Not living the life at least I imagined for myself prior to heading to Europe with Jacob when my ignorance was heading towards its joyous peak.

…

I was able to avoid returning to Forks until Thanksgiving break- when I had to cave into my mother's demands I visit home for the holiday. I was dreading to reveal my state of being to my family. I didn't want them to worry about me. I attributed my disheveled appearance to my approaching finals. It was an acceptable answer. I was choosing to pursue a difficult major that my parents didn't understand why I chose. The Stanley's knew no chemical engineers.

When my mother was starting to assess my appearance too closely after thanksgiving lunch, I took up Emily on her offer to visit her house. I missed her A LOT after all. I risked heading to La Push to see a dear friend with the promise Jacob was at the Cullen's for the holiday. I hadn't talked to Jacob since I left, and I wanted to continue on my 103 day streak of not breaking the conversation barrier with my ex-boyfriend.

When I pulled up to Emily and Sam's house, I chuckled to myself recalling the first time I visited. It was an unforgettable event with opening my eyes to view Sam and Jacob's bits within 12-inches of my face as they were worried that their fight had seriously injured me. My friendship with the pack from that day on was easy to fall in step with. They were welcoming to me even after Jacob's separation from them. They were like a second family of hooligans and rascals who you couldn't help but love and play along with.

I headed to Emily sitting on the front porch. Enjoying the crisp fall air. It was too peaceful here. The absence of the wolves I almost missed until I remembered that their presence could mean Jacob. I immediately was then grateful for the silence, thick in the air.

Emily patted for me to take the seat next to her. As I sat, she brought up small talk. She wanted to start easy. We hadn't talked in a month or seen each other in person for three months after all.

Finally, she called me out. "This is not my style, but I feel like I need to be frank, Jessica. To quote any member of the pack, _you look like shit_." A soft rumble of laughter tickled my throat. Emily's worried eyes did not soften with my initial response though.

"I just ate two plates from a Thanksgiving feast. Of course, I look like shit. I am about to pop off the button on these jeans, Emily. Next year, I will be smart and wear stretchy pants like Daniel." Emily's frowned deepened at my poor attempt of humor.

_Okay._ I decided to not bullshit for once since I left Forks to head to school.

"Good things fall apart, Emily. I won't fall apart because of it. Despite my current appearance suggesting otherwise. What we lost _will not_ break me. I have had other things break me, but Jacob is alive and well. He will _be happy_. I can live with that. So, I won't break because we won't be together anymore." The truth. I meant it. Losing Jacob would not break me. That was not a lie. What happened to Katie Smith and leaving Jenna, that is what was breaking me.

So.

I did not lie to Emily. My good friend who just wanted me to be okay and happy.

Emily began to wring the hands together in her lap. I was not fond of what the lead up of this nervous action for Emily indicated.

"...what has broken you?" Emily asked me hesitantly. _I have __f**ked__ up. I should not have let so much slip. _

"Nothing worth discussing. I have healed, so I want to leave it in the past." I smiled calmly at Emily. _LIAR_. Then silently prayed to the god of my cruel fate that he or she would let me have this moment.

Fortune smiled upon me and Emily wearily let it go. "We all miss you, you know? Not just Jacob."

"I know...me too. Everyone was like a second family to me."

My body was tugged, begged to look to my right. _F**k. He is here._

"Looks like he is doing fine." I almost died. I was right. He didn't need me. Renesmee healed him in a heartbeat like I predicted. It tore me up. But I was right. I wanted to run away but my feet stay planted on the porch and forced me to watch Jacob chase Renesmee playfully down the street towards Emily's house.

I had to watch. Let everything sink in. _I am the one alone. It was my choice. He is gone. It's for the better anyways._

He knew I was here too. I thanked Emily and promised to be in touch soon. I scrambled to my car to be able to leave before I-

My right foot stumbled over a rock and as I braced to catch my body with the palm of my hands, I felt _his _arms catch me.

Everything came so naturally to us, even him saving me, that I wished to thrust into reverse to take it all back in that moment. Every choice I made that day. To avoid seeing _him_.

I pushed myself off his all too familiar arms, once I found my balance. Jacob couldn't shield me anymore from the truth. The imprint was no longer working to keep me happy. I dismissed my eyes calling attention to his longer black hair reaching his chin and the crestfallen face it gently fell upon.

I walked to my car. Ready to leave Jacob once again. I tried to ignore my heart's need to call attention to the fact that Jacob's focus was only on me and not concentrated on Renesmee who was heading to Emily.

I opened the car, sat my ass inside, and couldn't pull the door shut soon enough to add another barrier between Jacob and myself when he asked, "Do you even miss me?"

I was surprised with how quickly I answered. I had no hesitation as a "yes" escaped my lips before I shut the door and fled the crime scene of where my heart was pummeled once again.

* * *

"_Why are you giving up?"_

"_You promised you would be okay."_

"_Why aren't you happy?"_

"_Do you miss me?"_

"_Do your best."_

"_Isn't the body just a shell?"_

"_Try harder; do better."_

"_Will you be __okay__?"_

A string of questions and accusations bombarded my subconscious that evening, as a persistent figure from my restless dreams kept making me confront difficult questions I did not want to find the answers to while I slept.

* * *

"Jessica." The soft caress of my name in my ears called me from my dream. It was welcomed.

Until I saw Edward Cullen by my bedside.

"Edward?!" I cried in incredulity as I drew my bed sheet from my waist to my shoulders to cover up the fact I went to bed without a bra on. _Thank god I slept in a shirt! _Edward picked up on my embarrassment and turned around. No chuckle fell off his lips. He was here for a serious house call. I gripped the sheets around me tighter as I resignedly awaited the bad news he was about to deliver me. _**Volturi!?**_

My heart raced as I assumed the worst and Edward astutely noticed. He rapidly rotated his body and presented himself by my side on my bed. _Invasion of my personal space much? I will allow it for now._

Edward ensued to disclose to me _uncannily_ the Breaking Dawn plot of the second half of the book. The Cullen's and pack had known for a while about the upcoming 'War', but I was kindly brought up to speed because I was now involved _too_. According to a recent vision by Alice, Aro would learn about _my knowledge_ of their world. What Edward omitted was the outcome of what happened when Aro learned of my existence. _ F**k me! _My presence would be required at the standoff for my own safety.

I sighed when I gathered my smarts and knew I should have expected this. Sorrow did not take hold as I pondered if my end in this world was coming to a head soon. I almost deduced my feelings to be that of relief until Edward continued to speak and revealed an unknown plot twist for me, not in line with the Breaking Dawn plot.

"Alice can't focus on a clear outcome of our future. In all likelihood, we all could perish. With the thought of that, I am going to selfishly tell you something I have kept from you for too long." Edward's cold hand took mine. I gawked as he linked his fingers through my own and felt bewildered I didn't slip my fingers from his hold. I felt my brow crease as I turned my wheels over the justification of this action by Edward Cullen.

"I love you." I felt my consciousness slip from my body as it decided revisiting the questions from my dreams sounded more pleasant in the moment.

…

When I came back for Christmas break, I felt my rollercoaster of a second life was almost complete. I was about to ascend up the last climb.

I did not pay much attention in the meeting between the vampires and wolves I was forced to attend on the third day of my holiday break. I was of no help to the battle and a cheap liability. I was ready to spend my last few days left with my family. Make some happy memories and write "goodbye" letters before I was rid from this world.

When I was dismissed from the meeting, I should have known better that both Edward and Jacob wanted to talk with me. I had ignored them both since I left back to school after Thanksgiving break. I had ignored many calls and texts and was only at the present meeting by persuasion of Emily and Alice.

If they didn't have to hold the damn meeting a quarter mile into the woods at the dividing line of their territories, I potentially could have made it back to my car without any interruptions since I was the first one allowed to leave.

Jacob caught up to me first as Edward was not given the same head start to catch up to me. When I felt Jacob's eyes lock onto me as he prevented my path forward despite being _so_ close to my car... Guilt wracked my body. Overwhelming guilt in that I admitted _I missed him_ and then shunned him for the last few weeks. The guilt was pushed to the brink by the fact I was harboring the secret that Edward admitted he loved me, and I had NO IDEA why and where it even stemmed from.

Guilt submitted to my imprint bond and I made a regrettable confession.

Jacob was in disbelief over what I just told him. Like a broken record, Jacob repeated his question to me as his voice trembled. "He told you he loved you?"

Goosebumps crawled up my arms as I knew that the _he_ in Jacob's question was now right behind me. I backed up slightly and awkwardly stared at the distance between the three of us. Jacob to my right and Edward to my left.

Jacob succumbed to his wrath. His eyes darkened to the point his pupil disappeared into his once brown iris. I was distraught over the black pits in his eyes that were focused on Edward.

"**You** confessed to Jessica? Are you **crazy**!? She is not yours to have, leech!" Jacob's voice steadily rose with each word to catch up to his rising temper. His entire body became engulfed in rage as it began to uncontrollably shake. I became rigid, statue-like as my fear took hold of me. _What have I done?_

I had never seen Jacob this enraged.

Ever.

_**No!**__ I am NOT a statue._ I refused to stay immobile. Petrified.

I, Katie, was like water. Resilient. I kept running. Persistently carving my _own_ path. Even a statue made of stone could eventually be eroded away. Water was not scared of fire. It drowned the blaze.

Every time.

"Jacob, I am no ones! I belong to myself!" I lashed out in indignation. I had to point out I was not property to be had by one of these two male twilight character leads. My fury could not match Jacob's though.

"Stay out of _this_, Jessica. This is between me and him. First Bella, and now _Jessica_? You don't get them both, Edward!" Jacob stalked dangerously close to Edward.

_Did Jacob just put me and BELLA in the same category of importance to him? Romantically?!_

"You **stole** the girl I loved from me and my daughter with _your imprinting_. You don't get to count me out of this race for her heart, Jacob. I backed off after you imprinted on Jessica. You forfeited my chivalry after you imprinted on Renesmee," Edward replied venomously to Jacob's accusation.

"**No**!" I shouted between them both as I stepped between the closing space between Edward and Jacob. I placed a hand on each of their chests and shoved them both away from each other to no avail. "I will not have this _stupid_ **Twilight level** drama shit to put up with. **No to you both! **Edward, _you have Bella_. Jacob, _you have Renesmee_. I am withdrawing from this f**ked up love triangle that shouldn't even exist in the first place!" I flipped them both the bird to emphasize my message before I ran to my car and proceeded to drive home.

I thoughtlessly let my concerns over the recent drama leave me distracted while I was driving. My inattention to my surroundings as I drove myself home was just as dangerous as texting while driving.

I found myself realizing too late I was running through a stop sign as I felt the impact of the car also crossing the intersection ram into the driver's side of my vehicle.

* * *

_Author's Note:_

_So yeah…not Edward's ch 4 first this time. Surprise? __**Sorry!**__ Struggling hard with Edward Arc ch4 but feel good about the chapter(s) direction after that. Also, didn't expect this chapter to go on for so long… Hope you guys liked it? – Lalaland972_

_Lalaland972's response to reviews:_

**brankel1**: Glad one person loved friendship ch 7! Haha thank you for the reviews :)


	9. Edward Arc Ch 4

**Jessica's Happily Ever After?**

_Sequel to "But Why am I Jessica?"_

**Chapter 4**

**[Edward Arc]**

"**Five Years"**

Instead of Edward sitting across from me in the booth at my favorite diner in Forks for breakfast…I had the _pleasure _of his mother's company.

I stared at the beautiful creature across from me. Her caramel colored hair perfectly waved down her shoulders and highlighted her strained smile. Her heart shaped face normally gave off a warm and loving vibe. This morning, something else radiated off of it. I couldn't put my finger on what it was. But I was sure by the time I left the diner, I would know.

Edward and I had canceled our plans this morning because we both needed time to cool off from the heated words I said last night. I needed to remind myself I was not a bad person for doing what I thought was best for me, and Edward needed to recover from the tongue lashing I gave him. It was an ugly war of words I did not want to repeat anytime soon.

After Edward's departure, Esme called to take Edward's place for breakfast. She wanted to see me off. I blamed Alice for giving her the opening but assumed Esme was full of good intentions. Keyword, _assumed_. Now I had a different hunch about why Esme was really sitting in front of me twisting the wedding ring on her ring finger. I idly played with the straw in my orange juice as I waited for her to kick things off.

Esme finally forced her words out when she stopped twisting her wedding ring. "Jessica, you should have not accepted Edward's feelings if this is the route you intended to go down with him." My hand stilled and the orange juice was finally left in peace from the rotation of my straw. I squeezed my eyes shut. _Did this just happen?_

I re-firmed my grip on my straw and had an order to it this time. Clockwise strokes along the rim of my glass were being performed at a pace that was acceptable to not allow any liquid splash from my glass. _1,2 3,4,5, 6…_ I counted my rotations until I felt in control of myself. This was Edward's mother I was about to have a frank discussion with after all.

"I know you have more to say. Please say your peace before I respond. And after that, this conversation is over Esme. I'll indulge you because your Edward's mom, but Edward and mine's relationship is between the two of us. Now please, continue." I weighed the pros and cons of my bold move internally as Esme resumed twisting her wedding ring again.

Esme lifted the hand responsible for playing with her wedding ring during this conversation. She tapped her index finger against her perfect shaped pout as her eyebrows pulled downward. For this first time in the time I had known Esme, I was not regarding her as beautiful. Her conflicted nature made her look human. And to be human was a downgrade in the looks department.

"Fair enough. To be blunt, if there was a reset button, I would wish that you never wound up in our lives. Bella wanted to be with Edward forever. Yes, Edward didn't want that and wished to be with her in her human life. We _all_ knew something would eventually change and then Edward would keep his mate for eternity. We would _all_ be together. Edward threw away that for you and all you want to give him his five years?!" Esme's voice was dripping in her resentment towards me. I remained mute though. I knew she wasn't done airing her grievances with me.

"He deserves better than that, Jessica. You cannot give him what he deserves. That is a _lifetime _mate. He will be **crushed** in five years or whatever your human life span ends up being if you cave in to spend the rest of it with him. Let him go _now_. He could still mend things with Bella before things go far with Jacob. Bella would take him back because she loves him far more than you are obviously capable of." Her words _should_ have felt like a slap in the face to me. My pride _should_ have been wounded, and I _should_ have defended my love for Edward and _why_ I deserved to remain human.

Instead, I went another route. "Esme, you are Edward's mother. I respect you for that. You want to protect him and for him to have a happy life with his mate. Edward was more than free to choose that path and stick with Bella. He never had to confess to me his feelings. **But**, he did."

I stopped swirling my straw and took a lengthy sip of my orange juice. Esme's eyes kept their cold stare. "Everyone in your family knows that life can deal you some shitty hands. We all have had our fair share to endure. Your family is supportive and so loving. I know without a doubt that Edward will be okay in five years with that support. I believe in love. Love for my family, friends and Edward. My world does not revolve around Edward. He knows that and accepts it. He doesn't accept my current decision about our future, but I know in time he will. We want what is best for each other. He will want me to be happy, and I know he will be happy with someone else after our time in each other's lives are over. As long as he wants me during these five years, I am not giving him up. My love is different than Bella's, yes. But that doesn't mean it is not any less real or as strong for Edward. And the only one who needs to believe that _is _Edward."

"Food's here, chicas," our waitress sang off-key on purpose. I smiled reassuringly at her brave attempt to interrupt us with my french toast plate.

"I think we are done here-"

My words cut short as my eyes darted to Alice's dark hair storming through the front door of the diner. Boy did she make an entrance as she stomped over to her mother's side of our booth.

"_Esme_, you are lucky I came here before Edward saw what I saw," Alice kept her voice level while her eyes betrayed her fury despite the tightness in her face. Esme raised her eyebrows and scooted out of the booth to make her exit out of the diner. Alice avoided making eye contact with me.

"Jessica, I am so-" I raised my hand in the air and cut off Alice mid-sentence. "I understand where she is coming from. Please don't apologize for her. She is worried about Edward. I will do my best to make sure he is ready for it when our time together comes to an end." I smiled tiredly at Alice and she just blinked at me like she was broken and could not find the pause button to stop the damn blinking.

"I am going to start eating my breakfast now. I do have a departure time to keep on schedule with my parents. You can stay if you like, if you can be good company, or you can take your leave."

Alice had a carefully blank face as she considered my offer. She slid in the seat once occupied by Esme. I then got to enjoy a pleasant breakfast with a member of the Cullen family as I originally had been hoping for.

When I was back home, I had a peaceful thirty minutes to enjoy before we were hitting the road. I wasn't sure what I wanted to do with my time, but I knew being in my own solitaire company was very welcomed. I jumped on my bed and sprawled my limbs to indulge in the space offered by a queen size mattress. I would whole heartedly miss this at school. I closed my eyes to enjoy my peace.

"Emmett, don't you dare break the window. We can just knock," a feminine voice hissed outside my bedroom window. I sighed.

"Come on Rose, you ruined the surprise. She knows we are here now. _Knock, Knock,_ Jessica. Mind helping a brother out and opening the window for us? Unless you prefer to see a feat of my strength that does not require your assistance with said window."

"We have a front door," I grumbled as I walked over to my window.

I felt myself hesitate from unlocking the window latch and dealing with more Cullens today as I looked upon their faces. Emmett was sporting a wicked grin while Rosalie offered me a weak smile. My lips pursed and I pondered if this was worth my time. I _could_ grab the ear plugs stuffed in my night stand to drown them out, but still could risk Emmett making good on his Plan A entrance option.

I exhaled loudly for the theatrics of my unpleased mood with their unannounced visit and opened the damn window.

I backed up to allow them in. Emmett and Rosalie were now in front of me and I told them they had 25 minutes of my time before I was heading off to school.

"Alice told us what happened," Rosalie started off.

"Don't be mad at Esme, please. She was just doing what she thought was best for Edward." Emmett was serious for once and I didn't like it.

"Also, don't let that conversation guilt you into choosing to become a vampire. This life is not worth it. Even for, Edward." Rosalie purposefully avoided looking at Emmett. I did though and his expression grew sour.

I pinched the bridge of my nose between my eyebrows and wondered if I could be given a damn break for once from this family.

"Emmett, she is forgiven. I understand why she felt she needed to say what she did. Water under the bridge. Rosalie, I am still team human. We good?" Both pairs of golden eyes watched me intently. I wasn't sure what they were trying to discern. I meant every word I said. I reluctantly offered them both hugs to assure them I meant everything I said. Rosalie didn't return my hug, but Emmett squeezed the life out of me for the hell of it.

I directed my eyes to the window to subtly invite them to make their exit. They both lingered because they didn't catch my drift or had more to say. _What is it now?_

Emmett cleared his throat before speaking. "Can you sell this to Edward? He is probably just finding out about now." I smirked as I had come to an understanding of what they really needed from me. I wasn't a bitch, of course I would make sure Edward would forgive Esme sooner rather than later. I valued what family means and what Edward's family meant to him.

I smiled proudly before saying, "Of course I will. Guys, it will be okay. This will blow over. I will make sure Edward understands I am okay, and it didn't affect us as long as he chooses to still be with me."

Rosalie looked at Emmett with a strained expression. Emmett's mouth faltered to a frown. "Alice was right," Rosalie whispered to Emmett, ignoring me. Emmett crossed his arms around his broad chest and nodded.

"Look, Jessica, Edward _loves_ you."

"I know that, Emmett."

"Do you though? Because I think if you understood you wouldn't be so calm about handling Edward after what Esme just pulled." I scoffed at them both. _Why does everyone think I underestimate how Edward feels about me? What am I missing here?_

"Edward will **want** to fix it. Because I won't accept him losing a relationship with one his family members because of me. That is non-negotiable. I would find that unacceptable and Edward's knows me and knows this. He understands what my family means to me. So, I think you guys are not giving him enough credit."

"Stop being so arrogant, Jessica," Rosalie snapped at me. "You haven't been with him but a couple months and you got him more twisted up with his love for you then Bella ever did. We are his family, yes. But you are his mate, his _true _mate. Not Bella. He will go crazy knowing Esme pulled this shit. He will go ever crazier when you break up with him in your "Five Year" rule. Stop bullshitting yourself that you and he will be okay when you call it off. **We don't for a second buy it**. He, however, is starting to buy it that you will be okay and it is eating him up. Stay human but acknowledge he loves you and this is going to kill him when you guys are over. Whether he has the support of _his family_ or not."

My body began to tremble. My rage had grown with every one of Rosalie's acidic words. They didn't know me. Everything was my fault to them. I didn't ask for this. I didn't ask for Edward's love.

"Get out, **now**!" Rosalie and Emmett were caught off guard by my reaction despite the buttons they pushed to rise it out of me. "**Seriously, get the f**k out.**" I stormed to my window and pointed them to their exit. I could not forcibly make them exit, but to my relief they took their leave.

Rosalie meekly apologized for possibly overstepping as they crossed my window and hopefully went back home. I looked at the clock on my wall. I only have 10 minutes left. I shut and locked my window and flopped onto my bed. No longer able to channel an inner peace, I instead looked for the reasons I had to wish for a normal life. _Jenna. The Smiths. I have to do my best for them. And I want to see them all again. In the afterlife. I will not be bullied into anything less than I deserve for this second chance at life. Not even for Edward's love. As great for me as it might be. __It will not be enough._

* * *

_**Author's Note:**__ This was originally not chapter 4. I had a whole different chapter 4, then I thought of the challenge to myself to incorporate other twilight characters and this chapter came to mind. The previous version of chapter 4 will be making its guest appearance in chapter 5, __ -Lalaland972_

* * *

**Lalaland972's Response to Reviews:**

**silentmayham:** Yes A LOT of crazy stuff went down. I think a lot of you concerns about why what happened should be answered in ch 5 which I have already written. Actually, your review inspired me to be a little more forthcoming about what went on behind the scenes that Jessica wasn't privy too that let to other character's actions. I hope you'll let me know when that chapter is posted what your thoughts are on it! And as for your last sentence…you will find out soon :) Thank you for your review!

**DxGRAYxMAN:** Ooooo you will find out in chapter 5 the extent of her injuries. Edward did make a valid point. We will also see why Edward would even confess in the next chapter! Thank you for your review!

**WPear:** Yay! I am glad you are enjoying all three of them! Means I am doing my job right. The cliffhanger was intense. This one wasn't that bad, I almost ended it with a cliff hanger I originally intended. But decided to leave that one for chapter 5. Probably won't be as dramatic as Jacob Ch 4s though! Thank you for your review!

**Angelacorus:** I know…super upsetting But! Everything has its purpose in this story. It will still be a bumpy ride but Jessica can do this! Thank you for your review!

**brankel1:** Thank you! :) …She will be- no wait can't say it! Stay tuned for answers in chapter 5! Which will be a doozy! Thank you for your review!


	10. Plz Read Note Friendship Arc 4 preview

**Jessica's Happily Ever After?**

_Sequel to "But Why am I Jessica?"_

**[Friendship Arc]**

"**Defining Friendship"**

Ch 4 was never published but just a short unfinished draft. Moved to its own Book.

* * *

**Author's Note + Ch 4 draft intro**

Well readers...I am struggling super hard with the friendship ending. **Severe writers block**. Unsure where to go. I can keep up my original plan and wait to post until I have it figured out...or continue on with Edward and Jacob Arcs until I like where I am going with Friendship Arc in my story outline. I hate posting this Author's Note for a majority of this update (_but I ended a Friendhsip Arc scene at the end of this_!), but I need to know what the readers thoughts are if y'all care to have input on this story going forward. Especially since my next couple chapters of Edward and Jacob Arc have been drafted. The reason I bothered to bring this up at all was because this could take **awhile** to figure out and would be out of the norm of the chapter update speeds you are used to.

**My option suggestions going forward:**

**One**, wait patiently for me to figure out where Friendship Arc is going. Don't want to commit myself to a time frame of how long this could take. In this option, the reader's preferred path is all three stories are updated succinctly with each chapter. This could be a struggle with other future chapters as well and not just chapter four in the friendship Arc.

**Two**, proceed with Jacob and Edward Arcs updates until I can figure out Friendship Arc path forward. This could be a little confusing once Friendship Arc starts back up, but in this option you are saying you can deal with the chapter jumping in the future.

**Three**, you are saying "I don't care. Do whatever you want, author."

**Four**, like option three but doesn't care to post a review for input that "I am with option three".

I'll take all input into consideration. And if no one cares to comment, I'll just choose the path I want to proceed with.

Just so I don't feel like a **total shmuck** with this author's note, here is a **ROUGH draft** of **Friendship Arc** **4** intro. I don't know if I like it or if some of it will even make it in the _final_ version of chapter four. But thought I at least should put something out here. Thanks guys! I appreciate that you're still following Jessica on her journey! Reponse to reviews will be at the end! -Lalaland972

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**Lalaland972's Response to Reviews:**

**Wpear:** Wow, I am glad to read that I am making that kind of impact with the characters! :) Next chapter is...**so good** (to me at least) on what I have drafted so far. A lot is going down! You made a good point about if she truly loved him..it gave me great insight to delve into more next chapter. Understand how Jessica _really_ feels about Edward compared to Edward's feelings for her. Thank you for the review!

**Rosemeiness:** Harsh but true insight! Thank you, glad you like the story! Your comment gave me some inspo for next chapter! Thank you for the review!

**silentmayhem**: haha! I am glad _someone_ was on Jessica's side this chapter at least! You made a lot of valid points that I agreed with myself when writing it. While Jessica is being a bit selfish in regard to not thinking about the long term impact to Edward with her decision, she has been through A LOT. Unfortunately, they don't see the Katie side or maybe they could have been more compassionate about it? She still has the Stanley's to think about as well and her friends. She would not be happy leaving them! As of now, Katie doesn't believe in "mates". She thinks you can love someone, but you can also love again if you lost them. She lost the Smith's _but_ has a new form of family love with the Stanley's. If her and Edward break up, she would be able to love someone again thusly. It is not one and done forever to her. Thank you for the review!

**DxGRAYxMan**: They definitely do care about her. I think right now she is limited in allowing herself to think of them as a family because she knows Edward and her won't "last" forever. Or so she thinks for now... She has some soul searching to do after these conversations. Thank you for the review!

**brankel1**: Yas! Thank ya! Thank you for the review!


	11. Jacob Arc Ch 5

**Jessica's Happily Ever After?**

_Sequel to "But Why am I Jessica?"_

**Chapter 5**

**[Jacob Arc]**

"**A Million Steel Cables or Roots?"**

* * *

_Where am I?_

I saw Jacob. Beautiful Jacob. He looked exactly as I left him when I broke up with him in front of Sam and Emily's house. _Wasn't that months ago though? _My car was already leaving the house. _Why am I here?_

Jacob's tears had stopped, and he stood up and began to run after my car. Sam caught up to him and grabbed him by the shoulder. Sam and Jacob were evenly matched in size. Even their Alpha status.

"Don't go after her," Sam gently told Jacob. Jacob scowled and began to pull away from Sam's grip. "You have to figure this out first, Jake. You could really hurt her if you don't. Take some time to talk to the elders and see if there is any knowledge of this occurring before. Be sure. We both know you're confused as hell. I know you love Jessica, but if you want what is best for her, don't go running after her until you are sure you can give her everything, even with this pull now to Renesmee."

"Sam, you saw her face. She looked like she was about to break despite the steadiness of her words. She is _lying_ to herself. And to me," Jacob insisted.

"Jake, if you have to talk with her again, please at least give yourself some time to think. I don't think it's wise until you know more, but I can't tell you what to do. Just know...it never goes away. The guilt. I still have it over the way I left Leah. Keep her heart in mind."

"The pull is equal though! I can't describe it, Sam. It's different than what you felt with Emily. Each one has their own weight."

"Jake...With Renesmee, you imprinted on first sight, correct?"

"Yes..." Jacob responded miserably.

"And with Jessica it was after months since you have known her?"

"I have already acknowledged this, Sam."

"With the vampire hybrid girl, it happened as we would expect. Jessica was _different_...why do you think that is?"

"I don't know, Sam."

"Maybe that's the place to start. Why is she the outlier of our people's imprints. When you can answer that, I think maybe you'll know how things will end up between you both." Jacob sighed and nodded. He followed Sam back into the house with the rest of his friends.

* * *

Time fast forwarded as I was stuck following Jacob.

* * *

I was still in La Push. But…I didn't recognize the house. Just the style of the home reflected to a look similar to Jacob's house. _I wonder…oh there is Seth. And Jacob._ I saw them both in a window through the unknown house I was in front of. The tension emitted from the room was well understood even as I remained standing on the outside. I was tempted to cross to the inside until I was privy to the words they exchanged.

"Seth, why did you do that?!" Jacob shouted at his beta in frustration. Seth didn't cower away from his Alpha, but the dismay on his face was obvious despite the dirty window I was observing them through.

"I am sorry. I didn't mean to say she didn't deserve you. I was just so upset that she didn't take your feelings into consideration, Jake." Seth's despondent tone made Jacob ease up on his current feelings up frustration. Jacob outstretched his arm to rub the back of his neck. He let out a heavy sigh and brought his arm back down.

"I know, kid. But Jessica...she is more sensitive than she looks. She is strong and independent. That_ stubborn _woman will never stop reminding me of that. What she denies to herself is the wall she puts up. She acts like she is used to losing people in her life when she comes from a happy family home. I haven't figured out why that is yet...but I could always tell that she would push someone away if you give her the opportunity to. She expects to be disappointed or left in the end. I had never done that to her, _until_ now. And in the BIGGEST way possible. After how things unfolded for the start after the imprint, she has always been weary of being a second choice. Something she never even wanted for me when I was still pursuing Bella. Jessica has a heart that is hard to hold. But if you get to it Seth, it's so worth it. I have f**ked it up. I need to repair it now. I can't wait like Sam suggested."

Seth's once unfocused gaze on Jacob refocused as he summoned courage for his next words. "You got to wait, Jake. You saw what I saw. She looked crushed when I left. Give her some breathing room before you talk to her."

Jacob slowly walked up to Seth. "You're a good beta, kid." Seth's face pinched together in objection at Jacob's term of endearment and swatted Jacob's hand from his head.

"**Not** a kid, Jake." Jacob smirked and agreed with Seth.

If I was capable of feeling, I would have appreciated the sweet moment between the two.

* * *

Darkness cast over my world. I heard a series of beeps. Then a phone ringing. I suspected someone was making a call. His familiar, warm voice soon was the only thing I knew in the dark.

* * *

"It was bad Embry. She looked defeated. As we talked, she kept pushing me away. Sticking to her decision. Then, I saw something break. She cried like I have never seen her cry before. It was like my sisters after my mom died. Daniel interrupted us. Maybe it was for the best. Sam was right. I am breaking her. I need to figure out things first and know what I can give her before I talk to her next. She deserves better than what I can give right now. I am so messed up with these pulls, Emb. The difference between them is that _I love Jessica_. But I still have this need to protect them both with my life."

* * *

Light blinded me. And I was welcomed back to existence in color again as I found two familiar faces in my view. I began to finally notice a theme too.

* * *

Jacob and Emily were on the front porch of Emily and Sam's house.

"Jacob, I _barely_ got her to agree come. Do not ambush her." Emily's pleading fell on deaf ears. Jacobs mind was made up. I knew it. It was written all over his face. His determined look was one I was all too familiar with.

"Emily, she has ignored my texts and calls for the last few weeks since I saw her at your house on Thanksgiving. I **cannot** take it anymore. I am nowhere closer to figure out what's going on and she looks broken. **I** **broke her**."

Emily fixated her eyes on the front porch chairs we sat in when I visited her during Thanksgiving. She hesitated before walking to_ her _chair to sit down. "No Jacob...you didn't."

"Of course, I did. Look at her! She looks like a ghost."

"I think there is something else bothering Jessica based on our last conversation." Emily began to slightly rock her chair.

"And what is that?" _Yes, Emily. What did you notice?_

"She wouldn't open up about it. But it's not just the break up weighing on her. I am concerned for her too." Emily's voice tinged with sadness should have been hard for me to hear. I didn't like the thought of worrying Emily.

* * *

I zipped again. Through whatever existence, plane or dimension I was in.

* * *

"I could kill you right now if it wasn't for Bella and Renesmee," Jacob bellowed. Jacob's fury at Edward had allowed him to resist the urge to follow me after I departed from the scene in my car. _Would things have changed if he caught up to me?_

"I am trying to fix things with _her_, and you are butting in. **Why?!** You are married and have a child." Edward was about to respond when Jacob's body convulsed.

"**Jessica!**" He phased and was off from the scene. Edward followed in pursuit of Jacob.

* * *

_Dear Jacob,_

_As I am writing this, it is my hope you never read this. That all depends on if I have the courage to tell you this before I die and if you survive the battle. Hell, if I don't die as well there will be no need for you ever to read this. However, I am accustom to life being unfair. __Hope for the best, prepare for the worse.__ So, I wrote this incase the worst happens. _

_**I am dead.**_

_I am scared of writing the truth. My well-kept secret. If anyone deserves to know it, it is you Jacob Black. You need to understand who you have imprinted on. I tore myself apart wondering if I should also tell my family in their letter, but it would be to their detriment to know the truth, I think. What I wanted_

* * *

This stop seemed more permeant. I was weightless and I couldn't see a physical form for myself. Unlike before as I was pulled through time. The only thing I was sure of was that I existed.

I found myself watching Jacob sag back further and further in a black chair as he read the letter meant for my eyes only. I _should_ have blown a gasket when I saw Sam Ulely hand him the_ rough_ draft letter. I _should_ have cursed up a storm of profanities at Sam for the audacity to invade my privacy and hand over to Jacob an unfinished letter I wasn't sure if I wanted him to ever read. I just observed though, reading the words it felt like I wrote a lifetime ago.

That letter was supposed to be in a teal box with two other drafted goodbye letters. I was starting a pile of 'just in case' goodbyes. That box was carelessly on my desk as it was my main project upon coming home for the winter break. If I died by the hand of the Volturi, I wanted to offer my loved ones my final words that I was haunted of never having with my parents after they died. In hindsight, it was a rather poor decision to label it as "Goodbye Box" on the lid. It is no wonder Sam had the sense of curiosity to open it when Jacob asked if he could go to my room and get me my lucky sweatshirt while Jacob waited on me at the hospital.

"She thought she was going to die?" Jacob croaked in utter disbelief. Jacob loosened his grip on the letter, and my eyes followed the parchment with my last words written on it slowly cascade to the hospital room floor.

Sam approached Jacob and softly patted his back. Sam then stepped over to the available wall space next to Jacob, opposite from the glare off the window light. He leaned his frame into the wall and didn't say anything. The silence in the air was palpable. It was obvious Sam was at a loss of how to comfort Jacob.

What felt like hours to me possibly was only minutes for them. I was growing weary of observing them. But could admit being spared more time jumps on my part was slightly welcomed. Sam needed to say something. As if at my will, I caught Sam's eyes gingerly sweeping over the letter on the ground that he had yet to read.

Sam swallowed before finding the courage to speak. "She was scared. We all are aware we are up against something big."

Jacob shook his head at the other Alpha in the room. "She wasn't writing as if we were all perishing. That she would, but I survived. Why would she even think that? Did she really think I would let that happen?" Jacob's voice faded as he began to clench his jaw. Sam eyed Jacob intensely as he focused on the muscles tightening in Jacob's neck.

I understood Sam's concern. If Jacob became emotionally unstable, it could trigger him to phase. No one wanted that. Of all places, not in my hospital room.

"_I love her_, Sam. I love her and I haven't told her for months." Jacob's raspy voice was consumed with anguish. Jacob began to weep, and I wondered why I didn't feel the need to comfort him.

Wherever I was, it choked the life out of my ability to feel. _Anything_.

I watched Jacob cry and cry until I was sure he must have been depleted of tears. Sam stood by Jacob the entire time. Every now and then, Jacob leaned closer to my bed to grab my hand. It reminded me of when I woke up in the hospital with Jenna and Dr. Carter in front of me. The last thing I saw was her holding my hand, but I couldn't feel it. The touch of Jacob's hand I had once yearned for months was now grasping mine and I could not feel it either.

Sam had to soon warn Jacob they had to leave me. My parents were coming back. Jacob kissed my hand and then followed the other alpha out the door. Jacob hastily returned to grab his 'goodbye letter' off the floor. He folded it up and carefully stuffed it in the back pocket of his pants.

On a whim, I decided to follow them along their departure. After, I would then watch my parents hover around my body. I wondered if they would bring Daniel.

Floating in the hallways was surreal as I kept my focus on Jacob's back. We were all outside, and my escort service was over. I was going to return to my room when I saw Jacob's body shift into high alert. Sam perked up at the same time. Their wolf senses picked up on something.

I contemplated if it was worth waiting around to watch or if I should go back. I made up my mind to leave them when I saw what drew their attention. Bella Cullen was approaching the wolves. Bella was _beautiful_. Her appearance that once faded her into the background was now a crisp, unattainable vampire beauty of perfection. I would have smirked if I could. The only thing off were her eyes. They weren't red as I had expected. A realistic brown color contact masked the crimson orbs from revealing the truth to the world. The Cullens sure did a great job with their human props. But why was Bella here and alone? Is it not dangerous for her to be near humans and a hospital were blood was in an unlimited supply?

Jacob had my exact same thoughts.

Jacob's nostrils flared before he grumbled, "_Bells,_ you should **NOT** be here. You are in no condition to be near humans."

"Jake, this _isn't_ La Push. You have no right to tell me where I can and cannot go," Bella hissed. Bella looked at the hospital with sorrowful eyes as Jacob took a defiant stance. He was not letting Bella into the hospital. Sam agreed with Jacob and lightly growled in refusal at Bella's insistence she needed to see me.

"She is the same. Nothing has changed, Bella. We have to wait to see if the brain swelling goes down. You got your update, now go home."

"Jake, I didn't come here for an update. I need to talk to her."

"Bella, she is f**king unconscious." Bella's newborn vampire body tensed, and she hardened her stare at Jacob. Bella emitted a laughter with an edge of spite.

"I know that, _Jacob_," Bella snapped irritably. Bella began to crack her knuckles and tilt her neck to each shoulder. Even I knew Bella was stronger than them both with her newborn strength.

In the blink of an eye, Alice had her hand wrapped on Bella's shoulder encouraging her to return to the house. Bella shook of Alice's hand insolently.

"Give Jessica peace with her family, please Bells. _Please_." Jacob dropped to his knees and begged Bella. Jacob released his anger and showed Bella the broken side of him I had witnessed in my hospital room.

"Bella, come on. It's not _your_ fault. Let's go home." Alice pleaded with the newborn and hoped she would listen this time. I wondered what future outcomes Alice had seen with the current situation unfolding in front of us all.

Jacob's eyes widened and he asked incredulously, "Why would you even blame yourself for this?"

"Don't Bella!" Alice attempted to pull Bella away. But Bella gave into her guilt.

"I told Edward to confess to Jessica. I gave him permission." Now Bella sank to her knees and began to sob. "I hoped Jessica's rejection would allow me to be the only one in his heart."

Jacob's dark eyes widened and then narrowed. His mouth wavered between opening and closing. Finally, he chose to open it again. "You knew of his…" Jacob said, searching for his next word carefully. "_Feelings_."

Bella nodded. "He told me after the battle with Victoria's army. But _I still_ loved him, Jake. I wanted to stay with him. He knew he had to give up on Jessica after your imprint. And we had made so much progress until **YOU** imprinted on _our_ daughter. He was able to accept us knowing Jessica was happy. Then… when she stopped being happy with you after you imprinted on Renesmee, Edward started struggling to give me what he could of his heart that wasn't still with her. Since she was no longer _fully _yours, I feared he would slip away from me by pining for her. I thought if he confessed and he was rejected, he would be able to accept only I belonged in his heart because he finally knew what Jessica wanted." Bella cried. Jacob was pissed. Alice and Sam remained appropriately quiet.

"If I didn't push him to that, he would have left it alone. He would have fallen on his sword to stay with me even if he wanted a shot with Jessica. Because he married me, and we had a daughter. I encouraged him to go after her, so he would know the truth." Bella's body began to quiver. I was not sure if sorrow or fury drove it.

"Then you **TWO** had to fight over her and cause her to be upset. Who knows what she was thinking as she blew past a stop sign to get rammed into." Bella punched a hole in the concrete in front of her knees.

"I love Jessica _too_, Jacob. It is not just you and Edward. She is **also** _my friend_. And I sent her down a path she never asked for. I mixed her up in this world because I let her care about me. I started the problem that led to her being distracted when she left you two." Bella huffed as she kept pouring out her feelings.

"I have to apologize for this, and everything. **She needs to know**. Especially if she doesn't pull through this. I need to tell her. She helped me pull my shit together when Edward left me. Then I stopped being her friend in our second semester senior year. I hate admitting to anyone but myself that it was not just because of the looming threat of Victoria. I _resented_ the attention she received from you _and _Edward. I was such a shitty friend when she did _nothing_ wrong. I am telling you this Jacob because I **need **to see my friend. I **need** to apologize and let her know I will be here for her when she wakes up. Please let me through, Jacob. I don't want to force my way, but I will if it comes down to that."

It was interesting learning all of this information I had never been in the know of before. We all had our own secrets I supposed. I could not fault them. I didn't blame Bella, Jacob or Edward for what happened to me. It was my own fault. I didn't strap on my seatbelt.

After everything I had experienced in this place, I understood _so much_ more now. I was curious to wonder _if _I could feel, would I have felt whole at this point? But deep down, I knew I still wouldn't.

That one same ache represented itself. _Right now_, it was growing for a prudent reason. All these answers to lingering questions I once had, allowed me to stop focusing on this world.

The discomfort was beginning to overwhelm me at the full recognition of what could no longer be ignored. The _most important_ unanswered question.

Whatever I was, I had suddenly become unsteady and enveloped in unbearable pain. Fighting through the discomfort, I faintly caught on to a beeping noise. I wasn't sure where it was coming from though.

Beep... Beep… Beep… Beep… **Beep**.. **Beep**..**Beep**.._**Beep**_**.**_**Beep**_._**Beep**_._**Beep**_._**Beep**_

_**BEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEPBEEP**_

_**[Beeping stops]**_

* * *

I heard everything, but only a bleak darkness was visible.

"_Katie?"_

_I feel like I should follow that voice. It is her voice after all. It __has__ to be._

* * *

**_Author's Note:_**

_Yup, two votes for continuation of other Arcs was all I needed! Thank you **WPear** and **DxGRAYxMAN** for validating the choice I wanted to make :)_

_I was a little weary of the first part of this chapter before we get to the hospital scene...Time jumping was a tricky decision but necessary I felt. So, if you have critiques- I am open to it. It may super suck and I need to know. I may spice them up or revamp in later editing? Who knows. The world is my oyster. - Lalaland972_


	12. Edward Arc Ch 5

**Jessica's Happily Ever After?**

_Sequel to "But Why am I Jessica?"_

**Chapter 5**

**[Edward Arc]**

"**Five Years"**

It was a three-and-a-half-hour drive from Forks to the University of Washington. In that time, only music hummed between my parents, Daniel and I for thirty minutes of it. The rest of it was spent reminiscing about my childhood, what I wanted to do in college and playing car games with Daniel. The accumulated thirty minutes I did not spend preoccupied by my family, my head was still reeling about my conversations with Edward and his family within the last 24 hours.

My worries began to accumulate that _I was_ being naive in my relationship with Edward. I was beginning to realize my ability to love him was in fact handicapped. I needed guidance. I contemplated on asking Angela, but her relationship experience was limited to Ben and right now they were treading through some choppy waters. Aside from Angela, I had no other friends I felt comfortable talking with about my relationship with Edward. To say the least, our relationship announcement together at graduation was pretty scandalous for Forks High School.

After all my belongings were unloaded by my family in my dorm room, Daniel begged my mom to take him back to the ice cream shop we passed on campus earlier. When my Dad passed on wanting ice cream, I took the opportunity presented to me and passed on ice cream as well. Almost all of Edward's family gave me their opinions on our relationship. Now it was my turn to get input with my family. Well..._my dad_.

Dad slowly meandered in the small living space of my dorm room. Every step was deliberate as he scrutinized the future living corridors for _his daughter_. He paused on his second pass of the wooden bookshelf, that was empty _for now_, framed neatly across from my single bed. He performed his assessment of its integrity by running his hands carefully over all four shelves and then giving it a sturdy jostle from the bottom shelf. As he remained crouched over, he murmured to himself, "_I wonder_…"

"Dad, how do you define love?"

Dad stood up, tilted his head and began to rub his chin. The brown stubble flecked with grey adorning his face was hard to miss because a clean-shaven look was the norm for him.

"Um, well what kind of love?" I snorted. At first, I thought he was stalling to answer my question. He made a good point though.

"Romantic." A heavy sigh escaped while his shoulders slumped. _Poor Dad. _He liked Edward enough but still had a hard time swallowing I had a boyfriend. A boyfriend that he saw that could get serious.

"Well Jessie..." Dad walked to my recently made bed and sat down. He removed his glasses from his face and began to blow on the lenses. "Sorry, you caught me off guard. Give me a second." He retrieved a handkerchief from the back pocket of his jeans and began to clean his lenses. It was a good tactic. I continued to stand by the edge of my bed and began to rock from heel to toe while I waited.

With glasses back on and a smile that wavered, he was ready to go. "Okay. Well, love is something that should blossom between a man and a woman _**after**_ a woman graduates from college."

"**Dad!**" My eyes rolled at his terrible dad joke attempt.

"Okay, well. Uh. Can you be more specific? Like we aren't doing the birds and bees, right? Your mom already went over that with you?" I cringed at my Dad's mistake to attempt to broach the topic of Jessica meant "love" as code for "sex". _Yikes._

"Just _pure_ romantic love, Dad. How do I know _if_ I love Edward? To be honest, I think his feelings are greater than mine, and I had been ignorant of it up until recently." I was beginning to regret bringing this up. My mom would have been a better option, but I preferred to hear the advice from my dad for some reason.

"Well honey, love is when you put the other person before yourself. Their wants, needs and happiness come before your own. It makes you happy to make them happy. Times can get tough, but you work through it because you know they are worth it. A relationship isn't a cake walk. There will be struggles. At the end of the day, are they worth the struggle? The fight?" My dad took in a deep breath and exhaled rather loudly. "Look, I like Edward. He is a good kid. I don't like you getting serious with someone so young because you have your whole life ahead of you...but, I think he is one of the good ones, Jessie." My dad just paid an incredibly high compliment to Edward. He claimed most boys his "age" were pigs, foolish and I was to avoid them at all cost. That I shouldn't waste my time with them. Edward apparently made the exception list. This was my first time to hear this. I felt a bitter smile creep up on my face.

"Thanks, Daddy." I approached my dad and hugged him tightly. Discretely, I wiped my tears on his shirt while in the embrace. As I began to back out of the embrace, Dad surprised me by having more to say on the subject.

"Also, sometimes love is off balance. It takes a while to hit equilibrium between a pair. I was more madly in love with your mom when we were dating. When she _finally_ grasped what a handsome stud muffin she landed," he wiggled his eyebrows at me, "she just about caught up to me. Took some time though. Some people just take longer to get there. It's not a big deal. Just means you are like your mom, a little more guarded with your heart. Nothing wrong with that. It just means when you do open up completely, you'll knock the socks off Edward or _maybe some other gentleman_." I lightly punched Dad on the arm as I finally broke away from our father-daughter hug. "Love isn't a race. You have _so much_ time. Take it _Nice n' Easy_ just like ol' Frank Sinatra says." Dad finished his speech with a wink as we heard mom's voice growing louder as she scolded Daniel for eating his ice cream too fast. We both chuckled knowingly at each other before they crossed into my room's open door.

I was _right_ after all. My dad knew the right thing to say. It was just what I needed to hear. I knew what my path going forward would have to be.

…

I couldn't stop second guessing myself as I paced back and forth in my room. Angela, my dorm mate, was not arriving to campus until tomorrow, and I felt now was my best opportunity to talk with Edward. _Again_.

He was supposed to be here soon. It was pre-planned with one discrete phone call in the bathroom of the gas station half way between Forks and school. We were on the same page. We needed to talk. Earlier, I hadn't known what I was going to say though.

***Knock* *Knock***

I longingly looked at my partially open window for my room that was on the ground floor. _No, I will not flee!_

I walked over to my mirror and offered myself an encouraging smile. _Yeah me, I don't buy it either. _

I opened the door to still one of the most beautiful men I have ever seen. Edward's physical perfection was annoying most times, but I never stopped being slayed by his heart breaker's smile. That one was not present to greet me on his face though. Instead, a frown replaced the smile. I hadn't seen that smile in so long, I desired to see one last appearance of it. That was a wish at this point though.

I ushered him in and closed the door. Then the window. No easy escapes for me or him right now.

Neither of us made a move towards the other or spoke up yet. We were both…_uncomfortable_. I roughly rubbed my lips together in protest to be the first one to make any move. I was being stubborn. Then my dad's words echoed in my head from earlier and I hurled myself into Edward's arms.

"You know, your eyes are my **favorite **shade of gold. They are different than other members of your family. I know you all develop gold eyes from you diet. But _yours_ Edward, normally when they look at me, they reflect this radiance of- well, my tongue gets tied and I feel adored. You look at me like you see me." I looked up. Edward's face softened, and he finally bestowed me with my favorite smile. I felt his arms wrap around me and return my initial embrace by ten-fold.

"Since _that conversation_, your eyes have been dark and somber. I did that to them." Edward slightly loosened his embrace and I used the opportunity to pull away from him. I lowered my head in shame before I allowed myself to speak more. "Edward, I have been holding back since you confessed. I have not allowed myself to open up or love you as you deserve because I always knew the outcome of this relationship. I have been selfish. I wanted great memories before I felt I needed to let you know we couldn't last my whole human life. I was stupid to not think of your feelings more. Even asking you for five years is unfair. You will never be on the receiving end of my full heart because I would protect it as I am now. If I wanted what was best for you, I should have turned you down the second time around. I am **so sorry**, Edward. I wish I never blipped on your radar or Alice had visions of me to confuse you. I was the wrong choice." I didn't pick up my head. Even when hearing Edward emit a self-deprecating laugh.

"_You_ are going to let **my family **influence you to end things? _Really_ Jessica?" Edward asked through gritted teeth. The bite in his tone hurt. "I am not oblivious to the fact you've been holding back, Jessica. My stronger feelings towards you are glaringly obvious to me. But, I have had more time to develop them then you have. We've only been dating for a couple months. Even if you are guarding your heart, I have watched your feelings for me grow. You even admitted you loved me for the first time _two weeks ago_. I thought it would take months until you got there. I was willing to wait. I **want** to be with you. More than five years. But right now, I'll take that versus you ending this today over what my family misinformed you of." Edward reached for my hand and delicately swept his cold lips over the top of my hand. I withdrew my hand immediately and winced when I saw a pained expression flash on Edward's face. I was playing out his nightmare in real life. My rejection of him.

"I will only bring you misery. I am not changing my mind about the five years or becoming a vampire. Your family's resentment of me will grow with time and I will continue to regret my decision to hurt you. Love shouldn't be this difficult so soon. From the moment we had that first conversation about my decision for our future, we started a never-ending uphill battle. Edward, you are perfect and one of a kind. Me? I am just an ordinary girl. There will be other Jessica Stanley's out there for you to fall in love with and develop even stronger feelings for. And she will be able to give you what I cannot. Her whole heart."

"You always sell yourself short. It is infuriating. Do you not see what I see? I will never find another you. Nor do I want to. It is just you, fickle Jessica Stanley who can only give me a portion of her heart, that I want. I rather accept some part of it than a whole heart from another person. **I want you**. While I do think you are beautiful, your beauty comes from the inside. That's the part of you that I love most. That cannot be replicated, Jessica."

I clutched my arms around my torso. I was barely holding myself together. Edward was wrong. His family was right. I was the worst torturing him like this.

"I don't believe in mates. I believe you are capable of loving more than one person in your life. I know it is different for vampires or your family, but I don't believe in "the one". If I let that be me to you, that wouldn't be fair because I would never feel the same way. _Not like Bella_…"

"**No!**" Edward snapped harshly at me. "Don't listen to Esme. I know you are not Bella. I chose you. I want you."

"Edward, you once thought Bella was the one forever? Then your feelings shifted to me. To me, that shows me you _are _capable of having more than one great love. You will be okay." _I hope._ "And you will find someone else. I won't hurt you anymore. We are done. I am sorry. This will be the best for both of us." I stood tall and looked him in the eyes as I broke up with him. His stare lacked warmth and was crushing my heart, but I didn't dare let it show. He couldn't know how much this pained me to do.

"If that's what you want, Jessica," Edward's spite was hard to miss. It hurt. But I knew I rather suffer now than do more damage to him in the long run. If I really loved him, I had to let him go. I wasn't changing my mind on five years, but that would never be enough to _either _of us.

Edward showed himself out. When he closed the door, I felt my knees buckle. I covered my mouth to muffle the sobs. I desired to feel numb, but all I felt was the heartache of letting go of my first love as Jessica Stanley.

I barely dragged myself to bed from the floor that evening to cry myself to sleep.

…

I avoided seeing Edward at freshman orientation. I wasn't even positive if he would still attend college anymore. I secretly hoped he would withdraw and allow the break-up settle into its permanence at a distance. It was for the better. I was sure his family would be thinking along the same lines as well.

I was a mess that afternoon and avoided meeting up with Angela. I wasn't ready for people yet. I kept to myself. It was easy to ward off others by dragging my shoulders and hanging my head while I walked anywhere on campus. I didn't pay attention to my surroundings, until I thought I heard Edward's voice when I passed the school's library. I whipped my head around to confront him with our need for space. But I was dismayed when a boy of not copper hair and golden eyes was the owner of the voice. I sighed and wanted to continue on my aimless adventure around the campus. Until my heart tapped back into the ring. It was ready to thrust me back into my sorrow I thought I abandoned in my dorm room.

I felt my feet stumble as tears, not by choice, began to slip from my eyes. I was able to find a park bench far off enough from the high foot traffic path I was once on and allowed my grief to take hold. My sadness was spilling over in an inappropriate public setting and I didn't know how to plug it back up. Until I felt a familiar presence.

I looked up. "Why are you here, Jacob Black?" I barely choked out my words. A sense of relief and security washed over me as Jacob scooted closer on the wooden bench and put his arm around me.

"I heard you crying. What kind of friend would I be if I let_ my _A-game Jessica cry?" Jacob asked as he pulled me in tighter to his chest. It was a little too warm outside to deal with Jacob's heat coming off his body, but I needed the comfort. So, I dealt with the fact that my tears were beginning to mix in with the sweat on my face.

"What happened, Jessica?" Jacob's voice was soft. I felt safe to tell him the truth.

"I ended it with Edward." Jacob's grip on me loosened for a second and then retightened. "It was always unrealistic to imagine a relationship with him."

"I should say I am sorry to hear that..." Jacob trailed off.

I stomped his foot with my own. "Don't say more then, Jacob. I just want to wallow for the moment."

"Wallow?" Jacob's warm breath tickled my ear.

"Be sad. Mope. Anything in the sad category that involves the end of a romantic relationship. _Wallow_."

Jacob annoyingly chuckled, but I was not joking. Wallowing was important if Gilmore Girls taught me anything. Waiting until I was in the privacy of my dorm room would have been a preferable start to it though.

Jacob abruptly let go of me and put his rough, large hands on my face. "Jessica." His dark eyes peered in my own. Something serious was developing in his head.

"Will Edward want Bella back now?" I should have felt guilty about the ramifications of our break up but I wasn't sure what to say to Jacob. So, I shrugged, and he released my face from his hold.

"Jacob, I don't know. I am sorry. You'll have to see what unfolds as well. Just know that Edward and I are through. It's time for me to take a step back from this super natural world."

"Hold up. Are you writing me out of your life too?" I shook my head at Jacob.

"No. Just not bothering to stay included on things outside of the human world anymore. You should find Bella. I am okay now." I lied to Jacob and I felt guilty. But I wanted to wallow alone.

Jacob's handsome face was marred with a frown as he contemplated the truth of my words. "I'll check on you later before I leave. Okay? I care about you, Jessica. I don't think you are okay. But I can give you space. For now. I told Bella I was looking for a restroom anyways." Jacob smiled softly at me and then took his leave. I quickly departed for my dorm room to avoid any further stares.

Once in my room, I was relieved to find Angela was not there. It allowed me more time to wallow before she saw what a mess I was currently. After I closed the window shades, I was about to hide under the sheets of my bed when my phone began to ring. I hesitantly grabbed my phone from my back pocket of my shorts. _Alice... Ignore. _Before I set my phone down, it rang again. I grunted when Alice's name flashed on my phone screen again. I hit ignore. Again. On the third call I finally answered, "**WHAT ALICE**?!"

"Jessica," Alice's voice was trembling. _Is this about Edward?!_ My heart began to race to keep up with the uncontrollable shaking my body was submitting to. **Fear.**

"The Volturi are coming. If you don't choose to become a vampire, _they will kill you_."

* * *

**_Author's Note:_**

_I mean...did anyone not see this coming? This is a wild time to update on a work night but I have insomnia at the moment, so I thought I would revise this chapter/post. We have reached the half way point for each Arc now...woohoo!_

_ The Second half of Jacob/Edward Arcs get more sticky. I mean I hope the chapters come as easily but who knows. I have my outlines done so I know how they end, the trick is getting there :) _

**Lalaland972's Response to Reviews:**

**Silentmayhem:** I think I am leaning to do Friendship as a separate book at least. Thanks for the input. TA is creepy. I think I might scrap that sub-plot in the book… thanks for the review!

**Wpear:** Your questions will all be answered in the upcoming jacob arc chapters :) I like cliff hangers recently. Idk why haha Also, originally, I was going to start off the chapter with Jessica recalling good memories with Jacob before being in the hospital. But I felt it was more important to see Jacob's POV on events. My thoughts on why it happened, mysterious forces/drive by the imprint to answer questions she had. That's all the explanation I got. Glad I didn't botch it though! Thanks for the review!

**MiharuTousaka:** Totally get it! Jacob's is a pretty intense Arc! I am glad it is keeping you hooked. I hope when you start the others you like them as well! :D Thanks for the review!

**CasJeanne:** I am glad you are excited! I really like what I have going on for the second half! Then again, I am bias lol Thanks for your input on the update and the review!

**Brankel1:** I feel the same! But…more shiz about to go down :O thanks for the reviews!

**Rosemeiness**: I agree! Continuing on! I think Friendship will be a different book because that is going to be **a lot** bigger than these two stories…hence my struggle to write it currently. Thanks for the input!


	13. Edward Arc Ch 6

**Jessica's Happily Ever After?**

_Sequel to "But Why am I Jessica?"_

**Chapter 6**

**[Edward Arc]**

"**Five Years"**

"_Jessica, please call me back. I know you're making last-minute decisions on purpose. This is very serious; we really need to talk. I know we're broken up, but this problem is outside of that."_

"_Maybe Alice has it wrong, Edward. She has been glitching a lot lately. Can we really rely on her vision of the future?"_

"_Don't mind, Emmett. __**Please**__ call me back Jessica. I am so worried. I still love you. Call me back."_

I listened to the last of my voicemails from Edward on my phone one more time and then I deleted it.

My eyes slowly explored the freshly cut grass in front of me. Tracing the outline of the headstone that should have been at my feet. My brain was in overdrive, dusting off the cobwebs in attempt to recall the exact image of their grave. It came back to me, slowly.

Now visually pretending I was in fact sitting in front of Eric and Susan Smith's headstone, I breathed a sigh of relief. I patted the air where the headstone should have risen up to and released a hello.

"I know, I am thinking the same thing. Why did I have to drive all the way out here to talk to you both? It feels right this way though." I carved the message "beloved parents" in the air with my right index finger. "Dying at 18 is younger than I died as Katie Smith. At least then I was the ripe old age of 24..." I ripped a blade of grass from the ground and began to twist it in my fingers. "If I do the math and add up my time as Jessica _and_ Katie...I will have outlived you both by five years. I should find some _small_ comfort in that, right?" I looked up to the sky as I waited for an answer that would never come.

"It would be so cool if I had the resurrection stone from Harry Potter on me right now." I felt confused at the arrival of both tears and laughter. "Sorry for the HP reference. I know you guys won't get it. Daniel and I just finished the sixth book recently. The resurrection stone we won't read about though until the last book in the series come out next year... Shit. No, can't think about the Stanley's right now. Anyways. The point I was making was that I wish I could really just talk to you. Why am I here? Why didn't I end up somewhere with you and everyone else in an "afterlife"? Sure, I am scared. Mostly in shock right now. Should have seen it coming. But the fear and sadness will take its hold on me soon enough. Can we all meet this time? After I die. I would like to be with everyone. And then my family here can join us too much later when it is their time."

I wiped the tears from my face and cleared my throat. I kissed the imaginary headstone. Then began.

"_Love of mine, _

_Someday, you will die._

_But I'll be close behind, _

_I'll follow you into the dark. _

_No blinding light_

_or tunnels to gates of white. _

_Just our hands clasped so tight. _

_Waiting for the hint of a spark. _

_If Heaven and Hell decide that they both are satisfied. _

_Illuminate the "No's" on their vacancy signs. _

_If there's no one besides you when your soul embarks, _

_then I'll follow you into the dark_."

I began to hum the beat of the chorus before I heard footsteps growing closer to me.

"That's pretty, Jessica. I didn't know you could sing. What song is that?" I closed my eyes and hung my head lower to the ground.

"Thanks Alice. It's called "I will follow you into the Dark" by Death Cab for Cutie. Did Edward send you in to fetch me?" I asked in annoyance.

"No. I came by myself. No one else knows you're here. It's been an interesting 18 hours as we've tried to track you down since you took off after I called. Edward was not around when I finally locked in on where you went off to." Alice twirled around, absorbing the beauty despite the morose setting. "Ever since I saw you here in my vision awhile back, I have not forgotten this place. Strange." Alice pranced over to me and sat down. And just like that, the gravestone was erased from my vision and Alice took hold of my attention.

"Why did you run away to here Jessica? Edward has never told me why you were here in January."

"That's because he _doesn't_ know why, Alice." Alice brushed her bangs out of her eyes before she nodded at me.

"You sure do like your secrets, Jessica." Alice gently patted my shoulder. She stopped after the third pat and brought her hand to my face. She lightly traced a tear streaming my face that I had yet to notice had slipped.

"Do you know someone who has died?" she asked quietly.

"I do. And that's all I want to say on the matter, Alice." I braced my hands on the grass before pushing myself up. "Alright. You have collected me. Where are we going? Back to Forks?"

"I didn't come here to collect you, Jessica. I thought you might want to talk to someone before Edward..."

She didn't have to finish. We both knew the Edward I would be returning back to. I wasn't ready to deal with that nightmare just yet.

"Don't you have a lot of questions for me about what I saw, when it happens and why you should become a vampire?"

"Sure, to the first two questions. Don't bother with the third. And I am not ready for the answers yet. I just need...to be me. For a little while longer. Then I'll allow myself to become a different me who has to figure out how much time I have left, how I prepare my family to minimize their grief and making sure Edward doesn't off himself after. When that switch flips on, it's not going off again until I am dead. So ...I just want a little peace before then Alice."

"Okay, Jessica. And...I am sorry. So very sorry that this has been forced on you. Not one of us would have dared to even think about you being forced into become a vampire, so you wouldn't die."

"Not becoming one, Alice. **Period**. Now, how do they know?"

"It's a courtesy visit. Sparked by the army Victoria brought up. Apparently...Aro confirmed Carlisle was here. He was informed about Edward and I. He wants to see _our gifts_ in person. You are collateral damage because your presence will become known. Then you are given two options. You choose death. _Every time_**.**"

"Thanks Alice. Can you leave me alone for a while? I just need more time."

"Can I stay? I'll be quiet. It seems peaceful here." I looked up to the sky again. Then back to Alice. Every inch of her skin was covered aside from her face. She blocked the sun with her bright red floppy hat that rippled every time a breeze swirled between us.

"Okay. If I cry, can you leave it be?"

Alice's hand, wrapped in a white, silky glove, covered mine. "If I must." My lips slightly curled up and I nodded to her in appreciation. I shifted my eyes back to the returning appearance of the steel grey headstone and felt another tear slide down my cheek as I pretended to be rubbing a smooth stone in my hand.

* * *

_**Author's Note:**_

_Short but sweet. I rather liked this chapter. Working on Jacob Arc ch6. That one is a little more difficult. Have to channel a sad space to write it :(_

* * *

**Lalaland972's Response to Reviews:**

**Silentmayhem:** I am glad you see this story/Jessica in that way. I have tried to write Jessica as a take on a girl who has hopes/dreams/strong determined will and won't let a love interest define her. That doesn't mean she is incapable of love, just not consumed or controlled by it. Sometimes, it is too a fault though by how much she resists loving someone romantically. You brought up great questions that I have myself asked. I rather like where this storyline goes. It is…fitting. And a wild ride in my own opinion. I hope to keep you guessing until it unfolds in a later chapter! Thank you for your review and keen insight on the recent chapter updates. I hope you continue to enjoy the Arcs!

**Wpear:** As much as I love writing it, **love **to read it more! Lol I am glad it is hard to choose a favorite for you. It means I am consistently doing my stories right for each Arc! Jessica is super stubborn…I am hoping it doesn't make things worse in future chapters. It is definitely one of her character flaws. Stubborn to a fault! Thank you for the review!

**DxGRAYxMAN:** Ugh that is so sad but true that he possibly would T-T I am glad this one still holds as your favorite! I thought ch 4 of Edward's was my favorite to write after chapter 1 for every Arc. But this chapter has now become my favorite to write thus far… thanks for the review!

**Brankel1:** Yay! Glad you liked! Thank you for the feedback!


	14. Temp Story Suspension

Temporary Story Suspension.

Received a Nasty note recently that was pretty hurtful towards my story writing.

Going to take some time off from writing. I guess consider it an intermission since we are halfway between each Arc.

I will be back after some reflection. The stories will be finished. i promise not to leave them unfinished.

-Lalaland972


	15. Edward Arc Ch 7

_Author's Note i:_

_First off, I want to say thanks for the words of encouragement Guest 1 and 2, Silentmayhem, DxGRAYxMAN, Wpear, Ri P Rave, dn831, Stonebridge, brankel1, ferallhey, MiharuTousaka. Your words really touched my heart. __**I spent too much time letting negative words that played on my own insecurities as a writer weigh me down.**__ When I read your comments, they reminded me that one mean note shouldn't override the nice/good feedback I have received. So, I am keeping on because I enjoy writing this. Even if only a few people followed and favorited, I still would appreciate there are people out there who want to read what I write. _

_Thanks to all my readers who have reviewed, followed and/or favorited__. Sorry for being all over the place. This sequel is harder to write because each arc is more dark/emotional than what we saw in "But why am I Jessica?". But that is the reality of "real life" based on where we left off. The reason I ended BWAIJ where I did was because I liked the open ending, and I knew not all my readers may like where these Arcs go if I decided on doing a sequel. _

_Ok, here we go. Story Arc updates in Author's Note ii. __**Please enjoy!**_

* * *

**Jessica's Happily Ever After?**

_Sequel to "But Why am I Jessica?"_

**Chapter 7**

**[Edward Arc]**

"**Five Years"**

It wasn't perfect, but we worked it out. I was driving back to school to make it for my last day of classes and then I was heading to Forks for the weekend. Alice convinced Edward to give me breathing room until Sunday. I wasn't sure how, but Alice managed it. Or she was lying to me. It was pointless dwelling on it. Given recent events that had transpired with Alice, I was beginning to form some sort of bond with her. I couldn't put a name on what to call it, but…it was comforting. She in some _small_ way reminded me of Jenna.

After a long _solo_ drive, I made it to my first class of the semester at 9am on Friday morning, Chemistry 101. I wasn't sure why I was even bothering with wasting my time on going to a class at all, but I craved some normalcy. It was nice pretending life was carrying on like it was supposed to with my whole life in front of me. I was still in the thick of the shock. No signs of it wearing out yet. But when it came…I was afraid of what would take hold of me. So yes, sitting in Chemistry 101 was a grand distraction.

When I finished my classes for the day, I headed back to my dorm room to pack up for my weekend trip. I wasn't even sure if I was even coming back. Alice had not locked down a timeline of what we were expecting the Volturi's arrival. It wasn't before Sunday, that _at least_ she was confident of.

When I walked through my dorm room, I saw Angela laying with her back on the bed with a book extended in the air. She gasped and immediately sat up right from her bed. "Jessica!" Her pitch was higher than normal, and guilt crept up in me when I saw the worry fixed on her face. Before I could respond, Angela was at my side and squeezing me tightly.

"I was so worried! Why didn't you answer my calls or text?!" Angela let go of me and backed up to assess my presence. When her assessment was over, she whispered, "Bella mentioned you and Edward broke up. Did you take it hard and leave? You can't just do that and not tell me. I almost was at the point of calling your parents!" Angela's despondency shifted to fury from 0 to 60 in three seconds when she finished. She raised her chin and looked at me with a hard stare. She had every right to feel the way she did.

Words of truth and lies jumbled together in my head. Confusion was setting in. I was at a loss of what I should tell her. If it was worth anything, since I was on borrowed time anyways. I wasn't clueless. I stepped forward and firmly gripped Angela in a hug.

"Jessica?" Angela managed to squeak out despite my snug grip around her. Everything I wanted to say, I put into my hug. Angela, one of my good friends, was someone I looked forward to sharing memories with during our college experience together. I couldn't tell her my fate or that I was leaving her. I couldn't act like we were on the verge of saying goodbye forever. My hug was all I had. The words were beginning to form on the tip of my tongue too. I didn't want to divulge it all now, but I needed to say something. Even if it was small.

"Sorry, Ang. I was having a hard time. I needed some space; I figured I could afford it since it is only the first week of classes. I meant to give you a heads up, but I wasn't thinking straight. I am back on track though." I released Angela and looked at her face. Her light brown hair was slicked back in a pony tail allowing anyone to see her compassionate brown eyes. Even the glasses she wore couldn't hide them.

Her beautiful face was enhanced because of her kindness. She was a rare friend to have in this world. Selfless, kind and patient. She stuck with me for only god knows why before I recalled my previous life. I didn't treat her as well as I should have. I have spent so much time trying to make up for it. And now I would never get to give her the friendship she was owed from me.

"Angela, you know I love you right? You are a great friend. I am _so glad_ we are roommates as freshman. I am actually heading home this weekend, but we are going to start things right next week. I have some fun ideas in mind and saw a list of events we can attend. I really want to make the most of my time here." Angela sweetly smiled at me and her kind eyes ripped away the blindfold of my shock. Reality was done knocking and bust through my front door. My heart began to pump wildly to handle the onslaught of feelings bearing down on me.

"I'll tell you about the break up later, okay?" I fought to still my shaky voice. "I really got to make it home in time. Daniel is expecting me to help him with his school's science project. Bye Angela." I left a stunned Angela as I ran out of the room back to my car. I barely realized I never grabbed anything from my dorm room as I was running for my life to my car.

Once inside the Camry, I was consumed _by it all_. I was losing everything and what was worse, I was beginning to imagine the damage it would do to those I left behind.

…

I don't know why I found myself here. I should have stopped at my house twenty-five minutes ago. That was my plan at least when I left campus. I had given myself the drive to pull my shit together. _Yet_, here I was. In La Push. On a cliff, gazing longingly at the ocean in front of me. The deep blue water seemed to stretch out forever. Like the life span of vampires. Not like the life span of humans. Or like me, Jessica Stanley. I was walking the green mile.

It had been months since I had been here. That one and only time was with Jacob on my 18th birthday. _What an innocent time that was. _I sighed in defeat wishing I could be in an innocent and naive place once again. For a second, I imagined Jacob was next to me chastising me again for not living enough. He would be right though. I put off my Europe trip with the expectation I wouldn't be going until Edward and I were over. I wanted to squeeze out all the time we had together in the five years. _Oh, the irony._ _Now, I would never get to go. __**Or**__ get five years with Edward._

My gut tightened before I rolled my shoulders forward, closer to the edge of the cliff. Disappointment rushed over me. I was appalled at myself.

I was tired of being scared. Scared to do what I wanted with my life. Even before the looming death sentence. It was time to realize that I had to make what little time I had left count. And to celebrate this accomplishment, I wanted to take the plunge off the cliff before I could talk myself out of it.

"Jessica, what are you doing here?" _Shit. Poor timing, Jacob._

I straightened my back and rolled my chin over my right shoulder to look at Jacob. _Bare foot, shirtless and unbuttoned jorts (jean shorts)? He must have recently changed back. Looks like I have… 100 feet to do this._

I performed a 180 twist of my body to face Jacob. I cautiously walked backward to the edge without breaking contact with Jacob's widened eyes. _Two more steps._ My heart thumped wildly in my chest in exhilaration. I was taking back owning my life. Cruel fate owned my demise, but I owned my here and now. I smiled confidently at Jacob before I held up a peace sign and shouted "**Carpe diem!**" before I turned around and leapt to my future.

I half expected him to jump in after me. _**N**__**o**__ trust_. Of course, when he did the element of surprise wasn't really there. I didn't have to look up to know he followed after me. I focused on the dark blue water and ignored his shouts. I wasn't in the mood to look up and see my celebration of life ruined by a livid Jacob.

The rush, this zest for life I solidified during my fall. It had come too late for me. I would not squander it though. When my body submerged below the surface of the water, I felt at peace.

_Well_, for a moment.

After I resurfaced above the water, I soon began to paddle forward with the current as I attempted to ignore Jacob's lecture on my stupidity from behind me. _I didn't need a babysitter to jump off the cliff._ I swatted his hand away that attempted to take hold of me to bring me to shore. I insisted to him I could do it myself. _We have done this before. I knew what I was getting into. I also assessed the water before I jumped. I am not stupid or trying to get myself killed sooner than expected_. I had a master's degree in chemical engineering in my last life after all.

When Jacob's rant was over, he asked an impossible question to answer. Without lying. And I didn't want to lie to Jacob.

"Jessica, why didn't you respond to my calls or texts earlier this week? You **really **scared me. When I confronted the lil' pale face weirdo about it, she didn't respond. But I knew something was off."

I was beginning to struggle with the distance between us and the shore. I swallowed my pride and stopped to tread water. "Can we resume this when I have the lung capacity? Running doesn't prepare you for open water swimming. Also, quit making this look so easy." I darted my tongue at Jacob between my panting. After another minute passed, my breathing rate began to transition to an acceptable level again to push forward. Jacob was impatient though. He slinked his hand around my waist and paddled us forward at a rate I couldn't even dream to swim at.

"Ah.." I took a deep breath and exhaled with the relief of forgetting how nice it was to breathe without feeling like a boa constrictor was preying on my lungs. "I see you were holding back on me." I looked up to Jacob's face. His white teeth gleamed in his cocky grin against his dark skin. _How annoying. _I stuck out my tongue once again and he bent his head forward, feigning the threat of biting it. I jerked back in shock when he was too close. I pinched my face together and made a "bleh" noise. "You got dog breath, Jacob. _Whoops_, sorry! Wolf breath. Try upping how many times you brush your teeth in a day. Focus on toothpaste that highlights on "fresh breath" in the slogan. I think you can lay off the whitening formula, _Ross_. Maybe for good measure rinse with mouthwash after each time. It_ could_ help…" I snickered at my witty words. _Too clever for my own good. I bet he doesn't even get my Ross from Friends reference. Sigh…_

"Looks like you have your _lung capacity _back there, Jessica." Jacob's snarky-ness warmed my heart. _Much better._

We were at the shore and I couldn't believe my stupidity. I wasted my time on breathing and chumming it up with Jacob without thinking of my plausible excuse of why I never got back to him. _I don't want to come off as rude. Jacob's my friend. __A good friend__. Maybe a best friend, if things didn't turn out how they did? __**Definitely**__ not my sun. I am not sure I have one…_

"I freaked out. Post-break up blues. I took my wallowing to the extreme and ran away from my problems, _Jake_." I hoped by using his preferred name for himself, it would distract him from calling me on my bullshit. It was not completely a lie…_sort of_. On par with what I told Angela as well too.

I walked further away from the shore line and found a big boulder to dry out on. The sun was playing hide and seek in the clouds, therefor delaying my air-dry time. Jacob took three steps to meet me at the distance it took me seven steps to get to.

"Scoot." I raised my eyebrows. Then assessed the boulder that barely fit my bony ass on it. Jacob was not letting up, so I huffed before being reduced to one ass cheek on the rock. I wasn't stupid. I took the smoother side. Jacob was offered the jagged part that I wasn't even sure if a quarter of his ass would fit on. I smirked when he realized what I offered him as well.

A small yelp escaped my mouth as Jacob grabbed me by hand and yanked me off the rock. I would have stumbled to keep my balance, if Jake wasn't there to steady me. He then proceeded to sit on the rock and tugged me to his lap. I rolled my eyes but didn't protest. His legs were more comfortable. And I wasn't in the mood for sitting on the sand.

"Don't think Bella would approve, Jacob." I tsked at him, but still wasn't abandoning my new found seat. _Kinda comfortable._ Jacob's face remained unphased by my comment as he wrapped his strong arms around my body.

"Bella will live. She toyed with my heart for a while before we got together, so I think she wouldn't fault me for comforting a friend." I was speechless. Without thinking, I found my body leaning into Jacob's for comfort. _Yes, we would have been best friends, if I didn't date Edward. I know it. I am glad I can have this moment with Jacob. Bella is in good hands and will be safe from Aro as long as she is with Jacob. Like Alice said, protection by the pack will prevent the Volturi wanting to jump the gun on forcing Bella to choose death or immortality. Bella is a chosen mate which they will understand will invoke war, if they attempt to do anything to her. _

I felt moisture collect on my face and knew it wasn't sweat. Jacob noticed too and pulled me in closer. "Everything will be okay, Jess. Okay? I am here for you. I will give you whatever support you need. Please don't run away again though, okay? That's not like you. You face your problems head on. You are my 'A-game' Jessica. Don't be giving your own life your 'B-game'. Promise?" Jacob's concern for me caused more tears to flow. They were of joy. He was right on the money. _Maybe in this moment he is my sun after all. _Reaffirming to me as long as the sun rises and sets, I will keep living each day until my last breath. I had already made my mind up on that before jumping, but hearing it coming from Jacob must have been a sign I was right.

"Okay. Okay. And promise, Jacob Black. You are just what I needed today." I saw the sun rise in Jacob's eyes and my smile embodied a brightness that could only be reflected. Jacob's smile he returned to me sent chills down my spine. The sun smiled at me. Today would be a good day. **The first of what I had left.**

By Jacob's persuasion, I followed him to Sam and Emily's. Food sounded good to me, and I was curious to meet the pack for the first, _and most likely last_, time.

As soon as we walked through the door together, we were bombarded. Typical. And amazing.

"**Pay up**, Quil! Told you he would leave Bella for Jessica." The enthusiastic announcement came from a russet skin boy with an impish grin sprawled across his face. He offered Jacob and me two thumbs up before stalking to the shorter Quileute. "Oh yeah, I am the handsome and _single_ Embry, Jessica. Just in case Jake messes this up."

"Nope! Look at their body language, Embry! _He_ is still with Bella. Now if _he_ could stop fawning over Jessica in _secret_ and just focus on Bella…all would be good. $20 is still mine, Emb." _Awkward. _I didn't dare to look at Jacob amongst the drama his packmates were dishing out and because I couldn't help but feel a blush creep on my cheeks.

"I mean I get it. Jessica had a bit more spark. For some reason, he likes docile women. Jessica would be too much of a challenge for him." Embry's giddiness was exponentially increasing as we all witnessed the anger seething off of Jacob. I was slowly backing away from the imminent eruption.

"Hey! Lug-nuts! I have worked _too _hard to help Jacob here to score Bella for you mutts to mess with his head. I mean I even went out with Edward to give him an advantage." The room fell silent. No one laughed at my exaggerated story. _Obviously exaggerated__. _Or so I thought. Reading the room around me, we weren't all on the same page. Before I could clean up the mess I made, I cowered under Jacob's chilling scowl. "No…" His eyes narrowed. "You did not."

It wasn't a question. However, it almost was phrased as one. _Almost_.

"**Right?**" Jacob stalked closer to me and gripped my shoulders tightly. I looked around the room for help. Everyone's eyes were focused on us. They just needed the popcorn as that watched the newest Lifetime movie, "Jessica Retracts Her Joke because Wolves Can't Take a Darn Joke". Starring me, Jacob and the pack.

"Down boy," I murmured with the soothing voice of talking to an excited puppy. "Of course not! It just…happened."

"How though?" Jacob's grip loosened but had not yet released me.

"Does it matter?" I sighed. "We are over now."

"Please tell him," Seth Clearwater chimed in. Well, I assumed Seth since he was the youngest looking in the vicinity. "He's been wondering for **months**!" I immediately regretted looking at Seth during his request. _Guilted by puppy dog eyes._

So, I caved in and gave Jacob and the pack the run down – to a certain degree. I even included the demise of our relationship stemmed from my five-year deadline.

"What if he didn't confess after he saved you?" Jared chimed in. I resisted glaring at him. _Was that a necessary question?!_

"Well…I would still be going to school and living my life. So, nothing has changed." I caught Embry aggressively elbowing Quil out of the corner of my eye. _Boys_. I rolled my eyes before announcing my departure. "I should head out. I promised Daniel I would help him on his school science fair project."

"Sounds like a killer Friday night," Embry snickered. Jacob's irritation at his pack was not unnoticed. They thrived on it while I shook my head despite being rather amused by their teasing nature.

"A girl has got to have her priorities." I winked at my audience before my exit. Jacob followed me out the door.

"Jessica?"

"Mmmmhmmm?" I was fishing through my jacket pocket for my car keys. _Did I put them in my coat pocket or maybe my-_

"What if Bella and Edward stayed together?" My hand stilled. I closed my eyes and pictured my answer before vocalizing it.

"Life would have gone on with me in your corner as long as you wanted to fight for Bella." Jacob leaned against my car and I resumed feeling around for my car keys.

"And if I gave up?"

"I would have been happy you didn't settle," I remarked with genuine pleasure. "I hope Bella is everything you ever wanted, Jake. I am happy for you."

"Thanks, Jessica. Who knows? Maybe we would have had ended up together if Bella and Edward didn't…" Jacob trailed off and I wasn't sure what he was implying or_ if _his suggestion was innocent. So, I laughed.

"No way. I wouldn't dare to run with a wolf who can imprint." My hand finally gripped my keys in the front pocket of my jeans. "I am **no one's** back up plan."

Jacob moved off my car while he carefully chuckled. "I know." He opened the car door for me after I unlocked the doors. "Don't be a stranger. Or Bella won't be the only reason I have to head east."

I offered Jacob Black one of the most authentic smiles in my arsenal. What I wanted to say was, _"Staying away from you would never be by choice unless that is what you wanted. You're my friend. I love you. I will keep in touch. I think I need your 'A-game' as I navigate my post-break up life."_ The words were an empty promise I couldn't bear to leave Jacob with. So instead I replied to him, "In that case, I'll remember to use my phone to help prevent extra guest appearances by a high schooler on a college campus."

I squinted my face to Jacob in good fun. A strong gust passed through us and tangled my hair around my face. Half way between smoothing it out, Jacob leaned a hand to tuck some of it behind my left ear. Jacob then moved that same hand to my chin and lifted my face up to meet his eyes directly. "Say the word, and I can be there for you next time. You helped me before, let me help you now."

I leaned on my tip toes and planted a kiss on Jacob's soft cheek that he _kindly_ bent down to me. "We will be in touch soon. Bye _Jake_."

As I was driving away from the house, Bella passed me in her infamous red clunker on the road. I contemplated turning around to say "hi". But…decided to save it for another time. _Bella is safe,__ at least. _I could wait to see her on campus next week. In that moment, I made a secret wish in my heart to part this world on good terms with Bella and knowing Angela could lean on her for support in the future.

I drove away from La Push with a hope and comfort that I had been missing recently.

…

While at home, I made good on my promise to Daniel to help him on his science project. When Daniel overheard me telling my mom on the phone I was, to their surprise, coming back over the weekend, he called dibs on my Friday night. He wanted me to research Science Fair topics with him. When I was his age, I earned third place in the school science fair. He was determined to do just as well or better.

Daniel and I were huddled over the dining room table scouring books with suggested science fair topics. Every fifteen minutes that passed, Daniel increased his level of frustration in not finding a "winner". After one to many sighs from his mouth, I asked him, "Isn't the Science Fair in February?"

"Yes…" Daniel grumbled when his nose still buried in his now third book.

"What's the urgency of figuring this out now then?" I was worried he was putting too much pressure on himself and I didn't understand where it was coming from.

"I have Mrs. Post, your same teacher. She remembers you. She said I have big shoes to fill…"

The pencil snapped in my hand. I shifted my gaze from Daniel back to the book in front of me. Emotion choked my voice. Thick sounding words left my mouth. "Don't listen to her. You are your own person. If anyone ever even hints to the fact that they expect anything from you because of me," I surveyed the area, "**screw them**, Daniel." Daniel's pupils doubled in size. "You give your best, that's all I ever expect from you. Somethings I will be better than you at, and somethings you will surpass me in. Maybe it will be the science fair? Who knows? What I want from you in this project is for you to have fun and not stress so much about it, okay?"

Daniel smiled at me as if I just gave him $20 for free. "How about we ditch the books tonight and play some N64? I think Mario Party is calling our names…" Daniel bobbed his head up and down enthusiastically. As we walked to the game room, I felt a once familiar shame blush rise on my face. I knew what Daniel was going through. It happened to me with Jenna when I was younger. I was happy to bestow to him similar advice she gave me.

…

Saturday morning after I woke up, I found my mom in the kitchen eating pancakes. As soon as she saw me, she made me a plate and poured me a cup of coffee while never saying a word. When I finished my first pancake and was halfway through my coffee, she finally broke her stare on me and opened her mouth. "You seem off this morning, Jessica." I shrugged at her. I was concerned she would pull a secret from me if I tried talking before my caffeine kicked in. "Your father and I were_ very_ surprised you wanted to come back home so soon." What I thought was pancake was actually my cheek. I _was_ chewing on my cheek while my mother was fishing for some confession from me.

I guzzled down the rest of my coffee and finally looked at the concerned expression on my mother's face. "It was an overwhelming first week. I also missed you guys a lot. Home sick, you know?" I smiled lightly to tie the bow neatly on my lie.

"Jessica, what's going on with you and Edward? You hardly talk about him lately and your father mentioned your conversation back in your dorm." I gulped and averted my eyes to my last pancake.

"Well mom…" My voice was beginning to hint at my distress. Mom's cellphone rang and she lifted a finger in the air to instruct me to wait momentarily. I inwardly sighed in relief that I was allowed time to figure out how to cover my slip up.

"Oh yes, of course Debbie." Mom began to frown, and I inferred our conversation was on pause longer then my mom originally intended. After she hung up, she apologized that she had to go off and run some errands for Debbie Lawson. "Jessica." I looked up to my mom as I was chewing the last bite of my breakfast. Mom's eyes caused a wave of uneasiness to jostle me. "A mother feels every heartache her daughter goes through. We will talk before you head back to school, okay?"

I smiled sadly at mom. "Sure, mom. Love you." I wondered if she detected the heartache was more than my breakup with Edward. If a mother could sense that level of despair in her own daughter. I found myself looking forward to leaning on my mother for what I could. We would talk soon after all.

…

Dad's workshop, aka the garage, was a mess. Three different piles of wood, mahogany, oak and chestnut were scattered on the floor. We decided to proceed with oak but hadn't put the other wood away. Dad promised mom before she left on Debbie's errands that we would get to it later after he winked at me.

After dad's assessment of my bookshelf in my dorm room, he took it upon himself to build me a stool to reach the top shelf easily. He was right about me needing to extend to my toes to reach it.

Last night before I went to bed, he showed off to me his design sketch before I was recruited to help. Well, not recruited. I volunteered to assist, and my Dad was pleasantly surprised. This was an atypical way for us to spend time together.

In the workshop, I followed all his directions to the letter. Safety first as well. I had to wear gloves, a long sleeve shirt, pants and safety goggles in order to participate. We were just getting into the groove of things when Dad stopped sanding a wood plank after I began to start on my own piece.

"Jessica."

"Yeah, Dad?"

"Before you were born, I wished you were a boy," dad confessed quietly. "I wanted to have a son. I was an only child growing up and always wished for a brother. I imagined your mom and I would have two boys." I stopped sanding and looked at my Dad. He shifted his ball cap lower while he dropped his chin to his chest.

I was curious as to why he was telling me this. What provoked this secret sharing? Maybe because we were doing a father and son like task?

"We decided to not find out the sex before you were born. And every day I prayed you were a boy while your mother was pregnant." Dad picked up his head and his eyes were glistening. It was like looking into a mirror. We had the same cerulean blue eyes. His eyes seemed to hold disgrace in them in this moment though.

"Then _lo and behold_, you were presented in my arms after your mom gave birth. All my dreams changed in an instant when I looked at your face. This tiny, baby girl grabbed my heart and you have never let go of it since the day you were born." Dad took a seat by his work bench and grabbed the handkerchief dangling off the side of the bench. He dabbed at the tears bordering his lower lash line.

"Over the years, I never wished otherwise. I was thrilled when Daniel was born. I watched you grow into a wonderful sister. More recent in that bit though." Dad winked at me and I recalled how before I became Katie, I gave Daniel a hard time. But the love was always there still.

"Having you help me like this makes me feel foolish to think I _**ever**_ wished you would be a boy. You would have been my buddy regardless of your gender. I appreciate this and _**all**_ the time we have spent together." Dad stood up and I felt a slow smile build on my face.

"I never want this," he waved his finger between the two of us, "to change." My wide smile and silence prompted him to continue.

"I know in _some _ways it will as you continue to make your way as an adult. Just know, you'll _always_ be my little girl. I love you. I don't say that often enough, but I want you to know it." His soft, and loving words were _everything_ to me in that moment.

"Dad, **I love you more**," I whispered as I bounded into his arms for a hug in one leap. "If you never told me, I would still know, Dad. Everything you do for me, I notice. You are an amazing Dad. Thank you. I will never take for granted you and mom." _Especially since I never got to have moments like this with my parents as Katie. _

"Good. Let's get back to sanding. Then priming the wood after. Tomorrow we can paint. I think a dark green finish would look good, but it's your stool. Next time you come back home, I'll have this ready for you Jessie." Dad's proud smile melted my heart. I never knew love could be this strong with a parent. I never would have appreciated this moment as much without my memories as Katie to know how good I had it. I almost let the pain of my future spoil the moment. But that was _future_ Jessica's problem. In this moment, I just wanted to cherish this time. Soak up every second.

So, I did.

I hung on my dad's every word in our time together. Enamored with every story. I was just a daughter helping her father with her whole life in front of her. For that brief time at least.

...

Sunday was here and the time had come to handle Edward and his family. Apart of living the life I had left to the fullest partially hinged on them understanding why I accept my death and wouldn't become a vampire. It was time for the truth.

I wanted this conversation to only be between Edward and I. But I understood that it was important to share with them all. Each member of the Cullens had to understand why I wouldn't even dare to become a vampire.

I stood up and walked in front of the fire place. My audience was unreadable. Aside from the contempt radiating from their general direction. They were all worried about Edward though. So, I could take the heat. It was on them to keep Edward going when I was gone. I hoped after this conversation, they would be a scosh more at peace with why.

I licked my lips. Closed my eyes. I pretended _they_ were behind me and had my back. "This is my second life."

Many of my audience blinked in response. I waited to see if there were any smart comments or curious questions that needed to be asked. But they all remained silent and allowed me to continue.

"When I was hit in the head by Bella, I woke up as myself from my previous life. With no recollection I was Jessica now."

I forced my head down. Losing my bravery to look my audience in the eyes any longer. "I was confused for so long. Believing I was her and couldn't get back to my family in my past life."

"What era were you born in?" I heard doubt despite Jasper's attempt at a thoughtful question.

"The 20th century. But...it was a different world."

"_Different_?" Alice's face pinched in confusion.

"You all don't exist there, and my family from that world doesn't exist here." I shut my eyes, focusing on drawing strength from somewhere deep inside me. _I can do this. _

"When I woke up in Edward's room after you all rescued me from Victoria, everything came back to me. I remembered who I was here, but it did not diminish who I was previously. We were like two halves that fused together. She improved upon my faults here in this life."

I looked upon Edward's stunned face. "I am so sorry, Edward. I know I should have told you, _but_...I couldn't bring myself to. I wanted to leave my past in the past for what I could." I began to tug at the edge of my shirt.

"I lost a lot of my family in my last life. My parents died when I was **five** years old. I was taken in by my grandparents and they died when I was in college. It was just my sister and I against the world when I was killed. I was just about to start my career too." I knew they all detected the bitterness at the end of my last sentence as well.

"I would not have made it to 24 in that life though if I didn't believe I would see my family _again_. I believed when you died, you would be reunited with your loved ones in some form of an afterlife. Here I am though, reincarnated as Jessica Stanley."

I looked each one of them in the eyes. "I haven't let go of that belief. Alice," I called attention to the only vampire looking at me with eyes full of empathy. "When you had a vision of my drowning, you were not incorrect in your assumptions. I was giving up. I wondered if I died here, if I would see my family again. _But_ Edward saved me." I looked at Edward's face. He reverted back to a blank, stoney expression as he processed my information overload.

"I do not desire immortality. I want to be with them all again. If I live forever, that will never happen. I will never look upon their faces or talk to them _ever again_."

"If what you are saying is true, Jessica...you aren't with them now. What makes you think you'll see them after dying a second time?" Esme's question was one I had asked myself a many times.

"_Hope_." I smiled to myself. "I _love_ them all so much. It's worth the risk. They are my family. The Stanley's are too. I would see them again too. This, is what I choose to believe. You may not agree, but it's not your life."

"Edward." Edward's mouth twitched and I knew he was at least still listening. "Remember when you found me running away to the woods after I got hit to the head?" Edward remained still. "You knew then I was a different person. Not the same Jessica Stanley you hated." I omitted revealing about the Twilight Saga. I decided it was not fair to drop that grenade on them before I died. I didn't want to shatter or confuse Edward even more. I loved him. I needed to know he would be okay. This sharing of the partial truth was enough.

Edward stood up and walked over to me. "I understand. But why _five_ years for us?"

Edward's eyes widened when I laced my fingers through his hand that was once by his side. "I had five years with my parents in my last life. I still feel it. Their love. And I am still grieved. To me...five years was all I could allow myself before I had to let you go. Five years would have given me a lifetime of love I could hold onto. **Because it was you.** After that, I needed to live a normal life because I still have family here and things I wanted to do that would be more difficult if I stayed with you."

I pulled Edward toward me and wrapped my hands around his waist. "I love you, Edward. _So much_. More than I allow myself to recognize most times. **It is scary.** But...that love cannot override the love I have for the Smith's. I want- no, **need** to see my family again. This is not the end for my second life that I hoped for, but if this is how my fate unfolds then I won't fight it. And just to let it be known, I would never even think of the option of running away and endangering your family. I will accept my fate. And you, Edward Cullen, will live on because you must. I want to watch over you and see you happy. I want to tell my parents about this great man I fell in love with. I want to see you have a good life. You will live the life I never got to have for me. I will live through you. Promise me, Edward. Otherwise, you will **break **my heart before I am even dead."

"I promise," Edward mumbled before he pressed his cool lips on my forehead. Edward returned my embrace.

"**Liar**!" Alice hissed, interrupting the mood. I attempted to pull away to look at Alice, but Edward clung to me tighter. I was struggling to inhale and exhale.

"You will not offer yourself to Aro in trade for Jessica remaining human!" Alice's shrill voice motivated me to slip through Edward's hold on me and back away from him.

"No, Edward!" I shouted at him.

"If there is a chance, I'll do what I must." Edward answered Alice first before looking at me. He slowly approached me. My body was trembling in rage.

"Don't!" I snapped at his advance.

"I have lived over a century. In total, you have lived to be 42 if I remember you saying you died at 24 right. _You deserve_ a full life. I have had one. But not you...yet." Edward reached to brush the tears off my cheeks. "Joining them won't mean death, Jessica."

"It may as well be," I retorted spitefully. "Me being here was a mistake. I should have never been reborn or forced to remember my past life. Then you would not even have to be on this path." I sobbed as I dropped to the wood floor on my knees.

"_It was no mistake_. I wouldn't have it any other way. You showed me a love I could have never known otherwise. Maybe saying mate isn't the right word for us." Edward gracefully dropped to the ground next to me. "Soul mates. That's what we are. It is your soul I fell in love with. And they say you're lucky if you find yours. Even if we don't get to spend your human lifetime together, I will feel forever grateful I ever got to meet you. Be with you. Love you. And you even loved me in return." Edward kissed my cheeks and brought my head to his chest.

It felt like such a private moment, but I didn't forget his family was an audience to our show.

"Alice, does it work?" Esme asked barely above a whisper.

"I don't know. My visions haven't extended beyond Edward making the offer. I keep getting interference with..."

"The glitch!" Emmett's smug response was not well received given the present situation. Rosalie viciously called Emmett an idiot.

"None of you will allow that, right?" I asked the room after I pulled away from Edward's chest. I continued to look at the golden eyes and ignored Edward's clenching jaw.

"Maybe..." Carlisle released Esme's hand and stood up. "This is time we talked as a family, _privately_." Carlisle's eyes locked on me and I nodded in understanding. "Alice, take Jessica to get some food. I am sure she must be starving. It's well past dinner time." Alice's face downturned. Jasper glided over to her and whispered in her ear.

"Jasper is right, Alice. I want you to be able to focus on the outcome of the future. I am hoping if you can clear your head and relax, you can channel your visions without those interruptions. Jessica could use a break too." I was in awe of Carlisle's calming nature.

Edward gripped my right hand tightly, preventing me from standing up fully. "Edward...?"

"She is not leaving."

"Edward it's fine. I'll be back with Alice soon. _I am hungry_. Also, I think you could use some family input without my presence. I know what I told everyone is a lot to take in. Take time to discuss and you can ask me more when we get back." My attempt to sound light hearted was not lost on Edward. He yanked me back down and I fell into his lap. His cold hands gently caressed my face, memorizing every line with his touch. Then he pulled me in for a kiss. A deep, painful kiss. We both knew the sacrifices we were making. We each thought the other was in the right. I pushed past the pain of knowing the kisses we had left to share were limited. I was kissing… a man that I was madly in love with. I could finally acknowledge this after deciding to embrace not holding back on anything with the time I had left. Including now my heart. Our mouths moved over each other as if we were the only ones in the room.

*cough* *cough*

I broke away from Edward's lips. "Alright, Emmett." I shot Emmett a glare before I kissed Edward's forehead. "I love you." Edward let me walk away to Alice. Alice hooked her arm through my own and we set off on our _temporary_ departure from the Cullen's house.

...

"It's been an hour since we've eaten. Think we can go back yet, or will this take awhile?" My antsy voice shocked me. Alice shook her head and we continued to drive on the road. I had no idea where we were. All I could make out was that the road was two ways and only lit by our headlights. I nervously clocked the speedometer. Alice was driving faster then I felt comfortable with.

The heat from the vents I once welcomed in the vehicle was now getting to me. I began to remove the long sleeve shirt I was wearing. I delicately inched the sleeve off my left arm. The rest of it, I carelessly ripped off my body.

A wave of relief came over me as I felt the cool air blow on my exposed skin not covered by my tank top.

"Jessica, what is that?" I knew what she was asking without having to glimpse over to see where her eyes were directed.

"It's a tattoo, Alice. I got it last night."

Alice gripped my wrist and forced its rotation. She peeled back the cotton pad to read my freshly inked tattoo on my pink, raw skin.

She did a double take of the black calligraphy text before she pulled over off on the side of the road. "This...But...Why?" Alice shut her eyes before turning to the driver's side window.

"I can give the simplified answer. But the in depth one wouldn't make sense." _Right now, at least. In 2007, it would. _

Alice began to bang her head on the window.

"Alice stop!" Each time Alice's head knocked into the window, I heard the cracking in the glass expand. I leaned over to grab Alice's shoulder to prevent her from fully shattering the window. Her face turned back to me and I met eyes...that were empty, black orbs.

"Alice?" The nervous edge to my tone rung in my ears as I tried to shove down the fear. I withdrew my shaky hand from her shoulder. _Is this her glitching?_

Alice snatched my wrist. "_Sorry_," she whispered with regret. I watched in horror as she drew her mouth to my tattoo

"**No**! **Stop**!" I jerked around in my seat throwing every ounce of my weight into my movement to return my wrist back to my possession.

The teeth that sank into my wrist were the worst form of betrayal I ever knew. My lost time here and the potential of seeing them _all_ in the afterlife was stripped away as the promise of immortality began to course through my veins.

"**Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh**!" I screamed while my body began to writhe in pain. I wished I was dead.

* * *

_Author's Note ii:_

_Some parts of this chapter I love, some I just had to muddle through. I was going to make this a 10-chapter Arc. Shortening it to 9 now. When Jessica goes to the Cullen's was originally ch 8, but I felt like meshing it all in this one chapter. Going to make Jacob's Arc 9 chapters as well. As of now, the next two chapter installments will be Jacob's Arc._

_Yeah, I am not doing this in the order I originally planned. __**Well**__…all I can say is you got to follow where the inspiration is! – Lalaland972_

* * *

**Lalaland972's Response to Review:**

_[From Edward Arc Ch 7]_

**Rosemeiness:** I appreciate your comments! When I understand what readers think, sometimes it helps me think on if I am giving enough on paper as what I see in my head. I hope this chapter helps for your understanding in why she felt that way.

**Silentmayhem:** Great observations and…surprise to where we left off in this chapter! :O

**DxGRAYxMAN:** Finally, she lets them in on it this chapter :O What a lot of people have been waiting for I think lol


	16. Jacob Arc Ch 6

**Jessica's Happily Ever After?**

_Sequel to "But Why am I Jessica?"_

**Chapter 6**

**[Jacob Arc]**

"**A Million Steel Cables or Roots?"**

"_Katie?" _

I thought I heard Jenna's familiar voice call me softly. Little by little, I allowed my eyelids to unveil my current surroundings to my eyes.

I found myself hovering over an unfamiliar bedroom that consisted of a simple set up. I gradually put together the room I found myself in was _in fact_ a hotel room. The carpet boldly swirled into an ugly, never ending pattern of brown and yellow. The beige walls supported basic art that covered a broad spectrum of flowers.

The unmade king size bed caught my attention. On the far corner of the brown comforter adorning the bed, a simple black suitcase was abandoned half open. In it contained a disarray of clothes that looked recently rummaged through. Carefully tucked away in a mesh pocket in the interior lining was a photograph of a family. I gasped as I recalled the day my sister passed on to me the last photo of our family before our parents passed away.

There it was. My once most prized possession. A photo of my Dad holding me in his arms while my mother wrapped her arms around Jenna's shoulders.

I attempted to reach out and touch the photo. But my hand only passed through the solid object. I began to cry in frustration when I heard the door to the hotel room click open. After swinging open the door, Jenna walked through. I watched her pass me and head straight to the suitcase.

She refolded each clothing article in her suitcase and zipped it shut. After putting it on the floor, she peeled back the comforter on the bed. I turned my head over my shoulder to look out the window to see the sun still high in the sky.

Several minutes passed by as I observed her struggle to let sleep overcome her. She flipped and flopped her body into new positions. She scrunched and unscrunched the pillow supporting her head. But still, sleep would not meet her demands and take over.

She let out a heavy sigh before frustratingly rising from the bed and walking into the restroom. I waited outside. The shower turned on. And the pitter patter of the jet stream splashing on the ceramic tub and shower tiles could not drown out the sobs emitted from her mouth. Each echo of her cries of grief was another dagger in my heart.

...

I had let my observations of my new surroundings distract me from figuring out what was happening to me. I was not sure if I was dead or how I came to have a view in my old world. The last thing I remembered was seeing a car crash into the driver's side of my Camry. I couldn't believe I once again had been killed off by a car. It would have been ironic if it was not my own doing by not paying attention while I was driving.

I pulled myself from venturing down that rabbit hole when Jenna reemerged from the bathroom. I finally began to _really_ take notice of her appearance since she first entered the room. She was thinner. Listless. A shell. I squinted to the point my eyes were almost shut to find a familiar spark of the Jenna I knew from a physical aspect.

I found nothing.

I wanted to comfort her. Assure her I was okay. But I abruptly felt a pull on my pinky. I stroked around the finger's outline to identify the feeling of a string wrapped around it that Jacob had once described to me. What supposedly connected us when I last caught between worlds, or whatever damnation this was. The invisible string was knotted tightly around my pinky finger and tugging me somewhere.

I wanted to stay, but I was failing to untie the knotted ring, I could not see, on my pinky. The engineer in me knew how to solve the problem. I wiggled and scraped it down my finger. Each centimeter down my finger that the string crept past was brewing concern in my heart. I was keenly aware of what I was officially severing.

Without any more hesitation, I pulled it off around my nail and released it into the air.

It was done.

Our bond was broken.

No more strings or roots.

I just wanted to stay where I was and watch Jenna. I had no other desires in that moment.

...

She lied to me when she said she would be okay. When she said I could let go of this world. I had been shadowing Jenna for weeks and found my big sister to be struggling. I was blessed and cursed at the same time to see Jenna, but not be able to talk or touch her.

Every new day I prayed for a sign she would be on the mend. She would find a new zest to go about the world and live it like I imagined she would sometime after she let go of me. But I was forced to watch the same show on repeat after our first run in at the hotel, her coming home from the hospital.

She wakes up. Goes to work. Comes home from work. Cries for an hour. Goes for a run. Lays in bed until she falls asleep. And then it all repeats.

My death killed what little spirit my sister had left in her.

I wanted to confront my sister. Shake her from the semi-conscious state she was floating by life in. I **needed** her to **live**. I **needed** her to be **happy**. Otherwise, we would both remain tormented in the personal hells we were surviving in. Hers an emotional hell and mine a spiritual one.

I was surprised when she did something out of her routine one evening. I allowed myself to hope. I shadowed Jenna nearly 24/7 but permitted myself to sometimes venture off and people watch. So, I was stunned when I watched her drive up to a storage unit. She brought a small medium sized box back with her. It was a familiar box. It was labeled "**Katie's Crap**". When she unveiled what was inside, it was not what I remembered unpacking from it.

A lot of it was personal junk I didn't see a need for her to hold on to. She was looking for something in particular as she sifted through all the crap she dumped on the floor in her living room. _Oh, that's my i-phone! _She sighed longingly as she drew my phone to her chest as if it was more than an inanimate object. After a few seconds passed, she walked to the nearest power outlet and plugged my phone into the charger on the wall.

We waited ten minutes for the phone to turn on. It was in desperate need of battery charge, if it had been as long as I think it had since it was first turned off.

When the apple icon flashed on the screen, I was interested to know what she wanted to recover from my phone. _Does she even know my passcode? It's the year mom and dad died. Did I ever tell her that? I cannot remember. _

She pulled out her own phone from her back pocket and commanded to Siri "_Call Katie_". We both intently watched my phone ring, knowing no one would answer. _At least_, not the true owner of the phone.

My phone stopped ringing and then we both heard, "**Hi!** You have reached Katie. I can't come to the phone right now, _but_... I **CAN** now call you back in a _reasonable_ time frame because I just finished grad school! **Woohoo**! Leave a message after the beep!"

She hung up and I once again had to endure the rivers from her eyes. When she stopped shaking and the flow of tears subsided to infrequent drops, she called my phone again.

_Again_, it rang. _Again_, we both listened to my voicemail start off message. _Did my voice __**always **__sound that high?_

This time, she left a voicemail. "Hey Katie… This is as close as I am going to get to talking to you, I guess. I am sorry I waited so long to do this. But I am running out of time. Tomorrow is the last day your phone was paid up to. Service will be canceled after that. I won't be able to call you anymore at this number. I…I miss you, Katie. **I miss you so much**." Uncontrollable shaking began to take hold of her body. Jenna shut her eyes and she barely squeaked out her next words. "I feel _so alone_. I don't know how to get through this by myself. We always had each other through our grief with mom and dad, grandma and grandpa. But Katie…you're my little sister. You were **NOT** supposed to die before me. And **NOT** _so _young. I feel so empty without you. My grief is eating me up. I _know_ I cannot give up though because I _promised_ you I would be okay. _I promised_. And I am failing you, Katie. God I am failing you. You wouldn't want this for me. I am trying hard. So hard to get through this. One day at a time. I am surviving for you and everyone. **Please be proud of me.** Even when I am struggling. I am _trying_. I really am. I love you little sis. I will talk to you later, okay? _Gooddbye… Katie_."

Jenna slinked to the ground by the end of her voicemail. She ended the call and rested her head on her forearms that were supported on her knees.

...

She was trying. I did notice. And I was proud of her for chugging along. On the one-year anniversary of my death, she made a trip to the Forest Vale Cemetery. She intended to bury half of my ashes with our parents. The other half, she wanted to scatter in places she thought I would want to "rest". I agreed with most of the places I saw on the list she drafted up.

Jenna remained at the headstone following the ceremony of my ashes being placed with my parents below the ground. Jenna was the only one in attendance. I wondered why she hadn't invited anyone else to be there for it. _I __**had **__some friends…_

Jenna was on her knees and resting her right hand on the newly minted headstone when a young boy ran up to her.

"Mama!"

Jenna was speechless as a little boy was clinging to her waist. Her wide eyes searched for the owner of the child. In the distance, a tall man was running over to them both.

"Daniel!" The man cried in disbelief over his son's actions. He cautiously approached his son and Jenna. The man's eyes silently communicated his apologies to Jenna before he addressed his young son.

"Daniel…_we have discussed this_. Mom is in heaven. This nice, young lady looks to know someone in heaven too. Let's let her be in peace." His soft voice was everything you would expect from a good father delicately handing a child who still didn't understand the concept of death. The man extended his hand to Daniel to take. Daniel assessed his father's hand before shaking his head in refusal.

Jenna looked as lost as the man over what to do. Jenna returned the embrace of the child and spoke cautiously. "Hi Daniel, would you like to hear a song my sister and I used to sing after we lost our parents?"

Daniel looked up and stared blankly as Jenna. She assumed that his silence was not a "no". When she began to hum the intro, my heart softened for the first time back in this world.

"_Love of mine, _

_Someday, you will die._

_But I'll be close behind, I'll follow you into the dark. _

_No blinding light_

_or tunnels to gates of white. _

_Just our hands clasped so tight. _

_Waiting for the hint of a spark. _

_If Heaven and Hell decide that they both are satisfied. _

_Illuminate the "No's" on their vacancy signs. _

_If there's no one besides you when your soul embarks, _

_then I'll follow you into the dark_."

"What does it mean?" Daniel asked curiously. Jenna looked up to his father to gage if she had permission to continue. The man's face was unreadable. Perhaps he was in awe. But he never voiced it. So, Jenna continued on.

"Everyone can interpret something differently. The way my sister and I viewed the song is that just because someone leaves you, it doesn't mean they are gone. You are always with them. Your soul. Someone can be scared leaving, but in the song they are told they will be okay because their loved ones will be with them soon enough. Time passes differently for them. While we may wait years to see them again, it will be a short time for them. We will all be reunited. Or so, that is what Katie and I like to think." Jenna tried to diminish the sadness hinted in her smile. But the child knew better when he looked at her face.

"Is Katie your sister?" Jenna took in a sharp breath to gather her resolve and breathed a yes. She withdrew one of her arms from around Daniel and pointed to the headstone at their feet. "I just buried her today with our parents." She softly rubbed the engraving of my name carved into it.

"She died?"

"Yes."

"And your parents are dead?"

"They are."

"My mom is dead," Daniel lightly whispered as he slowly inched away from Jenna. She patted his head and offered both him and his dad her silent condolences. In such a place, there was no need to verbalize them.

"I am sorry. You reminded me of my mom. You are very pretty and have brown hair just like her." Jenna's emerald eyes lit up with hope.

"That happens to me too sometimes. I imagine I see them. It's nice thinking they are still here with you again. But…I will see Katie and all my family one day again. It's not my time yet, but I know they are waiting for me." Jenna's smile was beautiful. It was optimistic. I was waiting for this day when I would see this smile again.

The father seemed to see the same thing I did. His mouth slightly fell open when he fully recognized the beauty of my sister in front of him, inside and out.

The man stepped forward with a fixed gaze on Jenna. "Hi, I am Daniel's father, Henry. I am sorry we intruded on you during such an important day. We came to set flowers on his mom's grave, and he got carried away after seeing you…"

Daniel guiltily made eye contact with his father before walking back to him. Jenna laughed. **She laughed!** And said it was okay. "I think I needed this. So, thank you Daniel. I hope you talked to your mom. I like to talk to my mom and dad. And Katie now, too."

Before Henry and Daniel left, Henry boldly asked for Jenna's email address. Jenna shyly wrote it out. And…I was soon to learn that was the beginning of my sister meeting her future husband and step-son.

….

Jenna was glowing. She carefully cradled a plastic bag close to her chest as she waddled to the cliff's edge. Her belly was swollen to the size of a volleyball protruding from her abdomen. This spot looked familiar. I couldn't place where I had seen it before. She looked out to the horizon of the ocean meeting the sky. She inhaled deeply and began to laugh on her exhale.

When her giggles died down, she said, "When I first went to your apartment after you died, I saw the boxes you had unpacked. I wish I could have heard what you thought of the box I labeled as "**Katie's Crap**". Actually, that is where my inspiration came from for this last place to spread your ashes at, Katie. I remember how much you loved the Twilight Saga. Honestly, I didn't get it. I mean I tried listening to the first book on audiotape, _but_ 'chagrin' was said one to many times for my taste before I hit the pause button and tossed in the trash**. But ****you**** liked it. **It brought you joy at a time you were mostly depressed if not focused on school. I thought you would get a kick out of me honoring that love you had for the book series by spreading your ashes in two places. First, Forks but of course. Second, this cliff side in La Push. A coworker told me it's a famous scene in one of the books, so I decided to end here. Because your ashes will carry you into the ocean and you'll get to travel the world that way, Katie. **I love you.** I feel you in everything I do. Just like with the rest of our family. I promised you I would be okay. _And I am okay_. Some days are harder than others, but I won't give up. I **will **be happy for you. I am married now, and we have our own daughter on the way. She will be named Katie after you. Please watch over her and us all. I love you baby sis."

Tears streamed down Jenna's flushed cheeks as she grabbed a fistful of my ashes from the plastic bag. She released her fingers over the cliffs edge and watched the last bit of me fade into the air.

"_Love you too, Jenna_," I whispered as my lips hovered over her head to plant a kiss she would never feel.

I watched as a fleck of ash caught into the ocean's waves.

***snap***

The full force of everything I had forgotten over my time spent here rushed over me in an instant.

Jacob. Daniel. Mom. Dad. My friends. Memories of my loved ones from the Twilight Universe popped into my brain at an overwhelming rate. Everything came crashing down on me**. I forgot about them.** The life I abandoned. I needed to get back to them. If Jenna knew, she would have preferred I lived on versus watch over her. I would have desired the same for her. I was _finally _at peace knowing Jenna was okay and happy.

I attempted to steady myself in the air as the memories swirled in my head; everything I didn't say to Jacob was haunting me. He didn't know. And I pushed him away.

_Every day when we were together, Jacob showed me I was __**more**__ than an imprint to him. I was his lover. The one. The moment it became hard, I ran because I was used to good things being taken away from me. Love doesn't last. That's all I knew as Katie Smith from the romantic prospective, and even that family left you. I did not mean to not think of him... My grief, still fresh and powerful, was all consuming. Maybe he could have helped, if I told him. But I didn't know how much I shoved down until he imprinted on Renesmee... None of this has been his fault._

My love for Jacob couldn't hide the fact that I had no idea how to go back. I had been stuck here for so long, maybe a year? Was it even possible to go back?

_I refuse to give up! I don't know why Jacob was able to imprint on me, but it was not because of no reason. I want to fight for him and our love. I know Renesmee could eventually become a lover to him, if I let it like in the books. But where I ended up __**was not**__ the true world of the Twilight Saga. I will fight for Jacob, and I will embrace the Stanley's as my new family. __I want my second chance to mean something.__ I want to be like Jenna and live with my grief, but still be happy. I will tell Jacob the truth when I get back. If I can...no more hiding. If he chooses to stay with me as Katie, then I will be his forever. If he lets me go because he doesn't trust me, I will attempt to make amends. Eventually if it doesn't pan out, I just want him to be happy. I want to be the one to make him happy, but if that's not me, then I just want him to be happy and safe._

Now back in control of my body, I lowered myself to the cliff's edge. With hope in my heart, I dove over the cliff's edge as I whispered, "I love you, Jacob." I wonder if I will be able to feel him-

**Beep…Beep…Beep…Beep**

"Jessica?"

* * *

_Author's Note: Took forever to post this one...but, ch 7 is halfway drafted for this Arc and so is ch 8 Edward Arc! I felt so-so about this update since it was mainly Katie/Jenna, but from here on out we get A LOT of story characters back in the mix :D and the volturi! oh snap! and **JACOB! ^_^** \- Lalaland972_

**LalaLand972's Reponses to Reviews (Alphabetical Order):**

**angelacorus****:** See, she is not dead : ) No suffering intended for the fans! Just a _heavy _dose of drama. Jessica needed that to happen to feel at peace with what happened to Jenna when she died. But of course, there are other important matters to attend to in the upcoming chapters! Thank you for the review!

**Brankel1****:** I am glad you loved it! Thank you for the review!

**Charcoal Chicken:** It was intense to write! Though I will admit I had that chapter ending written for a while now! Stay tuned for Edward Arc Ch 8 for the reason why! That will be posted in two updates! I hope this update made your day as well! Thanks for reading and reviewing!

**DxGRAYxMAN**: He has a heart of gold! He wasn't too sneaky about his decision though since Alice caught him lol And, stay tuned for how Jessica copes with the change and her and Edward's relationship future! Thank you for the review!

**Guest:** In my second post from this one, ch 8 Edward Arc will be up. I have to catch up Jacob's Arc first. And ch 8 of Edward Arc is only 50% done… but it will be worth the wait when it is posted! :D

**JustMePMM:** Glad your back with us to continue the journey! : ) I hope when you catch up to the latest update you still have enjoyed the read!

**Moose Voose:** Thank you for the support! I am glad you have been reading and enjoying the continuation of Jessica's journey. Also, happy to hear you were able to be patient with her! I think she has tried a lot of people's patience in both Edward and Jacob Arcs haha Interesting theories on the end of Ch 7 of Edward Arc... Ch 8 will DEFINITELY address the why of the cliff hanger in ch 7… : ) I am interested to read readers thoughts on it when it is posted! I hope you continue to enjoy each arc until the end! Thank you for your review!

**Ri P Raven:** Lol perhaps not now! We will find out what was up with Alice in ch 8! And your second comment brought up great questions I forgot about…I will address those in a future chapter as well! Thank you for that comment. I could have totally spaced that! :O

**silentmayhem****:** Valid points all around! Crazy it in fact was not Esme after all, right?! We will find out why in Ch 8! It is a crazy chapter! Thank you for the review!

**strongbridge****:** I am glad you love the twists even though they are heart wrenching ones! I have been inspired by manga recently to spice up the plot line direction for more 'whaaat'? Especially since we are in non-canon territory now. The continuation will be up in two posts. We will see what fate has in store : ) Thank you for the review and support!

**theDreamer17:** I know, no one saw that coming! Totally out of left field! But ch 8 will cover that answer! And we will see Edward's reaction :O Thank you for the review!

**Wpear:** I am glad I did too! Thank you for being a fan! I hope you continue to enjoy them each as we continue on the end of Edward and Jacob Arcs : )

**Yomiii21:** So, here are my opinions on her character in each arc. [**Edward Arc**] Jessica's character has known family love and only break up scenarios with romantic love. To her at the time, family love is greater than romantic love which is why she would choose death with her faith that she would see her family again. If she was immortal, she would never get that chance. People react and cope with grief differently, this is just how Jessica's has shaped her. I think she is being narrow minded/arrogant/a tad annoying as well…**but!** There wouldn't be a nine-chapter storyline without her making the decisions that she is lol that is just what was done. But this also why I left "But Why am I Jessica?" with an open ended ending because I knew everyone wouldn't like where I took these arcs. [**Jacob Arc**] I feel I need to say less on this one because I think we understand more where she is coming from at the end of this chapter? Once again, her grief shaped her decisions and she did make poor ones in this arc. But she did so while going through a lot of emotions that she felt she couldn't share with anyone because it would reveal identity as Katie.

In general, I hope you continue to read on to the ends despite not being a fan of Jessica's decisions at this point. I think by the endings her character rounds out more in each arc. Anyways, let me know your thoughts if you have anymore and thank you for the review!


	17. Jacob Arc Ch 7

_Author's Note:_

_I know, __**surprise**__! Only a day between updating! _Thanks for the reviews!_ Reading them definitely inspired me during lunch today to write 25% of this chapter. Then I finished/edited it this evening! This one was fun to write. Especially the end! Now we are caught up to the same place for each story arc, updates will go Edward Jacob Edward Jacob. I can't wait to post ch 8 of Edward's Arc but I am hosting company until the end of this month. Expect ch 8 of Edward Arc up by or before Halloween ^_^ _

_P.s. I went a little back and forth on this chapter with the upcoming Volturi scene. If you have any comments/criticism, I am open to re-editing it. I tried my best though, but it may not be "realistic". IDK :/_

* * *

**Jessica's Happily Ever After?**

_Sequel to "But Why am I Jessica?"_

**Chapter 7**

**[Jacob Arc]**

"**A Million Steel Cables or Roots?"**

"Jessica?" When I opened my eyes, I found a blond-haired woman in pink scrubs that was the owner of the voice I did not recognize. She beamed in delight at me. "_Hi honey_. Welcome back. I am going to call your parents, okay?"

The light pouring into my room was blinding. My body felt as if an anvil was crushing it. And my head…seemed to have an ice pick jammed through it. Or that's how I would explain the pain when someone asked. Maybe the doctor? I failed to concentrate on the nurse excitedly mumbling I was out of the thick of it on a phone as my eyelids continue to grow heavier as my body demanded I sleep some more.

When I woke up again, my family was present. My brain swelling was down. I was going to be okay. I was happy with the news and the fact that my family was by my side. I couldn't deny though the high anticipation I felt for when Jacob would finally visit me. _I wonder when that will be?_

I slept that first night in the hospital with an ease that I was_ finally_ comfortable in my own skin. As Jessica Stanley.

I woke up that next morning to seeing Jacob asleep in the chair by my bedside. He looked as beautiful as ever. He was so at peace when he slept. I hadn't seen that look on him since Europe. How I missed it...

I was alive here once again. I finally felt like I belonged. I could live this life. I could fight for Jacob...after the Volturi battle occurred.

Jacob shortly woke up after I did. He sleepy rubbed his eyes and nervously looked over at me. "You're awake," he whispered. He scooted his chair closer. He eyed my hand, then looked at me. Silently asking me permission to take it. I nodded at him. Relief spread across his face as he put my hand in his. It was a natural state for us. One I forgot about.

"I used to not wear a seat belt." Jacob's face was unphased. _At first_. Then it twisted into a scowl.

"After you imprinted...I started clicking it every time I went into my car." Jacob continued to stare at me. Not yet catching on to what I was implying.

"At the start of my senior year, I didn't buckle up because I was okay if it was my time. I can't explain why to you yet. But, after I woke up in the hospital following that vampire battle, I always put on my seat belt. I wanted to live and explore this life. When I broke up with you...I stopped wearing it, Jacob."

Jacob began to shake. It wasn't anger this time taking over him. He was visibly upset. Jacob's eyes darkened to the point I could no longer discern what emotion was taking form in them. His lips started to quiver as his eyes held back tears. He understood what I was saying.

"What the f**k, Jessica?" I briefly flinched. Jacob hardly used curse words. And they were never directed at me. "How could you want that? What about _your _family and friends? What about **me**?" Jacob's anger was not unfounded. It was just. He needed to know. But not yet. It was not the right time.

"It's a long story. One you deserve. But..." I squeezed Jacob's hand three times. I. Love. You. The words I could not yet say to him. "It has to wait. Until the face off over the Volturi is over. I want that to be your focus for now. Okay?" I didn't let one tear fall. I braced my face with a mask that was hardened by my desire to be patient. I would fight for him when the time was right.

"Jessica...it's gone. The-" I felt my heart squeeze and reinforce its walls. _**Oh my god.**_ _I forgot. My sacrifice to stay with Jenna was at the cost of the…_

"Imprint." I finished for Jacob before he had to admit the truth to me.

I had no legs to stand up on anymore in my fight for Jacob. I sacrificed my bond with Jacob to stay with Jenna.

"Please leave, Jacob." Jacob tightened his grip on my hand. "I stood some semblance of a fighting chance before. **But now? With it gone?** I am a boxer without gloves. I'm tapping out." I squeezed his hand three times again and told him to leave and not to cross my doorway again. Literally and metaphorically, I was asking Jacob to close the door on us.

Jacob did not fight me on this request. I guess without the imprint he felt he didn't need to. He knew what I said was true.

_I am not the one. But I wish I was. _

I cried myself back to sleep and hoped to dream of a future where Jacob could be mine for but just one last time.

...

I dreamt I was at rock bottom. The pit I was in seemed to never have an end when I looked up. All I could see was the continuation of an ascent. I found a pack of chalk hooked on my back side, just above my butt. I dipped my hand in the white dust, clapped 90% of it off between my shaking hands and started my climb to the unknown.

…

I was thankful to be alone this time when I woke up. I needed some self-reflection time.

My epiphany for my redemption arc for Jacob's and I's love story had come too late in this life. I would have to go on without him. _He will be happy and healthy._ I told myself that a thousand times over in my alone time. It was almost becoming a chant to myself. While thinking of Jacob roped me back to this life once again, he could no longer be a part of my life going forward. Once we were done with the Volturi stand off and god willing survived, I would withdraw from this Twilight World. Instead focusing on my family and friends. One day I will fall in love again because I am capable and deserve a happy ending too. I will let Jacob go. He will be better off for it. I was right that the first imprint was a mistake. And if I had the choose all over again, I still would have remained with Jenna at the cost of what we had. I needed to know for myself or I would have been stuck and unable to really enjoy this second chance at life.

I cried what seemed like an endless waterfall of tears over what I lost in my hospital room bed. But by the end, that did eventually come, my tears were of joy that I could finally be at peace knowing Jenna and I both could be happy even if we were not together.

Jacob taught me to live and to love in this second life. I would continue to do that for myself. It was easier to know I was able to make that choice without an imprint weighing down on me. Jacob no longer would have to be pulled in opposite directions which made my heart happy too. **He deserved more and better**. _I hope Rensemee can be the one to give it to him_.

I was no longer alone in my room while lost in my thoughts. My eyes began to focus on Edward Cullen standing in my room's door frame.

"Hi Edward." My voice was light. It treaded carefully in the space between us. We hadn't properly talked since he confessed to me. Now that I no longer had the grief mental road block, it was time to listen to Edward and understand where the hell his love for me even came from.

"I am sorry for how I acted before. I was pretty rude ignoring you after that night in my bedroom. I was dealing with a lot of internal stuff and adding what you told me to my plate was a little too much to handle at that time. Now..." I looked up at his face. His expression was unreadable. But his soft, golden eyes told me he was listening. Hanging onto my every word.

"I want to listen. What you told me was pretty big. I mean...you're married and have Renesmee. Why would you tell me how you felt? Why now and not sooner?"

Edward cautiously moved towards my bed. His eyes directed to the available space by my legs. I granted him permission to sit on my bed.

"I wanted to tell you that morning I showed up at your house with a gas canister to take you back to your car abandoned on that road outside of Forks...but then Jacob showed up. I don't think I would have gone through with it then though. I was still with Bella. I needed a sign from you I should break up with Bella and tell you how I felt. But the sign was I shouldn't do anything yet after Jacob showed up. Then he imprinted on you..." I involuntarily felt my mouth form into an "O" shape.

Edward fidgeted in his seat. "In short, I fell in love with you slowly. Who you are. The person I became when I was with you. I tried to let it go after Jacob's imprint. I understood what that bond meant to their pack and knew I should let you have the opportunity with him if you wanted it." Edward's strained smile had a bitter hint to it.

"A year passed, and my feelings never subsided. But, my feelings for Bella did grow again. Not to be what they once were, but enough to know we could make it through an eternity together. I do love her." I nodded at Edward. I believed he did as well.

"When Jacob imprinted on Renesmee...I started to hope this meant you wouldn't be tied to him for certain." My eyes were drawn to each of Edward's hands he ran up and down his legs. I bent forward and took his nearest hand in mine. Edward's eyes widened and a calmness enveloped his facial features.

"I am sorry I ignored you for a year. I thought it was for the best for us all."

"I understand, Edward. Don't apologize for doing what was right for you and Bella."

"With the news of the Volturi coming, I just wanted you to know. In case we died. I love you. Knowing you changed me. I don't expect anything in return, but it feels nice to be open with you about my feelings even if it is just this once."

I rubbed my thumb in delicate circles over his hand. Edward Cullen was my friend. A good friend. "We can't change the past. I can't say how I would have reacted if you would have confessed when you intended to, but this is where we are today. No going back. I have this soft spot for you, Edward. Maybe somewhere along the way it may have been more than just a friendly feeling, but it became muted after Jacob imprinted on me. I love you as a friend, Edward. I want you to be happy with Bella and Rensemee. I think going forward after we face the Volturi, I am going to remove myself from all of your lives. We were destined to meet but maybe not be a permanent stop in each other's lives. You saved me from drowning and dying at the beginning of senior year; you will always be to me the white angel blur that saved me. You are unforgettable. Now...go be with Bella and Rensemee. I'll see you in the meadow. I will be discharged in time to show up. And be happy, Edward." I smiled serenely at Edward Cullen, my once fictional teenage crush.

I leaned forward and gently pressed my lips to Edward's. The kiss was soft, chaste and impactful. A heartbreakers smile broke out on Edward's lips. Edward bent his lips up to my forehead and let his lips momentarily rest on it.

As Edward sat up from my bed he remarked, "This is one of the reasons I fell for you Jessica. I love you. Be happy as well. I'll see you soon."

Edward Cullen left my room, and I mentally checked off one more hard conversation on my list.

My next hard conversation, with Bella, was easier to handle because I remembered my time in the in-between when she confessed her guilt to Jacob. All was forgiven and she knew I wished her nothing but happiness for her family. A concern brought to my attention in our conversation was that Alice had _very_ recently disappeared. When I thought more on it, I became alarmed that Alice was still around. She was supposed to take off and find evidence of vampire hybrids. **She left too late to find the evidence!** Unless there was another way to avoid the battle... We wouldn't know what that was until the time came though. I put my faith in Alice that like in the books, she knew what she was doing.

Daniel's solo visit was the most comforting for my heart. When I was with Jenna, I heard her talk in her sleep. She once mumbled Daniel's name. It made me wonder if my siblings in both worlds had a connection. Both loved me.

Daniel was given permission to stay with me over night. He brought Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. We were half way through it, and for the first time, he actually read aloud to me.

After a successful night of proving my recovery to the nursing staff and doctors, I was discharged from the hospital. The first thing I did when I got home was burn my other two goodbye letters. **I was not dying. **I was going to live. I had faith in my friends to ensure that I was coming out of the Volturi meet and greet alive _and_ human.

I was supposed to be on bed rest in my room for a week. Minimal movement and to take things slowly. But the Volturi wait for no one. I had to sneak out the window like a pre-teen. It **was NOT** as easy as the vampires and wolves made it look to scale from the ground to my bedroom window. I had to use bedsheets to drop to the ground safely in my present condition. I made sure to leave a note saying I would be back later. It was a promise to them and myself as Emily picked me up in Sam's truck.

…

The line assembled in the meadow was a sight to behold. _Again the meadow…seriously. I don't remember if this is where it was supposed to occur in the book…whatever._ Vampires of many skills and talents were present to stand witness for Rensemee. The pack was here to support her too.

I appreciatively eyed Rensemee safe on Jacob's back only a few feet away from me. I at first protested but was forced to stand next to Jacob in his wolf form in the lineup. It was once Alice's place to be. My nerves were building with every passing minute of Alice's absence. They were coming soon. Where was she!? Would she be able to show up on time? She needed-

My eyes caught their pale skin illuminated in the distance. Its shine dulled in comparison to the ruby red jewels sparkling in their eyes. One could easily tell they were delighted for their predicted impending end of the Cullen Clan.

Everything unfolded _mostly_ as expected. Carisle and Aro had their strained greetings to one another. Aro and his posse observed Renesmee was older than what was reported to them. My name was brought up, but I was the least of their concerns at the moment- especially if they just killed us all. Things were spicing up as the Volturi were nearing the decision to incite war in front of their witnesses. _**Where IS Alice?!**_

The tension in the air foreshadowed death. This is not supposed to be my end **or theirs**! I shocked myself with every foot I was driving forward to the Volturi. I was not a threat, so I had nothing to lose at the moment. Or so that's what I told myself as it was too late to turn back around and regroup with everyone else.

Aro laughed in amusement as I approached him. I didn't dare to look back at Jacob. Renesmee returned to his back. Ready to ride off with him when the fight began. The Cullen's and their clan were ready for it. They were assembled with their friends that would stand with them. Alice wasn't here yet. I had to do something.

"I have heard about you, Jessica." Aro lightly tapped the top of his head while sporting a menacing smile. "Imprinted on by a wolf. Now that wolf has imprinted on the child. And…now your imprint bond has been broken." Aro shifted his eyes to who I assumed was Marcus. Marcus held a quizzical expression that did not exactly support Aro's enthusiastic assessment of Jacob and I's relationship. "All very fascinating. _Yes_, come to me my dear; let's see what you've been up to."

I extended my hand forward to Aro. The glimmer in his eyes died when a frown stirred on his face after clasping my hand for more than a second.

"Nothing..." Aro murmured to himself. His quiet voice stirred those around him. "_Very_ interesting."

_No! I need to show him. What can I do? Why isn't Alice here yet?!_ I concentrated my thoughts on what I remembered from the movie. It was more recent in my memory than the book.

Aro gasped in delight. _Is he seeing what I know now? How does his power work? God I can't even remember..._

"How did you do that, my little one?" A shiver traced my spine in repulsion at the pet name.

"Well, you're going to have to tell me what you saw first and then I can connect to what I did to figure it out." I had more bite in my remark then I intended to. But the tense atmosphere was building my nervousness.

Aro arched both eyebrows. He was not used to such a defiant attitude I suspected.

"Sounds like the _engineer _in you." The gleam in his ruby eyes was frightening.

"Sorry Aro, that's only a hint. You need to give me more to go off of."

Aro's sinister smile made my toes crinkle in my already too tight boots.

"My dear, it was enough. Let's have a chat and see what else you can show me. You, little human, have peaked my interest. _Come_. Let's go off somewhere more private." Aro extended his cold and rigid hand to me and I had no other option than to take it. I refused to look back even when I heard enough "No's!" to understand I wasn't the only one weary of where I was being lead to.

Two vampires from his guard attempted to follow us, but Aro shot them both a dark glare and they understood they were to remain where they were. I presumed they were silently instructed to hold the line.

When it was clear only the two of us were carrying on with no other figures, Aro scooped me up in his arms and whisked me to somewhere deep in the woods. Dead trees surrounded us, and I was just as sure as Aro that enough trees separated us from the others that no one else could hear the conversation that was about to unfold.

"You aren't from this world." I shook my head. "You died and were transported here by unknown means." Aro's recap was obviously for himself and not for me.

"I was not trying to show you my past life when you took my hand."

"And what were you trying to show me then, Katie?" Aro asked me amusedly.

"The end of Breaking Dawn." I laughed at the irony at the ridiculous stunt I was trying to pull. To save them all. Because I had no idea where the hell Alice was.

"What is that?"

"If I tried to explain, you would ridicule me. Can I try to show you again? Even though I don't know how I turn on what you can or can't be allowed to see. Sorry I don't remember how your power works."

"From what Carlisle told?"

"Something like that." I smirked and tried to recall who told Bella about Aro's power in New Moon. _Probably Edward. Go figure_.

I extended my hand to Aro. He unexpectedly grabbed it with a passion. He yearned to learn what other juicy secrets I had to hide. I concentrated on my most powerful feeling I remembered when watching part II of Breaking Dawn the movie. When the director threw the audience for a loop and made up a battle scene that ended up just being Alice's vision. I was livid watching it unfold unaware it was not real. I tried to focus on that feeling to see if that allowed him to glimpse at least at that part or anything in my memories invoking Twilight.

A sullen expression did not break from Aro's face while he held my hand and I knew I failed everyone.

"I am better looking in real life, right?" _He saw?! __**Omg! **__He saw! _I clamped my other hand around his and fell to my knees in joy.

"Much better!" I bellowed through my cries of laughter. "Meeting you, I can now see they did you dirty with the actor they cast in your role."

Aro smirked and I felt hope rise in me. Flattery in the moment seemed to be working. But, his feelings towards what he learned was still unknown to me.

"You have lived an interesting life for your young age, Katie. Or do you wish to be called Jessica?"

"Jessica, please," I requested confidently.

"I have a lot to think on. What is your take?"

"I am happy with the opportunity to have a second chance." I smiled, but knew by Aro's expression I only offered a sad smile.

"With which one?" _Huh?_

"What do you mean?"

"My kind or wolf-boy?"

My mouth was slightly ajar while I contemplated his question.

"They both have someone. If you let me live, I just want to do my best to live the best life I can."

"Three conditions." Aro played with the watch on his wrist as he allowed the suspense to build. "One, I get to do a test. For my own amusement. Two, you never tell anyone about Twilight or any humans about Vampires. Three, you have to be with one of the two. You need a tie to the supernatural world, so I know you won't break your word."

I opened my mouth to protest condition three, but Aro held up his hand. My words fell flat on my mouth and only a huff escaped. "Don't worry, condition three will be easier to live with after condition one is performed." Aro clapped his hands together in pleasure before he bounded for me and picked me up.

"Do you agree to the conditions, Jessica? Otherwise, we can get this over with now. Your blood isn't the sweetest I have smelled, but I wouldn't oppose a taste."

"Yes," I cried in defeat. Aro stopped his fangs from doing more than graze the skin on my neck. "Good girl," he whispered before planting a soft kiss on my next. "Let the fun begin." I last saw a wicked smile on his face before we sped back to everyone. When Aro set me down, I concentrated on reorienting my dizzy state before focusing on the scene in front of me. The tension I thought I witnessed before was mere child's play. Any small spark would ignite the powder keg in front of my eyes. Blows were about to be exchanged.

I saw Alice in the distance between Edward and Bella. She began to walk forward. Following her were Edward, Jacob and Renesmee.

Aro was delighted with their decision to approach us. "Stop there." Aro commanded and they all halted and offered confused faces to one another. "How perfect. I could not have asked for a better set-up," Aro sung giddily. He turned to meet my eyes. "Condition 1, Jessica," Aro whispered to me with a flicker of wickedness in his eyes. "Jane, little one. Felix, Jessica."

Renesmee screamed in emotional pain while I cried in physical pain with Felix twisting my arm.

Jacob abandoned Renesmee to be by my side and Edward was running Renesmee back to Bella instantly for her shield. "Enough," Aro commanded. Jane and Felix didn't hide their displeasure with having to stop.

"Well, now you know how to meet condition three." Aro winked at me. "We will be checking in to follow up. After some time, I think we should talk again. I'll try to keep in mind your short human life span."

"Aro! Why-" Aro held up his hand to silence Jane. "Later. I have what I need. We are heading back home now. The child is of no danger to us. She will become a vampire soon enough. As for this human..." Aro smiled as he looked me over again. "We have an understanding." Aro walked over and bent his lips to my ear. Jacob's growl was not loud enough to drown out Aro's parting words whispered to me. "Until we next meet, _Katie Smith_." Aro's lips lightly made contact behind my ear and then he disappeared with the rest of his clan.

Jacob's growl suddenly stopped as I turned around to look at him. His eyes focused on me intensely.

Something happened. **Something big.** I knew I was ready to accept this world fully in my heart after understanding Jenna was okay. But in this moment, my decision was locked in. A key was turned and tossed into the ocean. I was anchored. The last puzzle piece was put in place. The last wrinkle was ironed out. This was it. My new world. I felt at home.

Jacob howled and my concentration on my thoughts broke. He rushed to me and nudged me to climb on his back.

Edward began to say something in the distance, but Jacob snapped at him and Edward winced. Edward took Renesmee's hand and called after Alice to follow them back to everyone else.

I looked at Jacob. I didn't understand what was wrong. Why he wasn't following Rensemee. Jacob ran out among the trees and soon returned in his human form. _Did he have a go-bag stored in a tree branch out there with clothes in it or something?_

"We talk now. **Katie**." My body tensed. The jig was up.

* * *

**LalaLand972's Reponses to Reviews (Alphabetical Order):**

**Brankel1****:** YES! still on a roll of my chapters being hits with you! Thank you for the review!

**Charcoal Chicken:** Yes, I am glad they both can move on and be happy despite their grief! Now that with this chapter Jacob's Arc is caught up…next post will address Edward arc's cliff hanger! :D Thank you for the review!

**CasJeanne: **Although I did end it there…you only had to wait a day to see what happened next ^_^ so not too cruel! Haha Thank you for the review!

**DxGRAYxMAN**: Onion ninjas are the worst! This chapter shouldn't have produced any? If anything, they should return for ch 8 of Edward Arc :O Thank you for the review!

**MiharuTousaka:** More feels to go from this installment! I hope you liked this update as well : ) Thank you for the review!

**silentmayhem****:** I hope things for Jessica were more cleared up with you this chapter! Thank you for your input! I am curious to what you think of katie's direction in this chapter…was it more on par of what you expected? Thank you for the review!

**Wpear:** Yes I am glad you liked it! I like that she got closure to so she can know focus on her own happiness in this Arc. She is young and will screw up. Just because she was 24 when she died doesn't make her an expert in love. I think she is still naive for romantic relationships. But you learn only through experience and being ready for them! Thank you for the review!

**Yomiii21:** I have been tempted to do an alternate ARCs of Edward/Jacob that continue off "But why am I jessica?" but do not go down this complicated path. It is something to think on if people who want to read that or not though. Because there are a lot of places all the stories can go with how that book ended. Thanks for reading and reviewing. I appreciate reader's insight even if it isn't always "I love this chatper update" haha


	18. Edward Arc Ch 8

_**Author's Note i: **Surprise! I snuck time away to finish this because people have been on the edge of their seat to know why Alice did that. Alrighty...it's time for you to find out. Enjoy! [**IMPORTANT NOTE AT END OF CHAPTER. PLEASE READ. Feb/ 8, 2020]**_

**Trigger Warning:** Suicide is briefly mentioned.

* * *

**Jessica's Happily Ever After?**

_Sequel to "But Why am I Jessica?"_

**Chapter 8**

**[Edward Arc]**

"**Five Years"**

_Alice POV_

Everyone was wrong. I was never glitching. Just remembering.

I saw her so often; it was if she had become my own sister. This tall, lonely dark hair girl. She already had a sister though. They had beautiful interactions. Edward never got my fascination with them. They were just visions of strangers after all.

**But we were wrong. **

They were memories.

My past.

Everything I overlooked clicked in place when I saw her tattoo.

_Always_.

Katie. Helena. It came back in scraps, but I knew who I was. I was Jenna Smith. In this life, I wasn't losing Katie again. That was my only singular thought as I drove my teeth into her wrist.

…

I considered Bella to be my sister. I always felt this raw ache, like I was missing something my entire life. More like, I was missing _someone_. At first, I thought it was Jasper, but even once we came to be together it did not diminish my acknowledgment that I was missing a piece of my heart. Then we found our intended family and everything was perfect. The ache was still present. Muted, but present.

When Bella and Edward became a thing, I couldn't contain my excitement over what was to come. I was to gain a sister. Of course, I wasn't discounting Rosalie. But I didn't get the same warm and fuzzy feelings from her that I saw in my future interactions with Bella. The ache was subsiding. But it wouldn't disappear.

Then, my life changed. My hope and future were dashed by a drastic alteration to our future.

**Jessica Stanley**.

I saw her white diamond skin glitter in the sun as she walked down an isle to Edward. They were getting married. Then bursts of images past this scene flooded my mind. Small, tiny snips of no Bella but Jessica in my family.** I was devastated!**

If I could have hid it from Edward I would have, but we were in Spanish together when it happened. The look of horror on his face when my vision finished, I knew he listened in. From there the seed was planted.

What we didn't understand then but what I could put together now, my visions were not for him. **They were for me****. **

I was terrible to Jessica. I wished she had died in that rushing water and went away. I needed her to stop invading my visions. I didn't care about her future. I wanted my sister Bella in mine. But Edward intervened and saved her. After that night, I realized how cruel and selfish I was to risk her life to feel a void in myself I found Bella to be plugging up. I decided to apologize the next day. But that conversation didn't go as I planned. Instead, I was curious to know if she actually wanted to drown. I felt guilty not trying to warn her better before it happened. The warning I offered her was halfhearted. When we walked to her car, I had a vision about us. I called her "Jess" and we looked like friends. I decided to try to play that angle when we talked to one another, but it didn't go over well. She wasn't as much of a bitch as I once thought she was. I wondered how much she really changed after getting hit to her head.

Most of all, **why her**?

Edward left Bella. We all had to leave Forks. It sucked. I missed Bella, but promised Edward I would stay away from her. I had visions of Bella though. They **always** included Jessica. A Jessica that was picking up the pieces of Bella and putting her back together after Edward had left. I wanted to remain angry at Jessica for what she caused, but I eventually lightened up and appreciated the fact that she took care of my sister when I could not help. I was beginning to see Jessica in a different light.

When I had a vision of her in a cemetery...I recognized the place. It was _so familiar._ But I had never been there before. I assumed it was a hidden memory I hadn't recovered after I changed. I debated on telling Edward, but something in my _dead_ heart commanded me to make the call. Jessica was breaking and for some reason I felt like I was breaking with her. My ache was resurfacing at the memory of her crying over grass at an empty grave plot.

Edward changed his mind when I called him and we all went back home to Forks. He returned to Bella and everything should have been back to normal. But it wasn't. I still had visions of Jessica, but held less contempt for her. She didn't seem to be outright encouraging Edward's affection. It was my fault he even noticed her in the first place.

I religiously stayed away from Jessica in hopes it would decrease my frequency of visions of her. **It did not**. And the time I spent with Bella no longer seemed to plug my ache. It had grown wildly and I was desperately hiding it from my family and Jasper. Not Edward though. He knew.

Jessica was kidnapped by Victoria and saved by us. She had become aware of our secret. Which made her a better contender for Edward's heart. When I walked in on the two of them embracing in Edward's room, I surprised myself with support of their newly kindled relationship. Turns out I was wrong and ended up pushing them together by opening the door for Edward to reveal a hard truth.

They got together. I lost Bella. I was sad, but did my best to move forward with the idea that Jessica was now with Edward. It was a hard pill to swallow for so long.

She tried. I tried.

She knew I was not a fan of her, so it made our beginning more difficult. Then as of late, we were on a crash course to our current destination. My "glitch" visions increased after Edward and Jessica became an item. Jessica helped me repair my friendship with Bella, and I realized how unfair I had been to her. I still wasn't happy with her five-year rule, but I respected her for it. It bewildered me that I was not only sad not for Edward, but I was growing sad I would lose her too. Especially when I began to notice how the ache was disappearing when I was in her presence recently.

When I had a vision of the Volturi's visit, I didn't hesitate before I dialed Jessica. No one else knew. I felt compelled to warn her. She deserved to know. Better judgement did not take hold of me in that moment. There was this drive from within that guided my fingers to dial her number on my cell without a second thought. To let her know and help her. She needed to become one of us after all. My _very _first vision of her marrying Edward as a vampire was the only way.

She disappeared on me after I told her. I texted Edward before I rushed off to her school. When we joined forces, her decisions kept changing and my "glitching" was on full force. Edward left frustrated and made me promise to call him when I locked in on her. He was going to try to track her down himself.

When I saw her in the cemetery in Helena, I instinctively drove to her and did not tell Edward. Being there in person was surreal. It seemed _so_ familiar, but I told myself it was just from that first vision. I found myself humming the melody of the song I heard Jessica singing when I was approaching her. But I had **never** even heard it before.

I now understood why. _M__y__ sister_ was singing the song we shared over the loss of our parents. At where our parent's headstone should have laid, and I hadn't remembered.

Then tonight. She shared her history. Our previous life. If she went into more detail, said our names. I wondered if I would have known then. If it would have come back to me the same way it had when I saw her freshly inked tattoo. '_**Always**_'. Its origin came from the last Harry Potter book, but the shared meaning was for the love of our family and each other. We had planned to get that same tattoo on our wrists when I next visited Katie… but then she was killed.

I couldn't remember everything from my past life. It was fragmented over memories that took hold of me at times. Katie was in most of my memories**. Because...she died**. She was hit and killed by a car. My baby sister. **And I never got to say goodbye**.

When I was left alone, I struggled. Five years after her death, I committed suicide. That much I remembered. We found each other again, finally, and I selfishly wasn't letting her go.

"Sorry Katie," I whispered as I maxed out on my speed heading back to the house. The venom was in effect enough it could not be reversed and I needed their help.

...

As soon as my jeep pulled into our driveway, Edward stormed out through the front door of the house.

"**Alice!**" I had never witnessed, until this day, Edward's face struggle to display one emotion as I assumed he was reading my mind. Catching up to speed on my new discovery and what I had done.

"**Fuck.**" Edward never swore either. "Alice, what the hell is going on? Your thoughts are so incoherent. I am not understanding anything much other than the fact **you BIT Jessica**?! And that it is too late to reverse it." Edward's eyes were livid with rage as he approached my car to retrieve Katie. I stood in his path. Blocking him. She was not just his anymore. That he failed to understand still. His set jaw began to slack as he attempted to muscle me out of his way.

I kept my ground blocking off the car's door while I felt our family gather around us.

"Alice, Edward? What is going on?" The concern was unmistakable coming from Carlisle. Esme, Rose, and Emmett stood behind Carlisle. Jasper didn't stop there and approached me. He was trying to calm the atmosphere. They didn't know. No one understood. This was Katie. **My Katie! **Not Edward's _precious_ Jessica.

"Stop it, Jasper!" I snapped sharply at Jasper. I instantly regretted my venomous words when hurt briefly flashed in my mate's gold eyes. I just needed time to think. No, not think. I needed to help Katie. We needed to make her comfortable while the change took hold of her. She couldn't stay here. It was too dangerous. We all needed to leave. I wanted to keep both my families.

"Why are you calling her Katie, Alice?" Edward's question was tinged with curiosity despite the harshness in it. Edward and I didn't fight. Our family was upset. I needed to help Katie. They also needed to understand, so they would help me help Katie. We could all be a family. Like I saw in my very first vision of my sister.

"Jessica was Katie Smith in her last life. _My little sister_. I was Jenna Smith. Edward," my eyes implored him to remember my previous visions and make the same conclusion I had as well a short time ago. "You saw my visions. They were not glitches. I was recalling fragments of my previous life. They were moments shared between Katie and I." I looked out to my family. Watching them attempting to process _more_ new information in one night. "I could not remember my past. What I dug up earlier this year was all I knew. That never would have made me remember my time as Jenna. But when Katie's soul showed up here, it was like my Jenna soul was beginning to remember as well. Or trying to at least."

"Are you sure you have this right, Alice?" Esme asked me in quiet disbelief. Her doubt in my certainty hurt. _Edward had to at least believe me, right Edward?_ I looked at Edward with hope. His golden, normally bright and sparkly whenever Jessica was near, eyes had grown dark. I was not sure what he was thinking, and I couldn't summon any visions in that moment to define our possible future going forward.

I traced back moments in my mind that I relived in the car ride back after biting Jessica. I keyed in on specific pieces that were small hints at my connection to Katie. Invisible to the naked eye until the puzzle was solved. Then when you knew and traced back everything, it all clicked. It all made sense. There was a reason I was Alice and she was Jessica. We were destined to meet in this new life again. The raw ache I had known for so long finally plugged when I realized who was right in front of me this whole time. My Katie. Now we could be a happy family again. With or without the Cullen's. But I hoped with them. Jasper I knew would follow my lead whatever I decided.

"I believe Alice. She showed me what I needed to believe her. But," Edward eyed my jeep with concern. Katie was still inside. She was not screaming anymore. It was more like wailing. It had been difficult to endure listening to it the entire time, but I needed an escape route in case my family didn't agree with me.

"We can't move her inside." Carlisle spoke with an authority that everyone in the family was used to. _But why not?_

"Alice…the treaty. We have broken it. We need to move Jessica somewhere else **now.**" I felt deflated as I forgot there were more consequence to biting Katie to save her life.

"Alice and Edward, you take Jessica to Canada. You know the place. Grab the key's in the coat closet under the loose floor board. Keep her secure while the change takes effect. Emmett and Rose, pack up the house except for what is mine and Esme's. We will take a day or two to close accounts and give the hospital short notice I am taking another job offer again. Take off when you're done and meet Alice and Edward in Canada. Jasper, work on a cover story for Jessica's absence. Let's have her go missing versus dying. It gives her an option to come back and dealing with a fake dead body is not something I want you to have to worry about."

Nobody in our family questioned Carlisle's plan or accused me of ruining our lives to my surprise.

"No Alice, you didn't ruin our lives," Edward whispered quietly. He had a hand on Katie's forehead in the backseat of the jeep while she was squirming in pain. "I mean…you probably saved mine. This is not what she wanted though…"

"I know. But she didn't know I was here with her. I should have told her. When everything clicked, I panicked and thought I couldn't lose her again in this life like I did in our previous one. She said she wanted to see us all again. What if it just wasn't us reincarnated? What if our parents and grandparents were reborn too? She will understand. I am with her. That is all that matters. She means the world to me, Edward."

I suddenly found myself gripped in a tight hug from Esme. "Thank you," she whispered in my ear. Esme got to keep her son. Her son got to keep his mate. Her daughter, me, would be happy with her sister back. It was a dream come true, despite the consequences being dealt with at the moment.

I kissed Jasper before Edward and I took off with Katie. Jasper's wide smile made me feel complete. I felt whole. He knew it too.

Edward and I left our family. I was worried about the cover up. We had done it once before for Bella; we could do it again this time for Katie. She was officially family now. I knew in my heart she would understand everything after she woke up. Well…depending on how her body and mind handled being a newborn. But even if it took a couple of months, she would understand. I was happy with my decision in the end. It was the best choice for us all.

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**IMPORTANT NOTE: As of Feb. 8, 2020. Edward Arc splits into two different paths. A new ending is to be posted in Feb. 2020 for Ch 9. The original Ch 9 ending and the AU storyline sparked from it are contained in its own book, "The Vampire and the ****Wolf". **

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**Author's Note: Do not read if you are not caught up on Jacob's Arc! **_So my take on Jenna is that in each Arc she was affected differently based on what happened to Katie. Being able to said goodbye and it being Katie's choice in the hospital made it livable for her to survive that grief. In this Arc, Katie was hit and killed. Jenna didn't get to say goodbye like what happened with her parent's as well. All the traumatic losses and losing her sister when she believed they would live a long life and she as the older sister would die first had a different affect on Jenna. Especially not saying goodbye. That is why she met a tragic end as Jenna because she could not deal with it anymore. Then she was reborn as Alice..._

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**LalaLand972's Reponses to Reviews (Alphabetical Order):**

_Thank you each for your review!_

**Brankel1****:** Yay for amazing!

**Charcoal Chicken:** Great questions! I love when readers bring up questions sometimes I forget to ask myself when writing lol I didn't originally mean to have so many twists to the story, then I decided to embrace the 'drama' tag for it. ^_^ I hope you enjoyed this update! No jessica's pov, but we will see that in the next Edward arc update.

**CasJeanne: **LOLz! Glad you thought it was wild start to finish! And liked it! 95% sure you meant to say Aro and not Aaron right in ur comment? I loved writing his character in that chapter. Honestly, would like to put him more in the friendship arc if I could get my crap together and write more of it.

**DxGRAYxMAN**: Cat is out! An interesting way for it to occur too, right? Would she have told Jacob otherwise? Hmmmmm...

**JustmePMM**: Thank you for the words of encouragement! I hope you are finally caught up on this story!

**MiharuTousaka:** Agreed! So much suspense! That update is next and halfway drafted :D

**Moose Voose:** 1\. YAY! Glad you appreciate it :D 2. Don't die! That update is coming soon with all juicy secrets to spill! :D

**silentmayhem****:** Great insight! You may have mentioned something I forgot about. I will have to keep that in mind in writing the next chapter haha I have a lot of pieces to figure out for it so a reader can buy it lol

**Yomiii21:** I am glad you liked the turn! You brought up a good point! That and A LOT will be explained in the next update for Jacob's Arc : ) Hopefully by the time you see this post you can read it at a more reasonable hour!


	19. Jacob Arc Ch 8

**Author's Note: **_Friendship Arc has been moved to a new book. __I have two other new stories posted as well. 'Vindicated' one-shot about imprinting. 'The Phoenix' about Bella becoming a stronger version of herself to take on Victoria. Go to my profile to check out each if you want._

_Okay, enough shameless plugs. I rethought this over, next installment will be Jacob's conclusion and then Edward's. **Why?** Edward's is complicated/messy/long and I am going back and forth on my original ending. Also fyi, just because the stories finish in each arc doesn't mean new stories won't be told in each arc : )_

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**Jessica's Happily Ever After?**

_Sequel to "But Why am I Jessica?"_

**Chapter 8**

**[Jacob Arc]**

"**A Million Steel Cables or Roots?"**

My feet shuffled forward following Jacob's lead despite every nerve in my body screaming for me to turn around. _Did Aro do that on purpose? Speaking my name knowing that Jacob would still be able to pick it up with his impeccable hearing? Was this how he planned to pigeon hole me into condition three?! __**Jacob has Renesmee though!**__ I know he can be what she needs, but what if she wants more? What if being just friends is not enough for her as she grows into an adult? My presence only complicates things for them... Maybe we can find some happy ground to meet condition 3? Obviously, I can't be with Edward. I guess in hindsight I should be happy I am both __alive and human__. _

"Hey, are you going to stop ignoring me now?" Jacob's harsh words broke my concentration. We were surrounded by trees. In the thick of the forest. Alone. I felt compelled to step forward and brush Jacobs shaggy long hair away from his beautiful dark eyes. As soon as I caught my hand moving forward, I jerked it back and stopped walking toward him. _What am I doing?!_

"Who is Katie Smith? Is that the secret you mentioned in your letter?" This time Jacob's voice was soft. Concern and curiosity interlaced in his words. He wasn't angry. Something else.

I bit my lip fighting back words that were beginning to form from my mouth. I barely had a moment to process everything for myself since I agreed to Aro's conditions. This was too sudden. I was restricted in what I could say, but I also didn't know how much I wanted to reveal for what I _could_ say. _Tell him everything._ I kicked that preposterous thought back down to whatever hole it crept out from.

"Jess- no Katie? What do I call you!? Please tell me something. Anything!" Jacob pleaded with me desperately. He still wasn't angry. I was surprised by that.

"Jacob...I don't know where to start. And, I have limits."

"Limits?"

"My life depends on the limits of what I can and cannot say. You may understand a little more if I tell you about the name Katie Smith. But if you can't accept there are limits to what I can and cannot tell you for my own mortality..."

"I accept." No hesitation. No protests. Why? Where was mister 21 questions? Jacob's eyes were soft as he continued to not break his gaze upon me. I was entranced by them. Then I looked at my right hand. It was covered by Jacob's. I noticed warmth in it a while ago but when did this happen? Why was I being on the receiving end of his affection? I attempted to bring back my hand into my own possession, but Jacob's grip tightened. "Please," he begged. My heart fluttered and I involuntarily nodded in agreement to allow our hands to stay as they were.

I lowered my head before I softly confessed, "My name is Katie Smith." I waited for Jacob to retract his hand and look at me in disgust. I was a stranger. But he didn't. He kept a firm hold on my hand. He squeezed my hand in request for me to continue. "I am from a different world is what I gather. It's not like a time jump or anything like that. But I am from another world. Still Earth. Some similarities but also differences in who is around. Like my family is not here from that world. Katie Smith does not exist here. I died from wounds I received in a car accident." I looked at Jacob's tan hand still holding mine in bewilderment. He hadn't even hesitated yet to let go. "I should back up. I woke up here as Jessica in the start of senior year after Bella hit her in the head with a baseball bat. However, I was still alive as Katie during this time. Maybe my soul was transported here? I don't know how this all works. When my heart stopped when I got injured in the new born battle, I was transported back to my body as Katie. Then I was pulled off life support. I thought my time here was a dream. Then I woke up in the field. Back here again. You called me back here, Jacob." My voice was trembling. Raw emotion was slipping out despite my fight to remain composed. I wasn't supposed to look weak in telling this. But it was my first time in telling anyone. _And_ I was telling Jacob.

"Then you imprinted, and you know what happened next... I mean it doesn't matter anymore. I am the one who broke our imprint." Jacob's hand still didn't tense or loosen. It was as still as ever. I looked up to his big brown eyes that patiently begged me for more information.

"After the car accident, I was transported to my previous world. Like a spirit. I felt that string on my hand you once described. It was pulling me. Probably back to this world. To you. But I found Jenna..."

"Jenna...the voice I heard in the dark when your heart stopped during the battle?"

I felt the corner of my mouth slightly flick up. "My older sister. I left her alone when I died. Our parents had died. Our grandparents too. It was just us. Then her. I was worried about her, Jacob. And grieving my loss of never seeing her again. I wanted to stay with her. So… I removed the string so I could stay with her. I..." my throat was beginning to close up on my next words. But I pushed through it and croaked out, "...am _so so_ sorry. I needed to be with her, Jake. I had to know she would be okay."

Jacob's hand pulled me into his bare chest. The warmth of his embrace spread into my heart. Melting what walls I had recently put up.

_But he is not mine to have anymore..._

I tried to gently push myself away. My strength faded as he tightened his grip on me. He wanted me there. Me. _**Me**__! Why though? _I snuggled into his neck to enjoy this brief moment of intimacy before we had to break back to reality. I wasn't his imprint anymore.

"You came back." I smiled into his chest before I craned my head up to his face.

"Yes...I did. I now know Jenna is okay. She got her miracle; her saving grace to find happiness despite every awful thing that happened to her. She turned to love even after it was ripped away from her so many times. I found myself wanting my own second chance. This time it came from me though and wasn't an imprint. You are a part of that reason. **You**; not the imprint. Even if we can't be together anymore… you taught me to live and love. I won't forget that, Jacob. You are..." I raised my right hand to touch his warm cheek. I gently caressed it with my thumb. "Beautiful inside and out." I kissed his cheek and wanted so much more in that moment. I restrained myself knowing better though.

"Jess- No, Katie. You _always _assume everything. You **never** ask. You _always_ think you're right. What about me and what I want?" Jacob took my hand that recently withdrew from his face. He pressed his soft lips to it.

"Look I have something big to confess too. Not as big...but you need to know." My eyes widened in shock at what more secrets could we have hid from one another.

"I only left you in the hospital room when you asked because I didn't want to cause you more distress while you were recovering. I felt waiting until after we faced off with the Volturi was the right time to set things straight. I was never going to tell you this...but things are different now." Jacob shuffled his feet on the ground focusing on his breath. He was struggling to find the right words. I knew this trait from the few times I had witnessed it prior. My anxiety was heightening because of it.

"The imprint...was not right." My eyebrows arched in confusion. I already knew this though. It didn't happen at first sight for us. When he heard my heart beat. When I first woke up. That's when it happened. That's when his roots were dug in the ground for me.

"It wasn't the same pull like Sam or Quil. It was...less. _A lot less_. But it was still something." I didn't understand what he was implying. It was not real from the beginning? What we had built was on a lie? Why didn't he ever tell me? Why did I feel the way I did then?

"No one understood, but I didn't lie about how it made me look at you. It took off the blinders that were Bella Swan and made me see who was right in front of me the whole time. So yes I "imprinted", but it was not like you were gravity to me. Or the center of my world by force. It was...by choice."

"What about the pull for me? I felt it Jacob. Even worse after I broke up with you..."

"Jess...that was probably coming mostly from you. Like I said, it was something. But not of the caliber of what the legends describe or what Sam or Quil felt."

"Were you ever going to tell me?" Jacob shook his head with shame etched in every feature of his face.

"I knew I was falling for you. I didn't want to lose you. It seemed like what I did imprint was enough because I had no idea I could love someone so much. Then of course Renesmee happened..."

I should have been losing my balance. My whole world was turned upside down by this news. I felt anchored though…

"I felt guilty I never told you about our imprint after that happened. I felt maybe our weakened imprint bond allowed it to happen. But this hadn't occurred to anyone in our tribe before. I didn't know what to do."

I felt a bitter smile take form on my lips. My disappointment couldn't be hidden, and I felt disgusted in myself for letting Jacob see how it affected me. "Well now you don't have to make a choice." My still voice at least didn't betray me.

If Jacob was any other boy in this world, I would have held onto him and never let him go. But he was not. He was Jacob Black and always destined to imprint on Renesmee.

"**You're right.**" The confidence in Jacob's voice fired a million arrows into my heart. Thank god I didn't let it show.

My face was soon wrapped in Jacob's hands. He must have been holding me with affection out of guilt. _Don't feel guilty, Jacob. _

"It's just you."

My body went still as Jacob's warm breath just released words I never thought I would hear again. My lungs couldn't remember how to breathe. _What does he mean?_

"What?"

"You, Katie Smith. **You** are my imprint. Whatever happened before, I don't give a rat's ass. This time it's only you."

Jacob smiled at me in a big way that made my heart swell, and it knew his words were true. However, my brain was lost over what I missed. What it didn't process since I came back.

"My pull to you before was like a rope. Then with Renesmee it was like a second rope was pulling me in the opposite direction. Neither were how imprinting was supposed to work." Jacob kissed my forehead while I stayed immobile wondering how this ends.

"For my people, words are a powerful. What I gather is when your soul officially came here after you died as Katie, I did what I am going to call a 'soft' imprint. It wasn't official or locked in. Maybe you were never supposed to be here in the first place and originally Renesmee was supposed to be my imprint. I don't know."_ I did though._ "Or Care. You were brought here. My wolf recognized you. But there was a problem that was solved today."

"What was that?"

"_Your name_. Your true name and existence was never spoken into this world when your soul was fully released here. _Katie Smith_...". The way my name rolled of his tongue was magical. I never put much stock into my name until I heard him speak with a foreign tenderness. "You are my imprint. **My true imprint.** My gravity. My world. After the _damn_ vampire spoke your name and we locked eyes, all my ties were cut from this world _and_ Renesmee. It was like a million steel cables anchored me to you. J_ust you_. **Only you.**"

Just as Jacob finished, I bridged the small gap between our faces, and I kissed him with everything I had. His lips slowly nibbled mine at first until we both released the hunger we had for missing this touch for so many months. Jacob Black was mine, and I was his. My body was driven by lust as we fell to the grass and proceeded to move to the furthest physical intimacy we had reached in Europe. Jacob stopped and looked into my eyes. His brown eyes burned with a fire I never wanted to douse out again. He gently tugged at my lower lip before kissing my forehead. "Not here. Not like this for our first time." I nodded my head as I breathlessly agreed to his surprising self-control. If he had wanted me here and now, I would have gone for it.

I was his imprint.

"When I was young, my mother told me life is a book and you are the author of your own story. That being said, you are the best chapter in my book. **You**. Not defined by any imprint, Katie. Without you, my story is empty. The words are meaningless. **I don't care if you are from another world.** If you let me, I'll be here to help you pick up the pieces_. I love you._ In this world and on **every** and _any_ world. It's you. Just you for me. In this life or another.** I choose you. **And will _always_ find a way to you. _I love you._" Jacob's strong arms wrapped around me and I didn't ever want to leave them again. I felt hope reignited in my soul. _He knew. _He _finally _knew who I was. Just him…

_**Oh shit!**__ Edward must know too! But HOW MUCH?_

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_Authors' Note:__ Ch 9 conclusion will cover what Edward knows and what that means for their love story going forward. If I did a shit job this chapter, let me know. I can edit. I kept wondering if I made the right call but as of now I can't imagine this conversation going any differently then as is. UR review could change my mind cuz I am a softy and care what people think T_T_

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**LalaLand972's Reponses to Reviews (Alphabetical Order):**

_Thank you each for your review!_

**angelacorus1****:** I know she is suffering but chapter 9 will turn it around for her in each arc! : )

**annarank****:** His update is in the works! But it will be a little bit. It is long and complicated, and I have to feel confident in my ending :/ It will come though!

**Charcoal Chicken:** Glad you were surprised! I lightly hinted but didn't want readers to guess the reveal! I am glad you found this story awesome! Hope you enjoyed the aftermath in this chapter! : )

**DxGRAYxMAN**: You were the first to review on Edward Arc ch 8 and I could not have been any happier with your comment! You brought up a good point…I am second guessing rearranging chapters when I finish. I don't want to leak any spoilers since I respond to reviews…So I won't be doing that after all! When I withdrew friendship arc from this book but left the chapter's still in place. If anyone has suggestion though, I am willing to listen (or read them)!

**MiharuTousaka:** I commend you for holding out as long as you did! I agree with you on hit/miss with Edard romances. I am glad you found the twist in this arc making it worth your time to read ^_^ It is kinds sweet that she gets this second chance with her…right?

**Moose Voose:** Luckily no one did! I would have been impressed if they had! Lol And glad you can believe it too. I hope Jacob's arc update was enjoyable for you after the wait!

**silentmayhem****:** Lol when I reread the chapter after your comment I was like, "maybe Alice/Jenna **is **a little insane" haha! It will be interesting to see how Katie/Jessica reacts. Which I am struggling the most with my ending. Each comment I read through gives me insight to what other people see versus what I see for an ending here. So, thank you for what you wrote, it definitely gave me more to think on as I draft. ^_^

**stonebridge****:** They are reunited ^_^ And…you asked good questions. Ch 9 will include it all! No Rosalie POV though. I was hesitant on even doing an allice pov for this story but felt it was necessary. However, in other Edward Arc stories I will think on doing that. I think Roselie would be a challenge to write a POV for to be honest.

**rosemeiness****:** Glad you are loving it ^_^ stay tuned for her reaction in the conclusion of Five years! :

**Wpear:** Glad you liked that twist! I had that planned since chapter 3 when I started thinking about my long term story ^_^ the conclusion of the arc will reveal how Jessica reacts! Stay tuned!

**Yomiii21:** I know crazy twist! I like that I could surprise my readers! Honestly the arc had to play out with Jessica's attitude with how she felt about not wanting to be a vampire or the reveal would not have been as dramatic I felt. Also thought it was in her character to feel how she did. Ch 9 we will see her reaction! Glad you could review this story at a reasonable hour this last time! : )


	20. Jacob Arc Ch 9

**Jessica's Happily Ever After?**

_Sequel to "But Why am I Jessica?"_

**Chapter 9**

**[Jacob Arc]**

"**A Million Steel Cables or Roots?"**

We were on our way back to everyone. In the silence, I was working on my explanation and trying to diminish my need to jump to conclusions about what Edward knew. I honestly believed that Aro would not have been that careless when we returned to let Edward know about the Twilight Saga. He knew of Edward's power… Amongst all these problems, one still haunted me. I had to let it be known.

"Jacob." Jacob stopped in his tracks. Panic flashed across his face as he turned to face me. My tone of voice gave me away.

I inhaled bravery and exhaled my anxiety.

"I know I gave you only a brief summary of who I am, but I am a fraud here as Jessica Stanley. I wasn't who you thought for so long. Don't you hate me?" I felt my left arm cross my torso. My right hand would have followed suit, if Jacob's hand wasn't still gripped around it.

Jacob tugged me into his chest. I felt secure. I knew his answer before he was to speak on it. Nonetheless, I needed to hear it. I selfishly required the reassurance to absolve the guilt.

"It is who you are the calls to me. Not the body you are in. I love you for who you are, Katie." I gulped and felt my heart for once not just beat for me but Jacob as well. "Later after we meet back up with everyone, I want you to tell me all about it, Katie. I want to know about you. From this life and in the previous. _All of you_. You are **my imprint**. But I **choose you **as my lover. I **love you**." My guilt over every wound I ever inflicted on the sweet man in front of me reassuring me of his love, poured out of me.

Jacob released me from his embrace and put his hands on my face. He began to brush away my tears. It was currently a lost cause. They would not stop. "Hey, hey, Katie. What is it?" Jacob's concern added another thick layer to my mile-high stacked guilt.

"I – _hiccup_ – I…" I swallowed my insecurities and laid everything on the table for Jacob. As he deserved.

"I pushed you away. I gave up on us because I was scared of you leaving me with your imprint on Renesmee. I never talked to you about it, but just assumed I was in the right." _I have been ruining my chance at a happy life by relying on a storyline. This isn't a story anymore though. Jacob is real. My family and friends are real. This is my second chance. _"My last relationship in my last life, I was left for another girl. I was his back-up plan. I couldn't bear to be that with you. Not with how strongly I felt. When I stopped focusing on you for once since I woke up here again, I began to realize I never fully processed my death in my last life and leaving Jenna. That was breaking me, and I could not talk about it at all which amplified my pain."

"You can talk to me about it now." I blinked away tears blurring my site. I looked at a pair of sincere eyes that reflected empathy for my loss. I smiled reassuringly at Jacob. I knew the truth in his words.

"I will. Thank you. I appreciate that. You have no idea." Jacob planted a chaste kiss on my lips. It was a physical promise of comfort he was offering me. After he pulled away from my face, I continued.

"When I came back from my time spent with Jenna, I wanted to fight for you. Us. But…" I felt my heart squeeze in regret. "However, when I recalled at what cost, I knew I didn't deserve you. I am a terrible imprint. Jacob, you deserve better."

I witnessed Jacob suck in air immediately. He misunderstood though. "Jacob Black…"

I tugged his face back to mine. His dark eyes peered into my own. He made a weak attempt for a smile. He was hesitant on what to expect next from my mouth. "I will do better. I am going to be what you deserve. No more running away for me or giving up when things get tough. And not because of the imprint, but because you are worth my fight _all the time_."

I reached for Jacob's hand closest to me and rose it into the air. Adjacent to my face. "Why? Because…" I trailed off. Jacob had a sharp focus on our clasped hands that I was calling his attention to.

"I." I squeezed his hand. His eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

"Love." I squeezed his hand again. His eyebrows relaxed and his eyes began to double in size.

"**YOU.**" I squeezed his hand for the final time. The smile that broke out on Jacob's face made my heart leap with joy. It was the only face I ever wanted to influence on him. As unrealistic as that was.

Jacob wrapped me into his arms and lifted me into the air. His lips covered every inch of my face aside from my own lips. When I began to pout in disappointment, he caved in. I felt my face flush from the warmth being spread in my entire body by the shared love emitting from Jacob and myself.

Too soon, Jacob sent me down. "Crap," he muttered.

"What?"

"Breaking off this a second time was a lot more difficult." He chuckled after planting his soft lips on my hair.

"Oh…I couldn't tell," I remarked while attempting to drown out my own internal arousal as well.

Jacob arched is right eyebrow. "Like me to prove it to you?" His cocky words provoked my eyes to drift to his crotch area. I was positive a blush immediately painted my cheeks.

"**Nope!**" I squeaked as I ran off ahead of him. "To be continued!"

…

I looked out the window of my room and saw Edward's volvo parked out front. It was time. I had been preparing for this conversation over the last 24-hours. When Jacob and I returned to regroup with the others after our conversation, Edward had covered it all. He fabricated a lie that I was able to convince Aro to wait and check in later on for Renesmee's growth to a full adult. Edward explained Aro was fascinated by the imprint bond of the wolves and wanted to test things out. Aro uncharacteristically had a fondness to see how my life unfolded, so they would return. The relief of most of the witnesses and Cullen's surprisingly led to no further digging for the too simple explanation, in my own opinion. But Edward could read minds; he would have built a better cover up, if it was required. The many times Edward and I caught glances of one another, unspoken questions lingered unnoticed by all. Before we parted ways, Edward slipped me a note. He was going to pick me up today and at the present time. We needed to talk. I agreed. The secrecy of the conversation was of the utmost importance as well.

Edward greeted me with a gentle smile when I slipped into the front passenger seat of his car. I didn't know how to start. Despite all my planning, my concern of the fine line I was about to walk to uncover what I needed to know…demolished any plans I had made prior to sitting where I was.

I pulled myself from getting buried in my thoughts by looking at the mile meter. We had clocked two miles since I first got in, and nothing had been spoken still.

"Now _both_ of our questions have been answered," Edward remarked carefully. I was in disbelief over the pleasant tone just released from his mouth. But I also didn't understand what he meant.

"What do you mean Edward?"

"Why you are different and why I care." Edward turned to look at me and the pleasure on his face spread from his smile to his eyes. _Holy shit. He is right. Our conversation from that dinner in Helena…_

"So, you know about me really being Katie Smith… how do you feel about that?" My insecurities were blinding while I asked my question.

"It explains a lot and it makes sense for your personality shift. Though I must admit I did buy that the hit to the head shifted your personality."

"You and everyone else."

"You are Jacob's true imprint now I see." I nodded my head. A question popped up in my brain immediately that I had to ask.

"Did you know? That it wasn't a true imprint or official with what he had with Renesmee or myself initially?" Edward sighed and shook his head. His acceleration picked up with the county roads we now found ourselves winding down.

"No. He didn't ever show any signs to me. I think he learned to control what thoughts to not think on when I am around. It's understandable but still frustrating. And then there is you Katie…Nothing. You are just like Bella. Unreadable." I smirked at Edward's disappointing tone.

"You know, I often wondered how different things would have turned out if you had been able to read my mind and know I was Katie all along. But…as I said before, dwelling on what if isn't healthy. But Edward…" I noticed Edward's hands tense a tighter grip on his steering wheel. He was bracing himself. But for what?

"Is there anything else you know? From what you heard from Aro?" My hands clung to the seatbelt around my waist with a fierce intensity.

"In the field, I read Marcus's mind. He couldn't clearly read Jacob's relationship with you or Renesmee. However, Marcus did pick up on that your relationship was waiting in the shadows and the size of it was unfathomable for him to recognize. As for Aro, I saw Aro's insight into your time as Katie. What you showed him wasn't everything, but enough to rouse his interest. He knew that no one else knew, so he wanted to pick your brain without me being able to read anything. He didn't have to go far for me to lose hearing of his thoughts. When he returned…he was clever. Despite his words he said aloud, he thought in code. He kept just repeating condition 1 and then condition 3. When he stopped, he warned me…I better make up a good excuse for how you avoided conflict with the Volturi or your blood would be on my hands. He also noted I am not allowed to dig deeper on what happened between you and him when I am with you. They will return to make sure of everything we are both held to." Edward pulled over to the side of the road while we were in the middle of nowhere.

"You saved my family. Alice knew you would too. She saw it but she needed to be absent for it occur. I know I cannot ask what you said or did, Katie. But you have my gratitude forever. Because of you we avoided bloodshed. We lost no one. I don't care if you're Katie pretending to be Jessica, if this is the life you want please continue to live it. You are the guardian angel I never deserved."

"No Edward-" Edward cut me off before I could refuse his praise.

"For once, please just accept the compliment, Katie. Also, I like the name Katie. I assume you will go forward being called Jessica, but both suit you. Today, I learned the importance of what my family means to me. I love you, Katie. However, I am going to leave you behind once we finish this car ride. When I drop you off and you close that door, I am closing the door on you as well. Going forward, I want to be just your friend."

My smile grew with every confident word pouring from Edward's lips.

"But of course, Edward. _Always_ friends. I am happy for you three. You will all have a beautiful life together." _Or so Stephenie Meyer led the readers to believe…ugh. __**Quit it!**__ Stop referring to this life as a god damn story line! _A course of worry seized through me when I thought more on that family of three. _Renesmee!_ "How will Renesmee fair without the imprint?"

Edward's eyes lit up with my thoughtful question. I could tell he appreciated my concern despite my selfish desire to be Jacob's only imprint. "She is too young to really understand it all. They were friends and they will still be friends. I prefer it that way too." I giggled at the father figure I rarely saw peak out in my interactions with Edward.

"Good." We didn't say another word to each other on the drive back. Instead, we reflected in a comfortable silence as two friends are capable of doing. When he dropped me off at my house, my heart was content.

…

Jacob's hand softly wrapped around my waist. He pulled me in tighter towards his body. I laid my head on his chest and indulged in our perfect moment of peace as we watched Edward recite his vows to Bella. They were renewing their vows to one another today on New Year's Eve.

Jacob bent his head towards my head and sniffed my hair. "Weirdo," I whispered lightly. His soft chuckle carried to my ears. "Can't help it. You smell _so_ good."

"Noted." I clicked my tongue. "Jacob prefers two days of unwashed hair on me," I narrated aloud to myself. Jacob took another strong whiff. I elbowed him in protest of his newly adapted weird habit.

"Not that, Jess." He picked his head back up and refocused his eyes to the ceremony. He lowered his voice. "With the new imprint, you have this overpowering scent of being..._mine_."

"I am not a _possession_," I growled for an imitation of what Jacob does when he gets irritated. Jacob swiftly pressed his lips on my forehead.

"Down girl. Poor word choice." He squeezed my waist in attempt to break the tension. I fought his attempt to tickle me by muffling my ill-timed laugh.

"Jake, stop!" I whispered with a fierce threat of trouble if he continued to be a disruption to the ceremony.

"Okay. Last thing, it's just you smell great. Fantastic. And, I love you. Very much. I'll be a good boy now." Jacob stole a kiss from my lips in defiance of my hard stare of disapproval.

I elbowed him one more time for good measure before I grabbed his hand around my waist and began to stroke his fingers. _God, I love him so much. _But I wasn't stupid enough to let him know how wrapped around his fingers he had me. I had to put up a strong front. Somehow, I suspected he knew though. I bit my inner cheek to diminish the pull to allow a smile break out on my face. I wanted to extend the pouty face he was deliberately displaying for just a little bit longer.

...

Jacob drove me back to his house following the ceremony. It had been small and intimate this time unlike their wedding. No lavish reception followed either. After the blessing of their re-commitment to one another was over, they left us in a heartbeat on their second honey moon. It was a good choice.

Jacob led me to his backyard instead of taking me through the front door of his house. I was confused to what Jacob wanted to show me. I was not dressed for lingering in the cold for long with my heels, floor length dress and light cardigan.

After he pulled me into the center of his backyard, my eyes were drawn to a small tree I hadn't noticed before. I concentrated on the soil around it. It had been recently disturbed. I drew closer to the tree before feeling Jacob wrap his arms around my shoulders. He must have noticed my light shivering from the cold.

"This little guy is an empress tree. The tree to the right is one as well. We planted it when my mom died." The larger tree was bare now, but I knew its beauty to come in the spring. _Why did Jacob plant this little tree though?_ "This tree right here is to honor your family, Katie. The Smiths'. I know it's not a headstone in Montana, but I wanted you to have something here in this world."

I reached forward to touch the young tree's trunk and began to cry. "Jacob, I am speechless…" I wiped my eyes. "Thank you. This is perfect. I couldn't imagine a better place to honor them then next to your mom."

…

I had one week left until I had to be back at school. I was attempting not to be glued to Jacob and spend time with my family and friends over the course of the break. I was doing a shitty job of that but felt I had a lot of missed time to make up with him. Today I found myself at Sam and Emily's. It wasn't one on one time with Jacob, but I didn't mind. Just being near Jacob was more than enough. I didn't need his attention all the time. I would never be _that girl_.

Emily was inside cooking per usual. I offered to help many times, but she refused and insisted I rest. Thus, I found myself on her porch. Sitting and watching.

I watched Jacob laughing with the pack. _His_ pack now. What I missed out on while I was absent from their lives was that both packs merged, and Jacob was their Alpha. A large responsibility was on his shoulders. Now that I was officially his imprint, I felt the pack's eyes always on me as well. Watching. Either they wanted to make sure I was safe, _or_ they were scared I would inflict severe damage on Jacob again. This time...it would be worse for both of us. He anchored me and I was gravity to him. They all were nice to me. Kind in fact. But they had a guard up. I didn't blame them. Jacob was blind to it. It was all better left unmentioned.

Jacob's bellowing laughter called me from my thoughts. His dark eyes were sparkling as he held Embry in a head lock. I missed out on observing what caused it, but Jacob's joy rolled over to the whole pack and me. It was infectious.

In that joy, my mind wondered to our future. What joy we would find there. It was a bad path to venture down despite my good intentions. Something inside me began to pose important questions I hadn't wanted to ask…**yet.** _How will things go when I am back at school? Would Jacob go to college next fall or stay in La Push? Is our future here after school?_

Panic worked its way into my heart. I concealed it on the outside. No one could know these thoughts randomly troubling me now while I _am_ happy. Jacob's laughter swiftly died, and he turned his full attention to me. The pack's eyes followed his. I was center stage for some reason. Jacob released his hold on Embry and strolled to me.

I offered a weak smile. _Damn imprint bond. Of course, I am always ruining shit lately. _

Jacob's forehead creased in concern. His lips held in a straight line before he spoke. "Everything okay?"

"Yeah of course!"

Jacob adamantly shook his head at me. "You can't lie like before, Jess. I can feel it." He pressed his right hand on my heart. I resisted the urge to roll my eyes or make a bitter retort. I couldn't hide _any_ secrets now. It's almost on par as if I was dating Edward and he could read my damn mind.

"Can we talk later?" I whispered my question lightly despite knowing the pack could hear my every word.

Jacob released a heavy sigh. "If you don't share now, I won't be able to enjoy myself." Well this sucked. My emotional spectrum affected him to this degree. This was new to me in a relationship. It was even at an unfathomable higher level than we had before.

I had to admit one truth and bury the rest for now. I prayed that he could buy that, and I could feel better with one more thing off my chest.

"I am sorry. My mind suddenly wondered to think about what happens with us when I go back to school."

Jacob's dark eyes lit up with relief. I offered him enough for him to enjoy himself again with his friends. That made me overjoyed and I knew he could feel that too.

"I have a plan for that. Okay, we will talk about that later. I am glad that's all it was." Jacob leaned over to kiss me on my forehead. He proceeded to grab my hand and pull me over to the pack. He demanded I join in on the fun. I obliged. It was Jacob, and I wanted to make him happy. I promised to him and myself I would do better to deserve him. And I meant it.

We would answer all my questions together one day. I would make it work out between us because I chose for it to.

I looked up to the sky and imagined Jenna being happy in parallel somewhere. I would see her again someday. After this life. But for now, this second life was going to be the best life I could have for myself. I had the guy. The great family and friends. Now I just needed to figure out what I needed to accomplish for myself in this life to maintain that happiness.

* * *

**Author's Note: **

While this story **"A Million Steel Cables or Roots?" **is over in Jacob's Arc, this doesn't mean other stories will not occur. No idea what story line or when…but I don't want to stop writing about them haha So, if you as a reader want to pose any ideas, I am willing to read them. I can't guarantee I will write on them, but if I feel the prompt and think I can write it, I would go for it. And of course, give you credit for the idea. So, I hope you enjoyed this story for them! If you are a reader who hasn't reviewed yet, I would love you know what you thought of the overall story in Jacob's Arc if you have thoughts to share. I always intended Jacob and Jessica to get back together. This story went darker than I first imagined and was hard to write at times, but I had different versions of the previous chapter written for a while. So, it gave me courage to write because I knew where they would eventually end up. Thank you for reading, following, favoriting and reviewing. I enjoyed the challenge of writing this story and making this Arc happen. I really enjoyed it, and I hope you did as well. – Lalaland972

* * *

**LalaLand972's Reponses to Reviews (Alphabetical Order):**

_Thank you each for your review!_

**angelacorus****:** Estoy feliz para Jessica y Jacob too! Took long enough to get here haha Hope you enjoyed this final chapter in this story for them!

**brankel1****:** Thank you! : )

**CasJeanna****:** Haha glad it kinda makes sense! I was always iffy but that was the only thing that came to mind of how I could break and reform the bond hahaha But overall, yay!

**Charcoal Chicken:** YAS! Glad you enjoyed it! Wasn't a fan of the imprinting in the story either. I never would have throne it in without this ending. I hope you enjoyed this ending and I am happy you appreciate my quick updates! I do my best without trying to diminish quality lol

**DxGRAYxMAN**: You made a good about his mile range for reading minds! I hope my explanation in this chapter was sufficient! If not, let me know. I can always revise!

**Guest**: I love it too! Made it into its own book which will be a longer and more juicy story! It is in the works ^_^

**MiharuTousaka:** Lol yeah _kinda_ normal. But I like that she gets the real imprint and not the off-version she received in the end Jacob ending of "But Why Am I Jessica?". I hope you enjoyed the ending of this story for them!

**Moose Voose:** I know, FINALLY! I am glad you caught on to that. I am very on board with the choice versus being the imprint bond that forces them to eventually choose each other. I am happy for her too! Hope you enjoyed the ending!

**Wpear:** I love reading it each time! Thank you for enjoying my writing style! Glad you enjoyed the last chapter. I would never have left the imprint on Renesmee. It will not happen on any arcs! Haha and I agree! I am glad in this ending she gets to keep her family with no hitches!

**Yomiii21:** I am glad you enjoyed the last chapter! More truth in this chapter and Jessica finally got to declare her love/fight for him. I hope you liked the ending!


	21. Edward Arc Ch 9

**Author's Note: **_I rewrote this chapter for this Arc __**because**__ …after some time and self-reflection, I felt like I owed it to the Edward Ending 12-1 in BWAIJ. I heavily revised that ending recently and it made me re-fall in love with their storyline. Also, I realized this ending may never be perfect no matter how many times I try to rewrite. It is what it is. The original Ch 9 is posted in "The Vampire and the Wolf" since it is essential for that story's AU plot line._

* * *

**Jessica's Happily Ever After?**

_Sequel to "But Why am I Jessica?"_

**Chapter 9**

**[Edward Arc]**

"**Five Years"**

_Where am I?_

My head shifted around the room in an erratic pattern as I tried to remember.

My thoughts toppled over one another trying to decode what I could last recall happening to me. My concentration on solving the mystery tapered as my attention was narrowing

to the raw ache in my throat. I was parched, _dying_ to quench my thirst. It felt like I had been without water for days. But no, that was wrong. I didn't want water…_I want- need to drink blood._

Irrepressible, I burst across the room at an inhumanely impossible speed. I knew what I was. But I had to visually confirm it. I stared at the mirror in front of me. I must have woken up in a nightmare because the face staring back at me is incomprehensible. Reverting to a familiar trick, I pinched my pale, translucent to verify it was mine. The twinge of pain that resulted from the pinch transported me back to waking up in the nurse's office after getting hit in the head in PE. I am more repulsed than captivated by my _almost_ pore-less skin complexion and tamed, wavy hair. When I focused on my eyes… the crimson color reflecting in the mirror taunted me to remind me I was thirsty.

Chaos enslaved my mind. I snarled before smashing the mirror with my fist and breaking down the door to the room and looking for my exit. I couldn't ignore it anymore. I needed to satisfy my desire for blood. Any form of it would do. Any kind. _That's a lie. _From anyone. Just a drop. Just a taste.

Before I could travel further down the hallway outside of the room, a woman cut off my path. I knew her. _**I recognized her**_. _Alice_. I remembered what she did, but what trumped that abhorrent memory all in the moment was my need to feed. I bulldozed her over on my way to find my reason for being. It was all consuming. The need. The want. The hunger. Everything before didn't matter.

I knew it wouldn't be so easy. Once I stumbled upon my last exit, I had the rest of the Cullen's blocking my way out. Except _him_. He wasn't here. Where was he?

_Blood is more important. _

"Out of my way," I growled. "I don't care if I hurt you to get what I want." I began to run at them full force, recalling my strength would outmatch theirs anyways. Two seconds before our imminent collision, they all moved away and Edward was the only obstacle in my path.

I stopped. For a fraction of a second, I wavered. And I knew they counted on this because the next thing I knew, the whole family was on top of me holding me down and I wanted to shred them all into tiny little pieces.

I was prevented from doing this as I heard Edward's voice whisper lightly in my ear while my world faded to black but not my thirst. That was still there.

The days to follow, all I knew was suffering. Physically. Mentally. Emotionally. They force fed me animal blood which tasted like skin milk when all you wanted was whole mike. I was Jessica. I was Katie. But now I was battling with this new persona inside of me. She craved blood. She was obsessed with the power that came with being a vampire. But she had to contend with Jessica who hated what was stolen from her and Katie's desire to see her family again. I felt fragmented. Split. All three personalities battled each other within me on a daily basis.

They insisted I was in no state for conversation, so I counted my time passing with my "allotted" meals.

And that's how it remained. For days. Or maybe months. It wasn't fair though because Alice cheated. She was waiting for a vision where she probably talked to a calm Jessica and not an irate one. That would never happen. What she did was inexcusable. Unforgivable. And I had to bide my time until that occurred. At this rate, I could be spending centuries confined in chains.

...

As time passed on, I understood their rational behind their actions. I was a blood thirty monster who was blinded by my primal urge to drink human blood. If I had submitted to that urge and one day turned to the state I am today, I would have never forgiven myself. And on this day with that realization and acceptance, Alice entered my room for the first time. I hadn't seen her since the first day my transformation was complete. For however long I had been in here, I had only been seen by Esme who delivered my "meals".

"Where's Edward?" I demanded when she closed the door.

"This isn't about you and him. It's about you and me," she whispered as she glided forward to me. The chains they obtained from the Volturi had done their job well. I hadn't been able to escape once since they tied me up. I suspiciously eyed the key she clenched in her right hand. She was putting her trust in me not to rip out her throat. If I did, she wouldn't have seen that. I smirked at my ability to blindside her if I wished.

"Yeah, I saw that outcome." Alice forced the key in the first lock and my right hand was free. I rubbed it with my chained left hand and contemplated if I should enact what she saw. "You don't do it, _Katie_."

I pulled back my free hand and slapped her across the face with all the strength I could muster. "You have no right to call me that," I screamed while I watched her body fling across the room like a rag doll. My voice trembled in fury while I waited for more chains to be unlocked. I would destroy Alice for what she destroyed for me. I glared at Alice after she picked herself up off the ground and returned to my side.

"But I do," she quipped when she unlocked the chain wrapped around my right ankle. I sneered in response to dare her to prod me more. To encourage my need to kill her here and now. Yes, they spared me the guilt from killing an innocent human. But Alice wasn't innocent, and I thought I could stomach her death for the rest of eternity. I doubly affirmed it subconsciously when my left foot was free and there was just one more lock to go. My freedom and revenge were in reach with one more twist of a key.

"The tattoo on your wrist. We were supposed to get it together when I came back to visit you in Kansas City during Labor Day weekend." I forgot what it was like to miss a beating heart. If I had one, it would have stilled or rapidly sped up because I didn't understand what Alice was saying. Or did I?

"I had only left you five hours earlier to drive home and then it happened. You were killed by a car that hit you. The paramedics said it was instant. No pain, Katie." I looked up to Alice's face and observed her eyes. They were gold. But when I squinted, they transitioned to a light green shade. Her hair grew out past her shoulders and it was a dark brown instead of black. She had a dimple on her cheek and a faint scar under her bottom lip when I accidentally pushed her into the corner of my bedroom dresser.

"_Je...Jenna_?" I croaked as I fell back to hit my cot. I barely registered the click marking my freedom.

"I am so sorry," Alice blubbered as she fell to her knees and pressed her cheeks between my knees. "It clicked when I saw your tattoo in the car. All my visions of you in this life and our past. I freaked out, Katie. I imagined losing you again and I reacted without thinking."

My fingers combed through her short, spikey hair as my mind strained not to split into two processing what she told me.

Alice. Was. Jenna.

_My_ Jenna. _My_ older sister.

We were reincarnated here in this world and couldn't recognize each other.

An avalanche of memories collided in my heart and soul as I recalled my time when I believed I was_ just _Katie Smith. I promised myself if I found Jenna in this world, I would leave the Stanley's and start over with her. I dreamed of her. I missed her. I grieved her. But here she was. In front of me the whole time. As my boyfriend's sister.

_Seriously, what the fuck. _

I once had everything all figured out. I remembered my last life to be a better Jessica Stanley in this life. But here Jenna was, dredging up the past I thought I had let go.

_Could our parents be here too? And what about my family in this life, the Stanley's?_

"What do you remember, Jenna?" I was surprised I was able to verbalize anything. But I needed to understand what the hell happened. Was there no such thing as an afterlife? Were you just reincarnated in other worlds and possibly tied to souls from your previous life? I couldn't pretend I understood anything anymore. Not with Jenna here and as real as my Katie self.

"Fragments. Pieces. Mostly it focuses on my memory of our time spent together."

"Does the word Twilight ring a bell?" It was a long shot at this point, but I wanted to ask and know how clear her memory of the past was. Alice shook her head and I was left alone in my never-ending conundrum if I ever would reveal the Twilight series to the Cullen's or not. At this point, there was no semblance of the story anymore to go off of. Would it ever benefit them knowing they were characters in a book from my world? I was here and so was Jenna. _What concept of reality is there to believe anymore?_

Alice called me from the whirling thoughts of my existential crisis. _Or is it Jenna? What do we call ourselves?! _

"Katie?"

"Jessica and you're Alice. It would be better if we just kept those names here in this world. I am sure you can understand what it's like feeling like two souls inhabit one body." Alice nodded solemnly.

"Can I call you Jess now?" My throat bubbled with a small, carefree laugh and I affirmed that she could with a swift pat on her spiky hair.

"You've just been itching to call me that for so long. I guess I am a sucker for a sibling's term of endearment for me." My voice dropped at the end. I remembered Daniel and how he delighted in calling me "_Jessie_". I choked out an elongated sob before leaning forward to rest my head on top of Alice's head.

Once again, I was forced to grieve for the loss of a family. I couldn't risk endangering them with the same risk I suffered. Die or become a vampire.

And I knew Alice understood and didn't move an inch as I cried. As time passed and my cascading tears started to let up, I marginally recognized Edward taking Alice's place to comfort me.

...

**7 years later.**

I kept my promise to myself. I stayed away from my family. To keep them safe. But every once in a rare while I went to visit Forks incognito. Checking in on their lives. Adding some good luck into their lives where I could when the opportunity presented itself. The great snowstorm in 2010. I shoveled the driveway before my parents were up and getting ready for work. Every time I came back, I placed a twenty-dollar bill along Daniel's walking path from school to the house. I made little marks where I could. Just to make their days a little better. A little happier. The grieved but they survived. Just as I always had hoped.

This visit was a little more sentimental for me. Daniel was graduating from high school and he had snagged valedictorian. Just like me.

I arrived first for a private moment observing them. Edward, Alice and the rest of my family would be here shortly for the joyous occasion. We had endowed Daniel a scholarship from a fund set up in Edward's given last name, Masen. It was a bogus scholarship that was just a back end way to give him monetary support. He was going to Yale in the fall and I couldn't be prouder of what he was making of himself. Even as I watched in the shadows.

When I arrived at the house, nobody was home. I assumed I missed the departure by only a few minutes. I ran through my head they probably repeated a similar timing pattern to when I had graduated and gave the valedictorian speech. I wondered if Daniel rode with them or maybe had a girlfriend to take him instead. I snickered when I recalled Edward reading the minds of the girls who had a crush on Daniel in the past. I never allowed him to tell me what Daniel was thinking. I would never dare to breach that privacy for him. And I too wanted to be spared any pain if he ever thought about me when Edward was around to hear it.

I re-entered my blue Cadillac and sped down the road. The need for speed as a vampire was real and exhilarating behind the wheel of a car. The Cadillac screeched to a halt when I spotted a flipped Ford Explorer in the corner of my eye. The stretch of road was a mile until a residential area. I didn't want to be late to the graduation ceremony, but I figured I could miss the beginning semantics of the ceremony and be a good samaritan.

I exited the car swiftly to begin my emergency rescue. I smelt burnt rubber as I approached. The side of the vehicle was smashed in. But there was no other car. Fury trampled through me as I recognized it was a hit and run. _How fucked up._

"Hello? I am going to help. Please close your eyes," I announced to the passenger's inside the vehicle. I then smashed my fist through the tinted glass in the driver's side window. It would have been easier to pull the whole door off, but that would have been to abnormal for a girl my size to explain.

The first size hole I created was enough to loop my hand through and open the door. I still hadn't received a verbal response from the people inside. I grew worried over their lack of communication and decided to concentrate harder on my hearing abilities. I could only pick up on a single beating heart that seemed to be slowing in rhythm. I prayed only one person was inside the vehicle.

I flung open the door. Grief snaked up within me and distorted my vision as my eyes raked over the passengers inside.

"_Mom? Dad?_" Their set expressions triggered my response first. I ran my fingers over each of their wrists to confirm what I already knew.

**Dead. **

"Daniel?!" The only heart left beating, and it was thinning out. It was giving up.

"Daniel!" I cried as I jumped into the back seat and swept him up in my arms. "No, no, no! Not like this. You had your whole future in front of you. So much to do and become. It's not fair!" I shouted in aguish. Tears began to blur my vision as I shook Daniel to force him to wake up. To get better. I wasn't a doctor, but my ears didn't lie. His injuries were internal, and he was succumbing to them.

And in this moment, I remembered Alice and her decision to choose life for me. It wasn't her decision to make but I understood now why she did it as I lowered my fangs to Daniel's neck. "I love you, kiddo. This isn't the end for you. Just the beginning. _I promise_," I murmured before I made an irreversible decision that I hoped he wouldn't hate me for all of eternity.

...

**8 years later.**

My heart swelled with pride as I watched Daniel walk across the graduation stage. He just earned a bachelor's degree in Mechanical Engineering from Yale. His first of many degrees to come.

Edward laced his fingers through my own before he leaned over and pressed his lips to my cheek. Today, it was just us two in the audience. The rest of our family was setting up the graduation party at home. "We're all proud of him, _and they are too_." Edward gazed up to the sky and I knew who he meant.

"They could also be here too. Who knows? I can't pretend I understand anything anymore. All I know is, as I live, I want a life full of love. With you. Alice. Daniel. Our family. _I love you, Edward_."

"I'm glad. Because you're stuck with me for an eternity."

"Maybe," I jabbed. "I could get sick of you."

"I highly doubt that," he promised before leaning in and placing a kiss on my neck. My weakest spot. Damn him.

"Maybe. But you still haven't put a ring on it. So, I am an unshackled woman, technically."

"That's because you insisted we wait," Edward growled while I smirked before raising my finger to my lips to make the universal symbol to be quiet.

"I had things to sort out. Alice and I needed to repair our relationship. Then there was Daniel. I mean, I am in no rush. And it's not like you're a virgin anymore." I winked and I saw a faint glimmer in his golden eyes that had fixated a stare on me.

"_Please_, Jessica. It would mean a lot to me."

"I know," I sighed. It wasn't a matter of if, but when.

"We're soul mates, right? Isn't that enough?"

"You are enough. But this is for me. It can be just us at a courthouse, if you don't want to make a big deal out of it."

I snorted. "Like our family would ever let us live that down. I'll think about it."

Edward displayed the most adorable pout and I just poked his bottom lip with my finger in amusement. "That's progress, you know?"

What Edward didn't know was that tonight I was popping the question to him. Because he had been patient with me as I healed the different parts of me into one person. He let me have alone time to remind rebuild my relationship with Alice and gave me space to handle Daniel and transition him to this life.

I had put Edward to the side long enough. Daniel was making his way and Alice and I were on the best of terms. Sisters again. It was time for me to give my all to Edward because I was finally capable of doing that. He was the love of my life and he deserved my all. I was so happy to finally give it to him.

We would have our happily ever after. And I had this hope that maybe, _just maybe_, one day I would see all the family who left before me. If I had Jenna back, all bets were off. I would look for the signs but still live my life. Love. Enjoy what I can. Because that is what life was about.

And it felt _so good _to say YOLO once Drake's song came out.

Because my name is Jessica Katie Stanley. This is my second chance at life. And I am not taking anything or anyone for granted.

_**The End.**_

* * *

**Authors Note:** _I feel good I have both option endings out there. I am a big believer in alternate endings because I like to explore potential. I am glad in this version Jessica finds peace and happiness with Edward/Alice/Daniel. And this my friends, is the end for the Arc. _

_The name for this story "__**Five years**__" had multiple meanings for this Arc. If you noticed, the time length of "__five years__" is a popular line in this story for significant impacts on Katie/Jessica's life. _

_This Arc contained writing my favorite chapter in JHEA. Thanks for reading and giving this story a chance. Much love to all my fans/readers. You guys rock & I appreciate you taking the time to read this. - Lalaland972_


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